When you meet a smart, sweet, funny and hot guy and you feel you have that special thing going on between the two of you the universe seems to move around only for you and your desires. But there's a catch: that guy has to like you back in order for this magic to work.
How to know if you like a guy is easy, as there is that tingle in the stomach and the dizziness and the fact you are lost when he looks at you and all, but you also have to be able to recognize if the guy likes you back.
Us, humans can easily see what we want to see instead of the reality and when it comes to relationships, you might trick yourself into believing the man you've just met actually likes you. But living in a fantasy and hoping he will show you signs that he is in love with you at one moment in time is not cool.
Just be objective and learn how to tell if he doesn't like you before you waste your precious time living a sweet, yet painful lie.
- 1 What Are The Signs That He Doesn't Like You
- 1.1 1. You are the one who initiates the conversations. Always!
- 1.2 2. He doesn't listen to you.
- 1.3 3. He is not bothered when you date other men.
- 1.4 4. He's not interested in physical contact.
- 1.5 5. He is always busy.
- 1.6 6. He can't remember things which are important for you.
- 1.7 7. He treats you the same way he treats other people in his life.
- 1.8 8. He is not interested when you do something special.
- 1.9 9. He doesn't notice when you are all dress up.
- 1.10 10. He is not there for you when you have a hard time.
- 1.11 11. He is not trying to impress you.
- 1.12 12. He flirts with other women too.
- 1.13 13. He doesn't share his feelings or thoughts with you.
- 1.14 14. He is not interested in what you like.
- 1.15 15. He mentions other women saying he would like to date them.
- 1.16 16. He doesn't care if you are in danger.
- 1.17 17. He doesn't offer his help.
- 1.18 18. You can't count on him for anything
- 1.19 19. He is only interested in having you between the sheets.
- 1.20 20. He is ghosting you.
- 1.21 21. You don't know his friends.
- 1.22 22. You question your relationship with him.
- 2 What Should You Do If He Doesn't Like You?
- 3 The Bottomline
What Are The Signs That He Doesn't Like You
1. You are the one who initiates the conversations. Always!
Communication is the key to a successful relationship and if you feel that he avoids talking to you, he's just not that into you. If you are the one who calls him, sends him texts and starts most of the conversations, he's letting you know that he's not interested in you.
The same thing is valid when the person is answering with short, closed phrases or single words, for example, “yes” or “no”. Even if he tells you that he's just not good at communicating in text or via phone, you should take a step back and analyze how often does he initiate a conversation. If the answer is not too often, you should move on.
2. He doesn't listen to you.
When a man doesn't listen to what you have to say, he's not interested in having a relationship with you. A person who likes someone wants to find out as much as possible about their crush, so they will listen to anything the other one is saying.
If the guy ignores you more than once when you talk about you, it's one of the signs he's doesn't like you and he is not interested in finding out who you are or what you like. One of the other signs he doesn't want a relationship with you is when he is always talking about him, his plans and his life, while cutting you short when you try to talk about you.
3. He is not bothered when you date other men.
When a man wants to date you, he is going to be jealous when other men are trying to hook up with you. One of the signs he doesn't like you is the lack of interest when another man approaches you. When the guy you like likes you back, he is going to be bothered by the idea of you dating other men, so you can try to drop this into the conversation and see how he reacts: if he has no reaction at all, he doesn't like you back.
A guy who likes a girl is going to have a reaction when she talks about seeing another man, no matter how discreet the reaction might be. A small dose of jealousy is normal in any relationship and it appears unconsciously as soon as there is any sign of competition. When a guy who wants to date you will notice other men giving you attention he will feel threatened and will try to protect you from them by making sure they know you are in a relationship with him.
4. He's not interested in physical contact.
When you like someone you try to stay close to them as much as possible, even steal a hug from time to time. Someone who is not interested in you will avoid physical contact and will probably react strange or be bothered if you try to hug them or touch them. Another way to know if they like you is to pay attention to their body language around you.
If he is trying to put something between him and you, like a bag, for example, he is not interested. Open, friendly body language is a sign the person is comfortable around you, while the opposite it's a sign they would rather be alone. Eye contact is also a good clue: if he likes you, he will try to make eye contact as much as possible, otherwise, he will try to look away from you.
5. He is always busy.
When someone doesn't like you, he will try to avoid you and one of the best ways to do this is to look busy all the time. If your crush always says he is busy doing something when you want to hang out with them or just talk to them, he doesn't like you.
