Everything seems perfect. The two of you are hitting it off great! Suddenly, his responses stop cold. Your mind races as you attempt to figure him out. Where did he go? Is he going to text back? All of these thoughts are normal. There are several reasons that your babe might not be texting you back.
- 1 Why He’s Stopped Talking
- 1.1 1. He suddenly stopped talking because something is wrong
- 1.2 2. He’s moved on
- 1.3 3. He’s super busy
- 1.4 4. He’s playing the waiting game
- 1.5 5. He doesn’t want to bother you
- 1.6 6. You just had sex
- 1.7 7. You don’t want the same thing
- 1.8 8. He’s thinking of you
- 1.9 9. He got what he wanted
- 1.10 10. He’s losing interest
- 1.11 11. He has really strong feelings
- 2 What To Do When He Stops Talking To You
- 3 FAQs
- 4 Summary
Why He’s Stopped Talking
Guys don’t work the same way that girls do. While we want to communicate our feelings and speak with them all day every day, guys tend to put less effort into communication. They also tend to go silent for quite a few reasons.
Cracking the code to your man’s behavior can be challenging, but these eleven reasons why he might not be talking can help you figure out what’s going on.
1. He suddenly stopped talking because something is wrong
While this is a worst-case scenario, it does happen. My mother was livid when she thought a guy ghosted her. She didn’t hear from him for almost a week. It turned out that he had been in a car accident, and was in the hospital.
After receiving her barrage of text messages, he even sent her pictures of the paperwork from the hospital. Her reaction was a bit of a turn-off for him though. So, remember to play it cool just in case.
2. He’s moved on
Sometimes, mutual attraction tends to fade away. If he’s no longer into you, he might not want to hurt your feelings and tell you. Instead, he is ghosting you. When a man ghosts you, you won’t hear from him at all. If he doesn’t respond in a few days, it might just be time to move on. (Men that were in a car accident will text you eventually.)
3. He’s super busy
Men tend to put their phones in their pockets when they are occupied. Don’t expect a quick text back. Honestly, he could be engrossed in a new hobby. This is especially common at the beginning of a relationship.
4. He’s playing the waiting game
There’s this age-old dating rule that you should make people wait. Women should make men wait for a specific period of time before having sex or they will not be interested or respect you.
Likewise, men should make women wait for a certain period of time before texting back. This helps keep them interested and is supposed to make women like them more. It doesn’t always work, but men keep doing it.
5. He doesn’t want to bother you
When a man is really interested in you, he won’t want to do anything wrong. Texting a person all day can seem to smother, so he is more likely to try to avoid that. He won’t want to do anything that can push you away.
It can be helpful to tell the guy that you’re talking to that you like to text a lot, or that it doesn’t bother you when he texts you all day.
6. You just had sex
Believe it or not, it’s perfectly normal for boys to ghost you for a couple of days after they have sex. Their testosterone levels increase when they chase you. Then, after they have sex, those same hormone levels decrease for a brief period of time. During this time, men don’t chase you as much. After a few days, they will slowly build back up, and then he will text you again.
7. You don’t want the same thing
Men get a bad rep for just wanting to have sex a lot. However, that is not always the case. Plenty of men prefer relationships over one-night stands.
Unfortunately, women assume that every man is down for some fun if that’s what they want. While he might have wanted a relationship, he will stop texting if he feels that you don’t. It’s not because he thinks there’s something wrong with you. He’s simply looking for something else.
Most guys have a hard time telling girls the honest truth because they don’t want to hurt their feelings.
8. He’s thinking of you
Maybe he had a great time with you, and he’s considering a romantic relationship. Men prefer to put deep thought into things. Guys will be quiet as they continue to think. This silence helps them concentrate on the task at hand, which is deciding if they want to pursue things with you on a deeper level.
That’s one reason why it’s vital to remember that just because a guy stops texting doesn’t mean that he doesn’t like you.
9. He got what he wanted
Ones that are only interested in sex will stop texting afterward. He stopped talking because he already got what he wanted. Most women think that making a guy wait for sex is the instant answer to this problem, but that is not how it works.
