Sometimes, men pull away, and it’s no big deal. We all need our space from one another – if we are in a real relationship – from time to time.
But what do you do when your man starts pulling away and acts as if a life with you is no longer fun? What are some good signs that you can watch for that mean he is testing you? Will he spend time with the boys more often?
These are great questions and deserve to be answered. After all, guys test girls from time to time, and we must be prepared for it.
Are tests a good thing, or should we be talking about ending things? Is a guy worth dating if he is playing games with your heart? How should you respond to tests or changes in behavior in a relationship?
In this article, we’ll look at the signs that your man might be testing you. Don’t just accept this behavior as normal! Your heart doesn’t deserve to be played with! Decide if he’s worth the trouble of all this before continuing the relationship. If he quits spending time with you and starts acting distant, you might need to call things off and find a man who cares!
- 1 Signs Your Man Is Testing You
- 1.1 1. He surprises you with something he knows you hate
- 1.2 2. He talks about beautiful famous women
- 1.3 3. He pretends not to hear your questions
- 1.4 4. He dares you to do something out of your comfort zone
- 1.5 5. He flirts with other women in front of you
- 1.6 6. He quits giving you compliments
- 1.7 7. He acts mysteriously
- 1.8 8. He insults you
- 1.9 9. He shows up at your place unannounced
- 1.10 10. He acts sarcastic all of a sudden
- 1.11 11. He quits returning your calls
- 1.12 12. He stops pursuing you
- 1.13 13. He pretends to be broke
- 1.14 14. He suddenly pulls away when you are affectionate
- 1.15 15. He starts playing hard to get
- 2 What To Do If He Is Testing You
- 3 FAQs
- 4 To Sum It All Up
Signs Your Man Is Testing You
1. He surprises you with something he knows you hate
You have night terrors and never watch scary movies because of it. However, your boyfriend decides to surprise you with a horror movie feast. What should you think about this? Did he truly just forget about your life-changing terrors? Some guys can be jerks, but they are usually not this insensitive.
If he’s truly changed into an insensitive boyfriend, he will likely not change his actions in the future. According to the Seattle Times, guys who are insensitive like this do not change. You need to determine if you can continue to put up with this insensitivity for the remainder of your relationship or if you should pursue a new guy!
2. He talks about beautiful famous women
Maybe your boyfriend has started talking about how gorgeous other women are. He might mention supermodels or famous actresses that the two of you know. This could be a test in your relationship to see if you will put up with this or not. If you find it completely obnoxious, you could let him know that you don’t like it one bit!
3. He pretends not to hear your questions
Relationships can be tough; dating, in general, is a hard thing to do. You might think that your boyfriend isn’t listening when really he is trying to test your patience. If you suspect this is the case, you can repeat your questions to see if he will react after a second round, or you can just drop the subject altogether. That may be the better option!
4. He dares you to do something out of your comfort zone
Some guys will test girls by daring them to eat something gross or do something outside of their comfort zone. If you are not an outdoorsy girl, he might want you to go hunting or fishing with him or expect you to kill a spider when that is the last thing in the world you want to do. Dating can be hard, as we often do things we don’t want, but testing sucks!
5. He flirts with other women in front of you
Flirting in front of you is very inappropriate. In fact, it’s just rude and not called for at all. If he flirts in front of you or pursues other relationships while on a date with you, you might consider breaking things off. No guy is worth the hassle of being disrespected like this, even if it is just a test. He shouldn’t be putting you through that.
6. He quits giving you compliments
Some boyfriends will give tests by being rude or unresponsive. Your boyfriend might stop giving you compliments or not respond when you ask for one. You can fish for one all day long, but the truth is, if he doesn’t want to give you one, he won’t give you one – fake or not. You might as well get to the bottom of the issue before this gets worse!
7. He acts mysteriously
If your boyfriend begins pulling away from you by acting mysterious, he might be giving you a test. Watch for shady behavior or actions that are out of character for this man. You might notice him being vague when you ask him questions, or he may act very moody from time to time. Actions like that are weird and unappreciated, in general!