The busier they are, the less interested they are in starting a relationship with you or going on a date. If you are the only one who makes plans for going out or spending time together, he doesn't like your company. Also, if he tends to put them off or cancels them in the last moment frequently, it's a bad sign. When a guy likes you he will do whatever he can to make time for you, no matter how busy he is.
6. He can't remember things which are important for you.
When you like someone you simply remember what is important for them, even small things, like what is their favorite brand of beer, because you want to know everything about them.
If your crush can't remember things that are important to you, like your birthday or what is your favorite pastime, they might not be into you. However, don't expect a man to remember your favorite shade of blush; men tend to forget such tiny details, but even so, when a man is interested in a woman, he will remember her birthday or important events in her life.
7. He treats you the same way he treats other people in his life.
When the man you like treats you the same way he treats his friends and other people in his life, he doesn't consider you to be special. This is one of the signs he doesn't love you. When you are special for someone, they will treat you differently, letting you know that you mean more than other friends. If your crush puts you on the same level with his friends, he's not into you.
8. He is not interested when you do something special.
One of the ways to make sure a man wants a relationship with you is his reaction when you achieve something, for example, you gain your degree in medicine or gain an important competition. His lack of interest in this type of important events in your life is a clear signal that he is not interested.
When a guy likes you, he will be just as excited for your success as you are, because he wants you to be happy and he values you. After all, the guy you like is going to be proud to have a successful partner by his side.
9. He doesn't notice when you are all dress up.
A man who likes a girl is always going to notice when she puts on a nice dress and makeup. One way to test your crush is by dressing up when you will see him. When a guy likes a girl he will notice the extra effort she puts in her looks when they meet, no matter how discreet her makeup or clothes are. If he gives you more attention than usual or makes a comment about your appearance, it's a sign the guy likes you.
10. He is not there for you when you have a hard time.
People are meat to stay together and couples are for better and for worse, so when he pays attention to your moods and comforts you when things get tough, he likes you.
If he ignores you or he is losing interest when you talk to him about what is wrong with you, the guy doesn't like you. When a guy likes you he will be there for you, even when things are not looking great, so if he avoids spending time with you, that's a big red flag.
11. He is not trying to impress you.
Men who like someone try to impress her, as a way to win her over with their best qualities. To do this they try to look brave, give you more attention, offer their help at any time and buy you gifts. When they like a girl, men are willing to go the extra mile to conquer her, so if he is not trying to impress you in any way, the guy doesn't like you.
12. He flirts with other women too.
Many men (and women) love to flirt and do it all the time. When your Prince Charming flirts with you pay attention to him around other women: if he flirts with them too, he is not into you.
There are moments when you can feel the chemistry, as he flirts with you, but some people do this as a way to interact with the opposite sex, not because they are interested in a relationship with the person in front of them. When such a man is interested in a woman he will flirt with her in a different manner, making sure she feels special, different from all the other women.
When the guy you like doesn't share his feelings with you, he doesn't want to let you in his life. The problem is most guys are reluctant to share their feelings with someone, so you need to make sure if he keeps you away because that's his way of doing things or because he is not interested in you.
When you like someone you naturally want to know everything about them, but sharing your intimate thoughts or feelings is not an easy thing, especially for a man. But if he likes you he will eventually open up to you, showing that he is investing in the relationship with the girl he likes.
If the guy doesn't like you as a girlfriend and doesn't see the potential for a relationship, he will only share general things, those you would already know by browsing his social media accounts.
14. He is not interested in what you like.
When you like someone you unconsciously start to like the same thing your crush likes because humans are wired to mimic the behavior of their loved ones. When the guy you like always seems to do the exact opposite of what you do, he doesn't like you back. You can notice this both from his words and his body language. When you talk to him he will admit he doesn't like the same music, movies, and other general things.
If he would have a crush on you, he would start to like the same band you like or, at least, a couple of songs you like. As for the body language, when you are together watch how he moves. If his movements mimic yours, for example, when you touch your leg, he also touches your leg, or, when you lean forwards, he does the same thing, he has a connection with you.
15. He mentions other women saying he would like to date them.
A man who is interested in a woman is not going to talk to her about dating other women, not because he doesn't want to upset her, but because he is not interested in other women and doesn't want to date someone else.
One of the signs he is not serious about you is talking about other women he wants to see and even asking your advice on how to relate with them. This means he is only interested in you as a friend, not a date. At the same time, he might be doing this to let you know he is not interested in a relationship with you and he doesn't like you as a girlfriend. Pay attention to how he talks about other women and how serious he looks about them; he might mention dating other women just to make you jealous, but if this is the case, he will only mention this lightly, to see your reaction.
