Is your partner acting strange? Do you doubt their intentions towards you? Are you finding it hard to trust them?
If yes, then they might be hiding something serious from you. Some men tend to have ulterior motives when meeting women. Therefore, it’s up to you to protect yourself and get to the bottom of the situation.
There are some signs you should look out for to help you identify when you’re dealing with shady dudes. Specifically, if you want to date them, it’s best to be cautious about these factors.
Thankfully, we have everything listed down below. Here are twenty-seven things you shouldn’t neglect when you meet someone.
- 1 27 Things Shady Guys Do
- 1.1 1. He fakes intimacy too early
- 1.2 2. He’s not committed
- 1.3 3. He’s still talking to other people
- 1.4 4. He has a bad report
- 1.5 5. He’s a ghost
- 1.6 6. He talks about his failed relationships
- 1.7 7. You’ve caught him in several lies
- 1.8 8. His friends are also strange
- 1.9 9. He doesn’t want you to meet his friends
- 1.10 10. He seems too good to be true
- 1.11 11. He categorizes women as the same
- 1.12 12. He disappears on you
- 1.13 13. He doesn't care if you talk to other men
- 1.14 14. He never officially takes you out
- 1.15 15. He never takes any financial responsibility
- 1.16 16. He’s a master of flattery
- 1.17 17. He hides his phone
- 1.18 18. Your friends don’t like him
- 1.19 19. He doesn’t make plans with you
- 1.20 20. His behavior often changes
- 1.21 21. He’s always in need
- 1.22 22. He makes condescending jokes
- 1.23 23. He has absurd principles
- 1.24 24. He never wants to share his daily activities
- 1.25 25. He has many female friends
- 1.26 26. He’s selfish in bed
- 1.27 27. You feel it in your gut
- 2 FAQs
- 3 Conclusion
27 Things Shady Guys Do
1. He fakes intimacy too early
One of the things you should be cautious about is men that put up a false impression of intimacy. For example, when a guy starts calling you ‘baby’ or ‘honey’ two weeks into the relationship, without ever referring to your name.
This behavior shows that he doesn’t care about your distinct personality, but the idea of seeing you. More so, he might not be fully interested in you, and might only want to date for personal benefits. Specifically, he’ll want you to feel a sense of closeness to him so that he can get what he wants.
Understand that it’s not normal for a male to give you pet names too early into the relationship. It might hint at something fishy.
2. He’s not committed
The best way to detect a dishonest guy is through his actions. If he’s inconsistent, it shows he’s not interested in having something serious with you. For example, if he seems dedicated to spending time with you and building the relationship, but suddenly becomes busy and disappears for a strange amount of time, it’s a suspicious act.
If he won’t pick up his phone calls during that period, or fails to talk to you, you should be aware that he’s not ready for anything severe. It's even worse if his stories don’t add up, and you’re starting to doubt him. This means that he’s indeed being dishonest and you should walk away as soon as possible.
3. He’s still talking to other people
If you find out that a guy is on several dating sites and he claims he wants something serious with you, be aware that this behavior is fishy. If anyone truly wants to be with you, they’ll make efforts to prove it to you.
More so, they won’t pretend to want to be exclusive when they are still keeping their options open. They'll rather be honest about desiring an open relationship than lie to you to gain affection.
This behavior is one thing you shouldn’t excuse. The truth is, if a guy lies about seeing other people, they’ll most likely keep lying throughout the relationship. They’ll believe you’re gullible and would use it against you.
4. He has a bad report
A great way to spot a fishy guy is by observing the type of reputation he has. If most people don’t have amazing things to say about him, it proves he’s not as awesome as he tries to make you believe. More so, there’s a likelihood that he’ll repeat those bad deeds with you.
Understand that if a man tries to conceal his past more than he acknowledges and takes responsibility for it, there’s a chance he’s going to play you. Never believe that you can change his bad behavior. No matter how perfect you are, a dishonest person will always remain dishonest. Changing is a personal decision, and most times never depends on external factors.
