What’s the most shocking way an ex has broken up with you? Did you see the break-up coming or did it catch you by surprise? Did you notice signs that he was going to break things off or he threw you a loop and that was the end?
If you’ve ever experienced an unexpected break-up, you’d want to know the signs that will prepare you for an eventual break-up situation. When things start going sour in a relationship, there will be signs that you can watch out for. Except you intentionally ignore these signs, you will notice them, whether they are subtle or obvious ones.
If your man is someone you love so much and want to keep in your life, recognizing signs he wants to break up will help you map out a plan for securing your relationship with him.
However, if you don’t observe the signs that your love life with this guy is about to end, you’ll be left all alone and broken-hearted.
In this article, you will get valid tips on signs he wants to break up with you. This information will help you stay on guard to either keep your relationship going, end things before he does or, be at peace when he finally breaks up with you.
- 1 27 Obvious Signs He Wants to Break Up
- 1.1 1. Communicating with him becomes difficult
- 1.2 2. There doesn’t seem to be any peace left in the relationship
- 1.3 3. There’s no agreeing with him on important issues
- 1.4 4. Your words don’t seem to hold any importance to him anymore
- 1.5 5. He is keeping secrets from you
- 1.6 6. No form of a romantic dialogue happens between both of you
- 1.7 7. Things are starting to seem routine-like in your relationship
- 1.8 8. Your relationship has lost that initial spark that existed at the beginning
- 1.9 9. Your gut feeling tells you he is about to end things with you
- 1.10 10. You have a terminal disease
- 1.11 11. He is going to hangouts without you
- 1.12 12. He doesn’t care all that much about how you feel anymore
- 1.13 13. You’re considering cheating on him
- 1.14 14. He avoids any form of discussion that may lead to confrontation
- 1.15 15. He doesn’t want to talk about topics concerning the future
- 1.16 16. Even when you spend time together, he'd rather play video games
- 1.17 17. Your sex life has taken a downturn
- 1.18 18. All he wants to do is have sex
- 1.19 19. You no longer seem to be his match sexually
- 1.20 20. He has something to complain about
- 1.21 21. Gifts and favors are no longer a thing in the relationship
- 1.22 22. His words now seem like they are coming from a stranger
- 1.23 23. He doesn’t show up for you like he used to
- 1.24 24. He isn’t reluctant to let you know he’s chatting or talking with other girls
- 1.25 25. He doesn’t put any effort into improving his looks or attitude around you
- 1.26 26. It is obvious you’re the only one trying to make the relationship work
- 1.27 27. He is no longer bothered by things he used to get angry at you for
- 2 FAQs
- 3 In Conclusion
27 Obvious Signs He Wants to Break Up
1. Communicating with him becomes difficult
You are supposed to have an effortless flow of communication with your significant other but, when you can no longer reach him whenever you want or, it appears he is avoiding you, it could be a sign he wants to break up with you.
You shouldn’t just conclude that is the case though. Do your best to get him to talk with you then, find out what the problem is. If he says something about ending things, you won’t be too surprised because his actions suggested he had lost interest in you.
2. There doesn’t seem to be any peace left in the relationship
In every relationship, there should be a measure of peace that balances the passion you both feel for each other. It is this inherent peace that assures you that your man is fine even when you’re not in the same place. That same feeling of peace is what you feel whenever you spend time with him.
The moment you feel like the peace in your relationship is gone and has been replaced with anxiety, your relationship might be hitting rock bottom soon. Also, your man is probably ready to break up with you too.
3. There’s no agreeing with him on important issues
Before now, you used to have serious conversations that will end in some sort of agreement about what you both should do. However, since things started going awry, he never comes to any agreement with you. Instead, it seems he is deliberately refusing to consider your opinion just so you’ll be frustrated.
This is one of the red flags that indicate he is thinking about breaking up with you. If this behavior persists, you may want to beat him to his game and break up with him because you deserve to be in a healthy relationship.
4. Your words don’t seem to hold any importance to him anymore
Where your opinion used to be equally important and you both made decisions together, he now views your words as meaningless, it could be a sign he doesn’t respect you any longer.
When you now tell him you don’t like something but, he pretends like he didn’t hear you, that’s a big red flag that you don’t matter to him. Rather than stew over it, confront him or make a clean break before he breaks your heart.
5. He is keeping secrets from you
Someone who wants to break up with you will inevitably keep secrets from you. You will notice it in the way he leaves the room when he wants to take a call when he goes somewhere without telling you and still doesn’t give you a clear reason when he gets back.