16. He doesn't care if you are in danger.
A guy who likes a girl is going to protect her when she gets in trouble and nowadays there are plenty of situations when you can have problems. As a woman, a simple trip to the store can easily become delicate if a group of bullies decides to pick on you because you are alone. This is the perfect opportunity for your man to stand up for you and protect you. If he is not interested in you as a girlfriend, chances are he won't care if you are in danger.
Another common sign of an uninterested man is his lack of interest regarding your whereabouts. A person who is interested in someone always wants to know where his crush is and how they are doing. A man who doesn't ask you where you are and with whom, has no interest in you.
17. He doesn't offer his help.
Someone who likes you is always going to offer his help, even for the smallest things. One of the signs a man loves a woman is the fact he is always there for her, at any time, even if he has to postpone other tasks to be with her. Even if it means getting in trouble for you, the man who likes you back is going to jump headfirst in any situation.
Another way to tell when a man doesn't want a relationship with you is when he refuses to help you when you ask it due to his other assignments. A boyfriend would manage to help you, even if he has other important things to do. This is the normal reaction of someone who sees you as a special person in their life.
18. You can't count on him for anything
This one is very relevant, as it shows he is not able or willing to commit to you. Life is not all fun and games and you need someone who is consistent, who can show up on meetings and help you out when you are in need. Having to wonder if the man you like is going to show up to your date or if he is going to answer the phone when you are calling him for something serious is not a sign that he is into you.
Being reliable is important from the start of a relationship, as it shows the person is willing to make an effort and is not going to run away from responsibilities. When a guy likes a girl he is going to make himself available for her at all times, for anything – this is commitment.
19. He is only interested in having you between the sheets.
This one might seem strange, her it implies that he is interested in you, but there's a catch: if a guy only picks up when you call him for Netflix and chill, then he is not the one for you. When the man only calls you when he is feeling frisky, he doesn't like you, he is only using you for his own pleasure.
The easy way to see if he is only interested in having you between the sheets at his convenience is to ask him out for a pleasant evening with the clothes on. If he cancels or insists to go to his/your place, he is only interested in one thing from you and it's not because he likes you as a partner.
20. He is ghosting you.
Everything is perfect between the two of you, then he disappears for days, without any explanation and makes an appearance days or weeks later, picking everything up from where he left it. This one is a big red flag because it shows that he doesn't like you and that he is not serious about you.
In fact, men who tend to do this are usually interested in multiple women at the same time and love to play with them, without actually committing to one lady. If he sends you hot messages one day, then he is not available for several days on end, he is not serious about you, as he refuses to make an effort to secure the relationship.
21. You don't know his friends.
At the start of a relationship, you are eager to show off your new love interest to your friends, so you will present her or him to your friends. Some people are more cautious and they will only do this when they are sure of the relationship, so your guy might take his time to present you to his friends. But if he refuses to present you to his friends, it might be a sign he doesn't want them to learn about you. The reason for this could be that he has someone else or he is not serious about you.
22. You question your relationship with him.
When you find the perfect man everything will go easy and each gesture is going to come naturally. Sometimes you might think you've been together for ages because you can understand each other just by exchanging a couple of looks. But if you question your relationship with him, something is not right.
When the guy you like gives you mixed signs you might start wondering what is your place in his life or what type of relationship do you have with him. These are sometimes normal questions in a new relationship, but if you also notice other red flags, you need to step back and reconsider your options.
What Should You Do If He Doesn't Like You?
Life is not going as planned for most of us, so there are high chances you will stumble upon Prince Charming who doesn't like you back. No matter how many signs you give him, he's not into you. The best thing to do when you find yourself in this situation is to move on because the chances of making him like you are slim. Even if the guy will like you in the end, you need to occupy your time with something until he makes this realization.
One of the hurtful things we all do when we accept the fact our crush doesn't like us back is wondering why. There could be a lot of reasons and no one is to blame for the situation, so you need to learn how to move on. It's always easy to say this, but hard to do. Start with baby steps and put a distance between the two of you, even if your instinct is to stay as close to him as possible. You know the places where he spends his time, so avoid them, making sure you are not at the same place as him. The less you see him, he easier it will be to move on from him.
Be objective about the situation and stop thinking he will eventually fall for you. Ask yourself what made him great in your eyes and what qualities you saw in him that made you have a crush on him. Also, ask yourself what are the things you didn't like in him because these were the ones that made you incompatible.
The objective answers to these questions are going to lead you to the conclusion he was the perfect partner for you. Focus on you and your needs, embracing your emotions and allowing yourself to move on from the guy who was not into you. This will make you available for the man who is going to be your true love and partner in life.
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.