Some men like the chase, and will continue to chase you until they get it regardless of how long that takes. This even applies to the rule of making him wait three months to make sure that he really likes you. Doing things like that make you more enticing because you’re a challenge.
However, they still only wanted one thing. Signs to watch for that indicate that a guy only wants sex include:
- You don’t get straight answers when you mention a serious relationship with him
- He mentions going back to his house a lot
- Conversations seem to turn to sexual topics constantly
- Compliments are based on your looks
- There’s never a desire to get to know you as a person
- He doesn’t want you to get to know him. That means that he will answer your questions with brief answers, and will not ask follow-up questions
- He blatantly states he does not want a relationship right now
When a guy is only interested in your body, he might stop talking once he gets some booty. Then, he will start talking to you again when he wants some more. Men won’t tell you the real reason behind this. Decide what you want, and don’t settle for less than that.
10. He’s losing interest
If you just met, and the conversation was slowly filled with awkward silences, this could be the case. No one wants to feel as though they are boring or uninteresting, and you’re not. However, you need to spice things up a bit to grab his attention again.
Bring up topics that you know he’ll like. Men love talking about themselves too. If that doesn’t work, try these tips to make him text back faster.
11. He has really strong feelings
Sometimes, when a guy has feelings for you, they don’t know how to express those feelings. He won’t tell you how he feels until he is sure that you feel the same way. Men get butterflies in their stomachs and feel awkward just like we do. That’s why they get quiet when they like someone on a romantic level. The idea of the two of you together is making his knees weak.
Be patient with guys that are quiet but obviously like you. Men that are not confident will suddenly act very nervous. It takes them time to come out of their shells, but these guys are well worth the wait. They are the ones that like you so much they will do anything in the world for you.
What To Do When He Stops Talking To You
When he doesn’t talk back, how you handle the situation can instantly tell you whether he will ever talk to you again. There are certain things that you should, and shouldn’t, so if you want to get a text from him again.
12. Don’t blow up his phone
Do not double text him. Send one text. That is it. It doesn’t matter if he takes three days to respond, you need to keep your cool. If you don’t, you risk looking needy and desperate.
The only exception is if you think he is losing interest. When you believe he’s not feeling you, send him a text that you know will initiate a conversation with him. Then, just leave it there.
13. Consider the relationship
If you’ve just started talking to him, it is normal to only talk to each other every so often. Men don’t always text women every day in the beginning. You don’t know his routines and hobbies yet in the beginning either.
He could be occupied with a car that he’s working on and not looking at his phone. Don’t let it get you down. Instead, pick up a new hobby to keep your mind and body occupied.
14. Don’t ask him about it
When he does text you back, and he probably will at some point, continue your play it cool approach. Don’t ask him why he hasn’t texted. That wreaks of a “nagging, controlling girlfriend.” Instead, carry on with the conversation as if nothing is wrong.
Guys are known for not communicating well with the opposite sex. He has feelings for you and doesn’t know what to do. This is common in men with less experience in relationships. It’s caused an internal crisis that he is still figuring out. On the other hand, he might be hanging out with friends or stressed about something that has nothing to do with you.
They are occupied with something else. Men sometimes need some alone time to decompress after stressful days or events and often go silent during those times. He’s trying to figure out something. On the other hand, he might have moved on. Text him once, and then wait to see if he responds.
Silence can do a few things to a man. It can make a man re-evaluate things, especially if he was slowly becoming less intrigued by you or felt that the chase was over. It can also make him feel anxious or angry because it can be used as manipulation, and often is.
Men withdraw for a variety of reasons. Either he has feelings or has realized that he doesn’t want a relationship with you. He could be dealing with deeply personal issues that he doesn’t feel comfortable sharing. The best way to know is to simply ask him.
Yes, he will. Once you stop texting him, he’ll start to wonder what you’re doing. He will want to talk to you again. Going no contact is the quickest way to make any man miss you. Don’t do it for too long, or he’ll think you don’t like him and simply move on to someone else, though.
Guys stop communicating for so many reasons it can seem impossible to figure out why he’s suddenly silent. What are some of the most common reasons you’ve found that guys stop texting back?
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.