You will observe these secretive signs unless you want to be blind to them. However, if he isn’t hiding something from you, he will come clean the moment you call him out on his behavior.
6. No form of a romantic dialogue happens between both of you
One way to know if your man is still in love with you is if he still exhibits some romantic actions despite having been together for a long time. At the point in your relationship where you both have settled into each other, things could mellow due to individual responsibilities.
However, you and your partner would still try to keep the romance vibe going because you love each other. When he no longer wants to talk sweet nothings with you or hold hands with you in public, he probably doesn’t want you anymore and will break up with you soon.
7. Things are starting to seem routine-like in your relationship
Like the loss of romantic dialogue, if you observe that your relationship is beginning to look like reporting to work, there is a problem.
If your relationship looks like this; you talk in the morning, eat lunch or dinner together twice a week and you have sex six times a month. That arrangement with no room for improvement or occasional spontaneity looks like a breakup waiting to happen.
Have a chat with your partner and request that things take a new turn. If he has started entertaining the idea of breaking up with you, it will be obvious in that conversation.
8. Your relationship has lost that initial spark that existed at the beginning
At the start of every relationship, there is usually a spark that makes each party feel like they are doing something right or that everything is alright with the world. As the relationship progresses, you may lose the wonder of this spark a little because life will get in the way. It’s up to both of you not to let troubles completely suck the passion out of your relationship.
However, there are situations whereby once the spark goes out of a relationship, there is nothing you can do to restore it. You should want to know if you can rekindle the spark or if breakup is a reasonable option.
9. Your gut feeling tells you he is about to end things with you
Sometimes, people can play their games so well that no one will know what they are up to until it’s too late. However, no matter how masterful in deceit a man is, he can still leave crumbs and signs he wants to break up with you.
If your gut feeling is that he intends to break up with you, trust it and ask your man if he is going to do just that. You have nothing to lose; he would either reassure you that he is going nowhere or he indeed thinks you should break up.
10. You have a terminal disease
This is a horrible reason for anyone to break up with their partner but harsh reality shows that it can happen to almost anyone. If you were recently diagnosed with a serious illness and you notice that your man changes around that time, it is possible he wants to break up with you.
Even if he knew you had a terminal disease when you first started dating, a guy can change his mind about sticking it out with you due to fear or pressure from people. The sooner you see these signs he wants to break up with you, the sooner you’re able to heal and move on.
11. He is going to hangouts without you
It is normal to have personal fun times or hangouts with friends but, to completely ghost you from going out with him is one of the signs he wants to dump you. He tells you he has work to do, that’s why he had to cancel your date but a few hours later, you see pictures of him online in the same outfit, chilling with his friends.
This is a loud warning that he doesn’t want to be seen with you anymore.
12. He doesn’t care all that much about how you feel anymore
When things were well and good between the two of you, he expressed his love and care in various ways that amazed you. However, when he changed, he couldn’t be bothered with checking up on you even once a day.
You do the checking up but he doesn’t return the gesture or, when he does, it’s in an offhand way that makes you feel like you don’t mean much to him. This is one of the clear signs he wants to break up with you.
13. You’re considering cheating on him
While this may seem like a ‘you’ problem, your urge to cheat on your man with another person could stem from his abandonment of you and your relationship. While no one is encouraging you to give your affection to the first guy that shows interest in you, the fact that you’re considering cheating is a sign that all has not been well in your relationship for a while.
You may want to break up or sort out your feelings with him before he ends things with you.
14. He avoids any form of discussion that may lead to confrontation
Confrontations and arguments should be minimal in every relationship but, it shouldn’t be totally off the table. When you can’t confront the man you love about his rotten attitude because you’re scared he’ll leave you, you have your answer about whether he wants to break up with you.
If he avoids confrontation and claims he doesn’t want any problem, he already sees you as a problem.
15. He doesn’t want to talk about topics concerning the future
Another way to spot a man who wants to break things up with you is when he doesn’t tie your relationship to future matters. If he uses words like ‘maybe, probably, and most likely’ to describe what your relationship with him will be like in the future, you should start kissing your happy love life goodbye.
Also, when you ask him about taking the next step in your relationship and he avoids the topic like a plague, he is running from staying committed to you and is probably planning his break-up speech already.
16. Even when you spend time together, he'd rather play video games
Some people might say, “it’s the way of men to love videogames”. However, loving video games has never taken the place of love when a man loves his woman.
If you observe that even after you complained to him several times, he cannot drop his gamepad for a minute to talk or hang out with you, he doesn’t want you anymore.
17. Your sex life has taken a downturn
Sex used to be one of the things that bonded you together with him but, he no longer wants to have sex with you, he is either cheating on you or, he doesn’t find you sexually attractive anymore.