8. He insults you
Some guys will be straight-up rude with you if they want to test you. They might say you look ugly or insult you in another way. You don’t have to put up with this for one second. Be sure to tell yourself that you are always beautiful and strong!
9. He shows up at your place unannounced
When a guy shows up unexpectedly, he might be trying to see if you are cheating on him. If you suspect your boyfriend is doing this because he thinks you are unfaithful, you should find out what’s changed in your relationship. Why does he suddenly think that you are seeing someone else? What brought on all of these suspicions?
10. He acts sarcastic all of a sudden
Sarcasm comes with the territory when you are dating a guy, but after a while, you should know your man. Does he normally act this way, or is this a change? Find out what’s triggered the sarcasm to get to the bottom of the problem.
11. He quits returning your calls
Your boyfriend might be sending you a test or a signal that he is no longer interested if he stops returning your calls. Find out which it is. If he’s testing you, determine what’s causing his insecurities about your relationship. If he’s wanting to call things off, end the relationship and find someone who will treat you right.
12. He stops pursuing you
There’s always the chance that your boyfriend is just giving you a test if he acts aloof like this all of a sudden. However, if he’s truly playing hard to get, you might have someone who wants out of the relationship, and you should break up with him!
13. He pretends to be broke
Some guys will test you by pretending to not have their wallet on a date. Why do they do this? They believe if you like them for who they are (not how much money is in their bank account), you will pay for the meal or activity and not expect them to do it.
14. He suddenly pulls away when you are affectionate
Has your boyfriend suddenly started pulling away when you try to be sweet and affectionate? He might be giving you a test! Watch for this sign!
15. He starts playing hard to get
Some boyfriends will play hard to get when they need to feel in control in the relationship or when they are worried they are going to be hurt by their girlfriend. This is not always the case, though. Sometimes, they will act aloof and hard to get because they want to challenge you. They wonder how much you truly like them.
The truth is their insecurities are playing out in nasty ways. They are acting childish by behaving like this, but it is common. Men will frequently do this to see how much you will actually put up with before putting your foot down. What is your tipping point? When will you put a stop to this? Make sure you stand up for yourself!
What To Do If He Is Testing You
If your man has started pulling away for no reason and you suspect he is playing games with your heart, you need to see why the trust is gone in your relationship. Why is he pulling away? Does he think you are cheating on him? There are a few things you can do if he starts pulling away and testing you like this, but you need to determine if he’s still into you, too!
One thing you can do is play the game right back. If he shows a lack of interest in you, you can reverse the roles and do the same to him. If he is truly testing you, he will have just walked into a minefield and have to find his way out of that one. He’ll likely be shocked at your behavior and have to quit acting the way he is. Things should turn around in your relationship.
If they don’t and he continues to go on with these games, you need to decide if he’s worth it. If he is, accept this new behavior ONLY if he wants to be in a relationship with you. The two of you may need to talk that one out. If you decide he’s not worth the trouble, go ahead and end the relationship. You don’t need a guy to mess with your heart like that! End the games!
Many men decide to test women for a very good reason – emotional manipulation. They want to be in control of the relationships and think tests are the way to achieve success. The real reason they are testing their women is they are insecure.
Testing a guy may seem like fun, but it’s really not. If you are worried he doesn’t care, you may not be a good fit after all. He should be SHOWING you that he cares by every action he takes! If he’s not doing that, he’s not that interested in you!
You can play hard to get with a guy to see if he’s super interested in you or not, but testing a guy is never cool. It means you are worried he might not be interested in dating you; if those insecurities are present in your relationship, move on!
If a guy tends to play it cool with you, you could always pull away to see what he does. If he shows a lot more interest in you after you pull away, he wants to be with you. Just don’t assume he is not interested in you if he’s really just shy!
If a guy is crazy about you, he will talk to you to show interest. If he treats you differently than his other female friends, you know he thinks about you a lot. If he plays hard to get, he might be trying to get your attention! Ask him out if you like him!
To Sum It All Up
Do you think guys test girls for a very cruel reason? Is pulling away a sign of a test? Are you in a serious relationship with a guy who is testing you? We’d love to hear all about it. We want to know about your love experiences! Please comment!
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.