5. He’s a ghost
Quite different from the previous point, you’ll know you’re dealing with someone suspicious when he has no report at all. He doesn’t seem to have any social media accounts, nor does anyone know any specific details about him. If it feels like he dropped out of the sky, it’s something you should look into.
Understand that everyone has a past. If you can’t find out anything about a person’s history, it means they might have something suspicious to hide. More so, if they’re not willing to have a conversation about the subject, then things are indeed fishy. You shouldn’t consider dating that person, or you might be bewildered at the truth later on.
6. He talks about his failed relationships
Suspicious guys will always try to make you empathetic about their failed dating life. They’ll subconsciously make you accustomed to the thought of their shortcomings while making you want to put in more effort to see things work. Therefore, if a male individual always brings up an unfortunate event from his previous relationship, it’s a bad sign.
Anyone that’s fully interested in you will focus more on the present than the past. Even so, they’ll want to build a future with you instead of guilt-tripping you into believing you have to date them for a reason. If a guy uses this tactic on you, you should simply walk away.
7. You’ve caught him in several lies
You can excuse a guy’s dishonesty once, but a recurrence of that behavior is something you should be mindful of. If he always seems to have a story to tell, it’s rather suspicious. He doesn’t accept his faults until you provide evidence of his bad behavior. It means he’ll keep being dishonest as long as you can’t discover the truth.
Understand that you can’t keep up with a dishonest man. He’ll always have a lie to tell to make you believe him again. The more you fall for his sweet words, the more you’ll regret your decisions later.
8. His friends are also strange
It’s easy to catch a fishy guy when his friends are also suspicious. If they act indifferent or are unwilling to form a bond with you, it’s something to be mindful of. It could mean that they’re tired of repeating the same process with several different people.
Even so, if you observe that they’re overly friendly with you, and don’t even try to build a friendship first, it could mean that they’re trying to convince you to have sex with their friend. It’s always crucial to analyze their behavior to understand the scenario even better. If something doesn’t add up, it could mean they’re being dishonest.
9. He doesn’t want you to meet his friends
When a male seems to be hiding you from the world, it’s a big suspicion. If he doesn’t want you to meet his friends, family, or the people closest to you, you should be careful about taking things any further. If a man is interested in you, he should introduce you to at least one person he considers a friend. If he fails to do this, something is indeed fishy.
Even so, if he doesn’t want to meet your friends, it means he’s hiding something. Anyone who wants a serious relationship with you wouldn’t be too busy or tired to talk to your friends. They’ll be eager to make you a part of their life.
10. He seems too good to be true
Another suspicious category of men is the one that seems too good to be true. If you can’t point out a flaw in your date, it’s something to worry about. One thing you should understand is that no one is perfect. There must be something off about a person to make them human. If you can’t spot any errors, it means they’re intentionally creating that impression to hide something.
If they’re never too tired to make phone calls, or always enjoy talking to you, it can be fishy. This is especially true if they always seem to say what you want to hear. It shows they are trying too hard to win you over, which is something to be careful about.
11. He categorizes women as the same
A severe red flag you shouldn’t excuse from a guy is when he classifies ladies with the same titles. For example, all women are materialistic, or you can never find a woman that will love you for who you are. Such statements reveal the type of mindset the man has. More so, it showcases how he also sees you.
Peradventure he later flatters you that you’re not like the rest, you should be suspicious. If he has a serious impression about women, there’s a likelihood your actions won’t magically change his mind. It also shows he’s not genuinely interested in you, but only what you can offer him.
12. He disappears on you
If a man suddenly leaves you in the middle of dinner to answer a call in the bathroom, it shows he’s hiding something. Even so, if he always wants to leave an occasion early, it should raise suspicion. There should be a good amount of transparency with the person you’re dating. If a man’s behavior shows that he has a separate life, you should be careful around him.
You can confirm that something is fishy if he’s always dismissive or easily provoked when you bring up his behavior. If he’s not willing to share certain details about his life, you shouldn’t proceed with the relationship. Else, he’d keep lying to you until things get out of control.
13. He doesn't care if you talk to other men
Another fishy behavior you shouldn’t neglect from a guy is if he indirectly suggests having an open relationship. If he’s not bothered that you talk to other men, it proves he’s not ready for anything serious. He might use your actions to justify his desire to philander. If you don’t react to his indirect proposal early, you might end up in a difficult situation soon after.