It’s also possible that his sexual preference has changed. This issue can be sensitive but, you still need to confront him about it.
18. All he wants to do is have sex
The case could also be that he never seems to want to do anything else but have sex with you. He ignores you most of the time, doesn’t help out with anything that doesn’t concern him but, he’s ready for sex whenever, you should break up with him first. Sooner or later, he will have no use for you again.
19. You no longer seem to be his match sexually
You used to have fun and explore different things sexually but now, he thinks you’re dull or wants to push you beyond the limits you’re comfortable with. It could even be that he’s the one unwilling to do the things you both used to do before.
Once the sexual chemistry is no longer there, a man will think about breaking up with you so he can take up with someone else.
20. He has something to complain about
When you love someone, you’re sometimes blinded to their faults. The minute you stop loving them or start disliking them, your eyes become open to their shortcomings.
If your man doesn’t like you like he used to do, nothing you do will appear right anymore. You’ll look less attractive to him and everything you do will displease him. You should address his constant complaining to know what’s wrong.
21. Gifts and favors are no longer a thing in the relationship
Giving is a natural act that comes to most lovers. Giving could be in the form of physical things, cash, or acts of service. You and your man would have been sharing either of the three before now. As such, you would feel troubled when they completely stop.
Neither of you is obligated to give these things but, it has become a part of the relationship, why should he suddenly stop, especially when you continue showering him with said gifts?
22. His words now seem like they are coming from a stranger
When you think you know someone and they seem to change overnight into strangers, it hurts. Similarly, when your man starts to say things that hurt you, especially when you don’t deserve them, you will be devastated.
Rather than stay in a toxic relationship with a man who demeans you, you should break up with him before he succeeds in killing your joy.
23. He doesn’t show up for you like he used to
When you notice that he has started giving too many excuses for his absence and constant lack of support, you should be ready to cut him loose. No matter how busy or important his other obligations are, he can still create time to show up for you.
If these acts continue, he will ask you for a clean break someday without feeling remorseful.
24. He isn’t reluctant to let you know he’s chatting or talking with other girls
When a guy who didn’t use to chat so much with a girl starts to openly chat or talk with multiple girls, he is telling you he doesn’t care that you know he is cheating or about to cheat on you.
If he wants to patronize you, he will tell you they mean nothing to him or claim they are his buddies. Don’t be fooled, he is looking for your replacement.
25. He doesn’t put any effort into improving his looks or attitude around you
No matter how comfortable a couple gets with each other, each partner still tries to become better for the other. They’d both want to look good and do things to make the other person develop.
However, a man who doesn’t put any effort into becoming a better person or dresses shabbily in your presence either doesn’t respect you or he’s looking for reasons to break up with you.
26. It is obvious you’re the only one trying to make the relationship work
It takes two to tango and it takes both parties in a relationship to make the relationship work. If you’re the only one doing your best to make the relationship go on, the relationship will crumble in the end.
You can’t keep carrying the weight of making both of you happy and so, you should break up with him first or talk it out with him.
27. He is no longer bothered by things he used to get angry at you for
People don’t change their opinions or ideas with the snap of a finger, they probably just stopped caring. If your partner no longer calls you out on your bad habits, he doesn’t care about what your life turns out to be.
For instance, if he used to berate you for procrastinating but, now he doesn’t care if you get anything done, it’s a sign he can break up with you at any time.
Some of the signs your man will show when he wants to break up with you include: avoiding your calls, canceling dates, withdrawal of gifts and actions, and gradual or drastic switch from kind to detached.
He will turn to alcohol if he is the type to do that. He will stay away from unnecessary gatherings and stay depressed in his room. Some guys might cover up their hurt by having rebound sex or hooking up with different girls.
A breakup is final when your ex, who initiated the breakup, doesn’t reach out to you anymore. On your part, you’ll also stop having the desire to talk to the person. When you see each other, the pain of breaking up would have lessened too.
A man wants what he currently needs and, that could range from companionship to sex, to a serious relationship, or even mere friendship. Physical, intellectual and, emotional attractions can also play a huge role in deciding what a man wants in a woman.
He will change the password of his devices, end her call when you come in or, refuse to pick her call by saying it’s a wrong number. He will have cleared chats that if you track, will reveal that he’s been chatting with her for a while now.
All the signs you need to show you that your guy is planning to break with you are there but, you won’t see them unless you decide to. With the signs explained in this article, you should be able to make a decision ahead of your man if you’ll be strengthening the relationship or letting it go.
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As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.