Once a cheater, always a cheater! That’s a very famous saying I keep hearing from both guys and girls. I must admit, this statement has some amount of truth to it since many of us hardly change our ways. Cheaters are more prone to keep cheating on their partners instead of changing; unless they greatly suffer from their misdeeds.
In worst-case scenarios, the cheating partner might even project blame on the unfortunate, loving, and loyal spouse, with comments such as ‘you made me do it,' ‘I wasn't happy,' and ‘we were on a break.' These sentences are very tedious and can leave partners scarred for eternity.
But why exactly do people cheat? And what's the rationale behind their cheating antics? Furthermore, what does cheating say about the person? I will answer all these questions and more in the following paragraphs.
- 1 What Does Cheating Say About a Person
- 2 FAQs
- 3 To Sum Things Up
What Does Cheating Say About a Person
1. They are impulsive
When cheating happens, a lot of things can be derived about a person's character, from their actions, and cheating is no different. Cheating says a lot about the person who cheats, quickly displaying how emotion-driven and thoughtless the person might be. One significant thing cheating says about somebody is that the person doesn't have enough willpower to say ‘No' to new sexual and romantic opportunities.
What’s more, a cheater is controlled solely by their emotions of desirability, and as such, their intellect is underdeveloped, preventing them from seeing the value in the things they have or possess. So, instead of taking time to work on the foundation of the person's relationship, a cheater only looks to boost his or her emotional gratification outside their relationship.
If your partner cheats on you, know that it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Your partner simply lacked a lot of self-control and that their mind-set is just too weak to allow them to stay faithful to you.
2. They are indecisive
The second thing cheating says about a person is that they're highly indecisive. The ability to be decisive comes with the making of concrete decisions, and as such, one is required to have strong willpower. This is something many individuals lack and have no intention of correcting. Many people cannot decide on which individual who will be their constant companion in their life.
People like this aren't the ideal group to have as long-term partners within a committed relationship. Furthermore, the indecisiveness of such people leads them to explore more by having some form of physical intimacy with someone else outside their relationship. When a person cheats, they tend to feel remorse often saying ‘it was just a one-time incident,' especially when their partner finds out.
3. Lack of self-respect
Cheaters always make a conscious decision to cheat, although emotions often drive them. Before the act is done, a cheater rationally checks that it’s okay to go ahead with physical intimacy with another person, making sure that they want the cheating to feel good.
An instance is when your partner is drunk and is begged by someone to cheat. Your partner, at this point, still has a brain and choice to decide what matters most; their relationship with you or temporary intimate satisfaction with another. If your partner cares about his actions and his partner, he will not give in, but if he considers the affection of the other person, he will give in to the request.
Also, when a person loses their self-respect and stops caring about their image, cheating can occur. This is because, in many cases, there is a lack of self-awareness and appreciation for themselves and others in their lives. What’s more, this lack of self-respect causes the cheater to act on their primal instincts, doing what makes them feel good instead of what's right.
Some individuals still carry scars from their past relationships, and this is a standard and sad part of a cheater's personality. Some partners who turn out to be unfaithful were probably ignored as children or in their adult relationships, had love and attention withheld – or were even emotionally abused as children. What’s more, it could even be that their relationship role models ended up in messed up relationships.
Additionally, many insecure people tend to be overly emotionally dependent on their significant others and partners. Their desire to be seen, loved, and appreciated may cause them to cheat. Also, their fear of being alone might cause them to make backup plans for their current relationships; just to ensure that someone else will always be available to them. Insecurities cannot be solved by the partners, but only by the cheater either through introspection or therapy.
It is no secret that all cheaters are mighty inconsiderate. Cheaters are inconsiderate and usually, for no reason. Before, during, and sometimes after they cheat, cheaters don't think about how cheating is going to affect the loyal partner's feelings and how long the damage caused can last. They usually see themselves as victims and believe that they've been wronged and robbed of any opportunity they could've used to do what's best for them.
On top of this; to justify their betrayal, cheaters try to make themselves look better by making everyone around them look bad. This includes trash-talking and revealing all their partner's secrets.
6. Seeking thrills
Cheaters love taking risks, not just with their relationships but also in other areas of their lives as well. When something important is at stake for cheaters, they feel a particular rush that gives them a significant thrill. Their fear of getting caught, and the lies they tell often help to fuel their fire. No doubt, cheaters, by default, can't resist the thrill of the chase; thus, when that kind of opportunity arrives, they give in without hesitation.
The ability to take risks Is excellent for businesses and other parts of life, but with a relationship, certain risks can cause a lot of damage to all parties involved. Cheaters think of their infidelity as a win-win situation, often not giving regard to the other people involved. They even trash talk about their sex life, say nasty things about their partner, as well as send secret text messages knowing very well what they are doing is wrong; as well as.