The only reason you should continue seeing a guy that wants a casual relationship is if you merely want to have fun. On the contrary, you shouldn’t stay with him if you’re looking for something serious. Else, he might break your heart.
14. He never officially takes you out
If a guy isn’t interested in building something profound with you, he’ll be less committed to making things work. Therefore, things like taking you out will be difficult for him. He’ll opt for cheaper and more sustainable options like late-night events or ordering take-outs on an important date. He’ll rather spend time at home with you than do anything fancy.
This behavior occurs because he’s not willing to invest in the relationship, mostly because he doesn’t want it to work. If you observe such patterns from a man, it’s best to walk away, anyone that values you will put in the time and effort to make you happy.
15. He never takes any financial responsibility
Another way you can spot a fishy guy is when he never takes financial responsibility for anything. For the most part, he always wants you to handle everything. Such a man gives regular excuses like, he forgot his wallet, or that he’s expecting a payment and you should handle the payments.
More so, this type of guy would find it difficult to pay for your meals whenever the both of you go on a date. Instead, he’ll suggest that both of you split the bill, or that you handle everything. Although it’s great to be sympathetic to his situation, never allow it to deceive you.
16. He’s a master of flattery
If a man seems to know what to say to get your attention, you should be careful around him. In most cases, this is a sign that he’s a master of flattery. Even so, it suggests that he knows how to swoon women to get what he wants. Therefore, you should become suspicious if he knows how to make you forget about his late-night outings or bathroom calls.
The best way to handle such a man is to prevent his words from swaying you. If you’re displeased with his behavior, talk to him about it, without letting his flattery get to you. It’s the best way to make him show his true colors.
17. He hides his phone
Another easy way to identify a suspicious man is when his phone is always inaccessible. He makes fishy calls and covers the screen anytime you’re around. Even so, he never lets you touch his phone, nor do you know his password. If there’s no iota of transparency between you and him, it’s something you should be mindful of.
Talking about the situation is the best way to get to the bottom of things. You should also observe how he reacts. If he’s suddenly shocked or uneasy, it means he’s indeed holding something. No one should lose their cool merely because of a conversation on a phone.
18. Your friends don’t like him
If you have feelings for someone, it might be hard for you to detect their shady behaviors soon. Therefore, your trusted friends can be of great use. Specifically, if you’re confused about the man you’re seeing, you should pay attention to what your friends say about him. Do they like the way he treats you? Or are they skeptical about a lot of things?
If they have several opinions about his integrity, you should pay attention to them. They could be seeing something you’re not. This process can play a crucial role in your journey to discovering if they are being genuine or dishonest.
19. He doesn’t make plans with you
When someone isn’t keenly interested in you, you’ll notice how hard it is for them to plan the future with you. Therefore, they’ll want to focus more on the present than on making any plans with you.
If you detect this type of behavior in the man you’re seeing, it might indicate that you need to move on. The more you hang on to something that isn’t working, the more things start to fall apart.
If his intentions aren’t genuine, understand that he won’t suddenly start paying attention to you later on. Therefore, it’s best to leave in the middle of the relationship than wait for things to get worse.
20. His behavior often changes
When people put up a persona, it can be hard for them to keep up with it. Therefore, one of the things you’ll observe about a suspicious man is that his behavior often changes. AT one point, he seems like a charming individual while at another point, he’s acting super distant. You’ll observe how hard it is for him to keep up with his moods.
Whenever this situation arises, it’s always best to talk about it. Try to hear his opinion about the subject. If it sounds even more suspicious, and nothing seems to add up, then you’ll have your answers.
21. He’s always in need
Another shady behavior that men exhibit is if they always have a financial need. More so, they always have a story to tell about how they ran into a sudden financial challenge. Understand that this behavior is extremely fishy. More so, you shouldn’t be with someone who doesn’t have their finances sorted out, even to the least.
If you regularly loan this man money, it might indicate that he’s deceiving you. More so, f he hardly repays the loans, you should be careful around this person. Such people have calculated motives and would do anything to get your money.
