Two people in love understand that relationships come with making mistakes and both parties should be ready to either forgive and move on or walk away from everything they’ve built together.
However, as a woman, it is easier to hold a conversation about forgiveness than it is to forgive. Knowing the gravity to place on each mistake your guy makes will help you know how soon you should forgive him or if you should hold out on doing so at all.
Also, the saying ‘Forgiving someone is more for you than them’ is true. This is because whether they continue to exist in your life or not, harboring bitterness over how they hurt you is not good for you. Nevertheless, you can decide not to forgive the man you love. However, by not forgiving him, you’ll likely live with the bad emotions that will arise.
On that note, it helps to ask yourself; Is there an unforgivable offense that anyone, including your boyfriend, can commit? If yes, what do you think that is? If not, what do you think your man can do to secure your forgiveness, so the both of you can move past that incident?
No doubt, it can be hard placing gravity on the bad behavior of the man you love, and that is why this article will take away the difficult decision of doing that. Below are some mistakes that you can forgive your man for.
- 1 11 Things You Can Forgive Him For
- 1.1 1. Ignorance of something he did
- 1.2 2. Stepping over set boundaries
- 1.3 3. Standing you up on a date
- 1.4 4. Inability to understand your unspoken needs
- 1.5 5. Acting overprotective
- 1.6 6. Inability to prioritize self-care
- 1.7 7. Not meeting up with your family reunion
- 1.8 8. When he realizes his errors and apologizes
- 1.9 9. Asking you insensitive questions to understand you.
- 1.10 10. Assuming what you need instead of asking
- 1.11 11. Inability to love you anymore
- 2 FAQs
- 3 To Sum Up
11 Things You Can Forgive Him For
1. Ignorance of something he did
One of the things that your man would do might be to unknowingly offend you; through what he says, how he acts, or his reaction to something you do. Ignorance is not an offense even if the action from it hurts you. And so, you should be able to forgive your man if he acts out of ignorance in your relationship.
For example, if your man throws away an old-looking and twisted wig of yours thinking you wanted to thrash it, but you get mad at him because you actually wanted to revamp the hair. He thought he did the right thing, but he just cost you a good wig that just needed a good brushing and washing.
It’s only wise that you forgive him. Give him the chance to make it up to you by buying a new one. However, if you have a grudge and refuse to forgive him, the incident will cause a strain in your relationship.
2. Stepping over set boundaries
Boundaries in relationships exist for different reasons, one of which is to preserve respect, thereby limiting the occurrence of errors both parties might make. When your guy steps over the boundaries both of you set, it will rub you the wrong way and probably lead to disagreements.
A man who loves you will recognize his error and see the need to talk about fixing what he has done wrong. Forgiving him for that slip-up will ensure peace is quickly restored in your relationship. Not forgiving him means being hypocritical because you could also fall into the same error.
3. Standing you up on a date
One of the most embarrassing things a man can do to a woman is to stand her up on a date night. Did your boyfriend fail to show up to your date after looking forward to seeing him and spending some quality time with him over good food? Did you feel rejected, unwanted, and embarrassed sitting all alone at the table for two? That must have hurt you so badly.
However, before you make a rash decision to break up with him for this unacceptable behavior, give him a chance to explain. Forgiveness includes hearing the other person out so you know why they acted that way. After listening to his point of view, you might realize that he didn’t mean to intentionally embarrass you.
4. Inability to understand your unspoken needs
People say that you should know your partner in and out and that if your relationship is not yet at this stage, both of you aren’t meant to be. However, that is not always the case because it can take forever for even a husband to understand his wife in a marriage.
As such, it is unfair to assume that people unbounded by marriage will fully understand each other without saying a word.
While it is expected that your guy will know some things about you without any verification, it is not fair to him if you walk away from the relationship because he couldn’t guess what you wanted or were thinking. As such, forgive him when he falls short of the high standard you’ve set for him in your relationship.
5. Acting overprotective
Another thing your man can do that can cause a problem is to act overprotective towards you. Most men feel they have to protect their women, and while a woman loves this show of power to an extent, she considers it a problem if she doesn’t have a sense of independence without feeling like a chick in need of protection from the mother hen.
While you might get frustrated with your man for acting all macho, you should also forgive him because he feels that’s one of the best ways to show he cares.
6. Inability to prioritize self-care
Women mostly understand that self-care is important, especially if they will be assuming responsibility for a family someday. As such, they tend to take care of themselves without external reminders. However, no woman wants to have to take care of her man like she would her baby, which is why you can easily get mad at your man for not taking care of himself.
Instead of getting short with him all the time, forgive him for not seeing the importance of self-care, and take time to explain to him why it is vital to you and the future of your relationship.
7. Not meeting up with your family reunion
Your family is important to you. So, it can be infuriating when your man doesn’t show up for a family meeting or reunion where everyone else is coming with their partners.
If your man calls you ahead that he cannot make it to the meetup, you’ll be pissed off, but at least better armed to answer questions. However, if he doesn’t inform you at all, forgiving him becomes more difficult. Again, hear him out before concluding he doesn’t care about your family.
8. When he realizes his errors and apologizes
There’s nothing a woman likes more than when her man recognizes that he was wrong and immediately apologizes for his behavior. While his apology doesn’t excuse his behavior, it shows he is remorseful and didn’t mean to hurt you. Even if you can’t forgive him immediately, it will be easier for you to do so when you’re ready.
9. Asking you insensitive questions to understand you.
Sometimes, in the course of getting to know each other, your man can be clueless and ask insensitive questions. For example, he might ask you how many men you’ve slept with because you asked him something related to his ex. If you aren’t comfortable with answering such a question, you might get offended. Simply correct him and forgive him for his error.
10. Assuming what you need instead of asking
In romantic relationships, some men think it is okay to do things for their women based on assumptions. However, they end up apologizing because their gestures embarrass or hurt their women. Did your man think it was romantic to order a dish that contains ingredients you’re allergic to? Forgive him and ask him to confirm what you like next time.
11. Inability to love you anymore
A time might come when your man won’t love you with the same intensity he once did. This would hurt you so much. This difference will show in the ways he acts towards you, or the ways he touches you. His purpose for being with you would have changed and you will notice it.
Rather than let your bitterness at this development fester, learn whatever lesson the situation had to teach you. Forgive him, see if both of you can work towards loving each other again, or walk away if that’s the best option for you.
Before deciding to forgive him and continue with the relationship, ask yourself, “Does he regret his actions, and will he avoid doing the same thing again?.’’ If yes, you may forgive him. If no, forgive him but consider walking away from him.
Think about all their redeemable qualities and how they’ve been good towards you. Focusing on the good can help you forgive them for their errors and move on with loving them.
Forgiveness is necessary if you’re to move forward with your life or continue relationships. Forgiveness also relieves you of the heartache you got from an occurrence even if things don’t go back to normal as in the beginning.
You can forgive everything in a relationship, but some things will mean putting an end to the relationship even if you forgive the other person.
Get confirmation from him that he won’t deliberately hurt you again, and ensure he shows obvious signs of changing before believing or forgiving him.
To Sum Up
The idea of forgiveness is relative because forgiving someone can mean just letting their error slide and allowing them back into your life or letting them go even though you’ve let go of the grudge you hold against them. The gravity of their offense is what determines if you forgive and accept them back, or you forgive and say goodbye to them.
Hopefully, this post has helped you understand which situations you can easily forgive your man and allow him back in your life. Please leave a comment on how this post helped and share it with someone else who should see it too.
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.