7. Low self-esteem
Besides being self-centered and having no respect for themselves, people who cheat most often do so because of their personal views about themselves. A person's low self-esteem often causes them to believe worse about themselves, increasing their chances of cheating.No doubt, the possibility of cheating often increases because the cheating party craves recognition from the people he or she values.
No one will cheat on someone they value. So, if a guy cheats on you, your honor and recognition doesn't mean anything to him. The case is even worse if he is tally marks all those he has been with, so as to brag to his friends.
8. No emotional strength
Strength is one primary requirement for everything in life, and relationships are no exception. All relationships, romantic or not, require self-control during arguments, as well as positive thinking, lots of healthy communication, and many other elements. When some partners talk about their relationships being too stressful, it merely shows their lack of self-control and patience to stay committed.
What’s more, the cheating, which occurs as a result of no emotional strength, is done to relieve any emotional burden that is kept throughout the entire relationship with a loyal partner. Furthermore, the ability of a cheater to be unfaithful is based on the quality of thoughts they produce, how these thoughts affect their feelings towards other people. On top of this, thinking patterns can cause cheating partners to be exhausted mentally, causing them to break up with their partners or cheat when the opportunity presents itself.
9. They are secretive
Yes, every cheater is great at keeping secrets, since their primary instinct is to keep every detail of their personal life private, with all their individual information guarded securely. The primary reason why cheaters do this flawlessly is that they don't want to leave trails of their actions behind.
Furthermore, research shows that one significant tendency of cheaters is to hide. Hiding involves acts like avoiding social media or using social media under fake names. Luckily, with ever-advancing technology, sites like Google are known to track the most minute details of people's lives, making it very easy to leave a trace of your actions behind.
10. Unhappy in relationships
If your partner cheats on you, chances are he or she isn't sexually or emotionally content in the relationship. Also, he won’t feel like having sex regularly and might feel that he deserves better or more than what is being offered As such, he will subconsciously keep an open mind for new romantic opportunities. And when such opportunities come through, he will seize it and cheat without any guilt and shame, mainly because he believes in his right to be happy.
Generally, the happiness of cheaters is sought without thinking of their loyal partner's feelings, or their joy. Being unhappy in relationships can be very tough, and breaking up even tougher, but to cheat on a loyal partner because of this is simply inexcusable.
11. They can do it again
We've all come across the cliché term, ‘once a cheater, always a cheater’. This saying runs true in many instances, (although not all). This is because it is believed that many who have cheated or broken the trust of their partners are more likely to do the same thing repeatedly. If your partner has cheated several times already, as a loyal spouse, you must be wary when offering another chance to the relationship or marriage, since you stand the risk of getting badly hurt if the situation occurs again.
Although many cheaters do change their ways, there are probably not that many cases witnessed. So, the choice of sticking with someone who cheated before is entirely up to the spouse, considering the situations that arise.
When cheating happens, it sends a clear message that the person doesn’t care about you. Worse yet; It paints the cheater as a self-centered, impulsive, and insecure person who is unsure about what they need in a relationship and who they need to be with.
To be honest, there is really no way to determine how the conversation will turn out. However, I will advise not to be afraid to fully let out your feelings. Be vocal and openly express your thoughts and emotions. With that being said; the first outburst doesn't have to be to your partner. You can scream, break wine glasses, and cry until you feel better, in the comfort of your home.
The reason behind exploding privately is because when one is feeling overwhelmed and overly emotional, there's a high tendency to be destructive with your words and actions. These actions may not yield profitable results, which is why it's better to express your emotions to yourself first. After letting out your feelings, give significant thought to your situation.
The answer to this question is straightforward. Anyone who cheats on their partner doesn't love them. Love goes hand in hand with respect, and if there’s no respect, infidelity will thrive. What’s more, if someone loves you, they see you and only you, and as such, no one else exists or matters to them. A cheating partner makes it clear to the loyal spouse that both of you weren't right for each other from the beginning.
Most cheaters are unfaithful because of fear. Their fear stems from the fact that they feel unlovable, they're afraid they're bring discounted, or they may have lost their sex appeal. Since they feel unseen with no form of validation insight, they seek validation in other ways, with infidelity being one of their most comfortable channels.
Some people cheat and afterward, feel an awful amount of guilt once they realize how terrible their one-night stand or a secret affair was. Furthermore, they always wish they could take back their actions, and the pain inflicted on a loyal significant other.
To Sum Things Up
If you are currently experiencing heartache caused by a cheater, remember, only one person is responsible for cheating, and that is the person who engages in the act. If a person wants to give up on a relationship, it is better to do so amicably, instead of cheating on a loyal partner. Doing this is the morally right and respectable thing to do.
I hope you found this article helpful – of so, drop your comments in the below box and feel free to share with close friends.
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.