When we wonder why guys in relationships go to clubs, the first thought that occurs to us is that he’s cheating. However, that isn’t always the case. There are several reasons that your man might be headed out the door to go to the club, and some of them are completely harmless.
- 1 Why He’s Still Going Clubbing
- 1.1 1. Cheating
- 1.2 2. It’s a work function
- 1.3 3. He likes dancing
- 1.4 4. He likes spending time with the guys
- 1.5 5. He doesn’t think strip clubs are a big deal
- 1.6 6. He needs to blow off steam
- 1.7 7. It makes him feel younger
- 1.8 8. He needs space
- 1.9 9. Nightclubs are an awesome vibe
- 1.10 10. He wants to be the life of the party
- 1.11 11. He’s going to get drunk
- 2 FAQs
- 3 The Bottomline
Why He’s Still Going Clubbing
If your man is enjoying a night out on the town, it’s not a reason to stress yourself out. There are quite a few reasons that he could be going to the club. We instantly assume that he will be cheating or enjoying a lap dance, but that’s not always the case.
It’s on all of our minds, so I’m going to list it. It is a reason that he might be going out to the club. He could be meeting a girl there. He might be getting lap dances. This all comes down to whether he’s cheating or not.
Some men do go to the club to have a side piece, and we all know that. It’s the reason why it’s the first thing that comes to mind when we think of him heading to a dance club for drinks. However, that might not be the case. Look for other signs that your man is cheating, and consider these other reasons too.
2. It’s a work function
If you’ve ever dated a guy that has to entertain business executives from out of town, you know that it’s his job to make sure that they have a good time. He might have a drink or two while there, but that’s not the reason he’s there. When businesses have a blast with other businesses, they’re more likely to close a deal.
3. He likes dancing
Busting a move in the living room is simply not the same as the pounding speakers and vibe at a club. Anyone that loves to dance knows that this is the ultimate place to go. You can dance with anyone. Enjoying the night just goes hand in hand with these places.
4. He likes spending time with the guys
Just like we enjoy a girls' night every once in a while, he enjoys heading out for the night with the boys. If some of the guys are still single, they’re bound to go to a strip club at least once or twice. That doesn’t mean that he’s not being loyal to you. It simply means that he’s having a blast with them.
5. He doesn’t think strip clubs are a big deal
One huge fight about strip clubs and you’ll instantly know how he feels about them. While you might think a lap dance is cheating, he might think that as long as there is no penetration it’s fine.
This is where the two of you need to sit down and have an open, honest conversation about strip clubs. If you feel that going to a strip club is cheating, that should be respected.
Likewise, if you feel that a strip club is okay because he’s coming home to you at night you should verbalize that. Let him communicate how he sees a strip club as well. Then, the two of you need to reach an agreement about them.
6. He needs to blow off steam
Most guys will head out if they just got into an argument. This could cause more of a problem in the relationship, but he’s not thinking about that at the moment. All he’s thinking about is calming down and enjoying a happy environment. It probably isn’t even about a girl.
7. It makes him feel younger
If the two of you have been in a relationship for a while, he’s probably getting older. Sitting around the house or doing relationship things can actually make him feel even older. Your boyfriend might be reliving his youth by going to nightclubs and dancing the night away.
If he used to head to the club a lot when he was younger, it more than likely brings back a lot of happy memories. Let him have his fun. He’ll be back home when he’s done.
8. He needs space
Even though you’re in a relationship, it’s perfectly healthy to have your own lives outside of a relationship. When you’re with one another around the clock, it can start to feel like you’re being smothered. Sometimes, only one person feels this way.
It can leave you wondering whether he has other girlfriends. You might worry. It’s actually pretty common for a person to wonder if they are going to break up with them. Don’t do that to yourself, and don’t let yourself feel bad.
Instead, find your own hobbies. Go get drunk with a girlfriend. Have a life of your own just like he is. It’s good for you both.
9. Nightclubs are an awesome vibe
Have you ever been to a nightclub? They have their own energy to them. You spend so much time getting ready and listening to music so you instantly feel happy because you look amazing. The music and lights are a really energetic atmosphere. You can go out to smoke and make seven new friends.
If you’re ignorant on the dance floor, someone will probably complement your moves. Going out isn’t always what you would expect, and it’s not always about getting laid. If your boyfriend used to like to party, he probably just likes the energy.
10. He wants to be the life of the party
You might be fun, but there’s no party with just a husband and wife. It’s just not the same as being surrounded by a few hundred people in an energetic atmosphere and having a blast. If you know that he loves to be the life of the party, this instantly explains why he’s heading out every Friday night.
Sometimes, you’re going to wonder if he’s being faithful in your relationship or if he wants attention from other girls. If that’s the case, you can always mention going with him. Another great idea is to volunteer to be his designated driver. You might feel better about him wanting to go clubbing and your relationship once you see he’s just having fun.
11. He’s going to get drunk
I think this is the worst part of having a man that goes to the nightclub, especially if this is their reason for going. If he has to take a cab home, he’s going to stagger in drunk. It’s not safe for him to drive himself home.
As his wife or girlfriend, you’re obligated to take care of him while he’s heavily intoxicated. I’m obviously not a fan of slobbery drunk boyfriends. However, this is still a better reason than him cheating.
The only time that this becomes a real problem, though, is if it isn’t safe or if he’s become an alcoholic. If he has to enjoy the club scene, and the alcohol, to be happy that’s a problem. His getting in trouble for a DUI or totaling the car is not okay, and can also put you in a tough situation.
When you are in a committed relationship, you always have to think about the other person. If he’s let it go this far, he’s obviously not thinking about you when he’s out.
That depends on what you have agreed on. While one person might not have a problem with this, another will feel that it’s not appropriate to do in a relationship. You need to talk about this with your partner so the two of you can reach an agreement.
Men head to the nightclub for various reasons. He might be entertaining people from work. Another reason is to let off some steam or get drunk. If your man likes to dance, he probably just loves the energy on the dance floor.
Yes. Most of the time, a significant other doesn’t have a problem with it because the girl is getting paid for the lapdance, which makes it more transactional. There’s also a bouncer there to make sure that nothing more happens. Some places have no touching rules.
Ask your partner. To some people, it’s cheating. To others, it’s not. It’s important to discuss boundaries regarding this sort of thing within the relationship. If you have a disagreement, try to reach a compromise.
Yes, it is. The two of you should be able to trust each other. If you can’t, it’s important to look into how to build trust in a relationship. It’s important to remember that your guy might not want to go to parties to cheat. He may just enjoy partying.
Guys that are in relationships go to clubs for different reasons. Maybe he likes to dance or wants to have a drink. Perhaps he’s going out with his friends. What are some other reasons a guy might go to the club even though he’s in a relationship?
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.