22. He makes condescending jokes
This behavior might occur when he’s struggling to keep up with his character. Even though he tells you how beautiful you are, he can still go ahead to make condescending jokes about how fat you look. If you hear such statements, understand that it’s extremely suspicious.
No one should have two opinions about your physical beauty except if they were dishonest in the first place. You shouldn’t get too confused if this happens. Bear in mind that he just revealed how he genuinely thinks about you. It’s then up to you to decide if you want to hang on to that type of relationship.
23. He has absurd principles
Another way to spot a shady man is when he has absurd principles that he can’t explain to you. For example, “I don’t eat at restaurants at night!” or “I can’t go out on Fridays!” If it doesn’t sound plausible, then you know he’s hiding something. He might be telling you these things to prevent you from finding out about the other life he has.
Refusing to succumb to his claims is the best way to gain control of the situation. He might try to guilt-trip you into accepting his principles. But the more you believe it, the more the deception continues.
Guys that prefer to keep the information of their whereabouts or their daily activities private are usually dishonest about something. They also prefer late-night activities because they seem to be preoccupied during most of the day. If they’re uneasy with talking about their life, it’s a hit that something is fishy.
You should try to find out the truth from him. If he fails to share, then you should move on. Understand that you shouldn’t date someone that’s keeping a part of their life hidden from you.
25. He has many female friends
Another shady behavior you might see from a suspicious man is if he has far too many female friends. You might also hear things like, “They’re always after me. I don’t know why it happens.” If this scenario occurs, understand that your man is being dishonest to you. If girls flock around him, it’s usually because he instigated it.
He’ll want you to believe that he’s innocent about the matter, whereas, he could be a major flirt. If you can’t get to the bottom of why he associates with so many females, you should consider moving on from the relationship. Such men have a habit of wooing women for their benefit.
26. He’s selfish in bed
You can tell when something is fishy with a man when he behaves selfishly at night. Peradventure you have sex with him, he’ll always want things to go his way. He might even have illogical principles that he has to abide by during sex. He’ll want to focus more on finding pleasure than satisfying you.
These are some of the behaviors that he might exhibit. Nonetheless, if you feel something is off during sex, you’ll attest that he’s not a trustworthy person. Thereafter, it would be best to move on before things get out of control.
27. You feel it in your gut
Most ladies can tell when a guy is acting strange because they can feel it in their gut. A combination of actions the guy displays might make them feel this way, but nothing in particular. For example, if he goes to the bathroom anytime he wants to make a call, or if he only takes you out at night. This type of behavior indicates he's indeed hiding something.
Dating guys like these never end well. He might try to appease you with great sex, but you should never fall for his coys. If he’s being dishonest from the onset, be rest assured that it won’t get better over time. It’s much better to walk away and find someone better.
When something is fishy about a man, it usually means he’s being dishonest to his significant other. Such a man will be hiding something severe while pretending to be perfect in the eyes of his partner. Most people engage in this act for personal gain, or to get maximum control in a relationship.
If someone is being dishonest with you, their behavior will simply be off. Firstly, they’d feign intimacy too soon, and start calling you ‘baby’. They’d also have sudden financial needs more frequently than any average person. More so, they’d suddenly disappear on you when you need them the most.
If your partner is hiding something, they’d hate the thought of you touching their phone. This behavior shows that they’re not interested in having a committed, transparent relationship with you. If you speak to your partner about it and he refuses to change, it might be time to let him go.
If you feel a man is living a double life, you shouldn’t believe anything he says. Transparency and honesty are some of the core factors that keep a relationship standing. If he can’t respect these factors, then things are likely to fall apart with time.
If someone has conflicting behavior and tries too hard to impress you, it hints that they’re being sneaky. People like these tend to lose their cool when you discover their patterns or find out their secrets. It’s best not to associate yourself with them.
Did you enjoy this article? Understand that it’s usually better to walk away from a sneaky person. We all hate shady men and trying to possibly make them honest with you might cause more damage than good. Kindly leave a comment below if you liked this article or share it with others.
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.