Personal hygiene is an essential aspect of living and is critical for the success of any relationship. If two individuals can't agree on the best sanitary practices, they will inevitably encounter problems along the way.
This scenario is alarming when it's with a significant other. If a partner can't shower or brush their teeth and is comfortable living with a smell, their significant other will be uncomfortable in the relationship.
Therefore, if your dilemma is, “My boyfriend has bad hygiene,” and you're seeking possible solutions, we have the perfect guide for you.
This article lays down twenty-three thoughtful things to do when your boyfriend has disgusting routines. More so, it will give you insight on the possible causes, with in-depth revelation on how to help him overcome these practices and embrace hygiene in the relationship.
- 1 23 Things To Do When Your Boyfriend Has Bad Hygiene
- 1.1 1. Agree to discuss
- 1.2 2. Realize that there are many possible causes
- 1.3 3. Schedule a time to discuss the problem
- 1.4 4. Point out the issues
- 1.5 5. Ask him why
- 1.6 6. Let him know you care
- 1.7 7. Ask if he's okay
- 1.8 8. Ask if he needs your help
- 1.9 9. Offer to help
- 1.10 10. Be a little tough on him
- 1.11 11. Take playful approaches
- 1.12 12. Seek external help
- 1.13 13. Don't beat around the bush
- 1.14 14. Give him time
- 1.15 15. Keep the situation private
- 1.16 16. Don't ask friends or colleagues for help
- 1.17 17. Give subtle reminders
- 1.18 18. Spare the mishaps
- 1.19 19. Try not to nag
- 1.20 20. Help him see the benefits
- 1.21 21. Compliment him
- 1.22 22. Try new products
- 1.23 23. Consider your priorities
- 2 FAQs
- 3 In Summary
23 Things To Do When Your Boyfriend Has Bad Hygiene
1. Agree to discuss
Many people with partners that have personal hygiene problems expect situations to change without outright addressing them. We can understand this dilemma because it can be cringeworthy to tell someone they smell or can't take care of themselves properly.
The mere thought of hurting someone's feelings keeps many from opening up about these subjects. However, it's essential to acknowledge the importance of talking about the issue if you want things to change. Your partner may not understand the severity of the situation until you agree to address it.
If his behavior could lead to more issues in the relationship, it's only mandatory to schedule a time to talk about the situation.
2. Realize that there are many possible causes
It's easy to assume that your boyfriend's uncleanliness is an apparent decision he made and that he merely doesn't regard hygiene. However, it's essential to understand that there are several reasons why a person would have problems with their personal sanitariness.
It could hint at depression, frustration, anger, overwhelmingness, or issues with their mental health. Opening up your mind to possible causes for your partner's behavior will help you stay flexible when discussing the situation with him.
Nonetheless, hold on to the possibility that your significant other is simply messy and might not see a problem with forgetting to wash up before heading out.
3. Schedule a time to discuss the problem
If you're saying, “My boyfriend has bad hygiene,” and you aim to get to the bottom of things, bringing up this subject at the right time is critical. If you tend to make statements about your partner's cleanliness anytime it pops up; it will sound more like complaints than careful communication. Therefore, intentionally bringing up the topic and strategic times is essential.
You can schedule a time to discuss with your partner or use communication methods your partner will understand the most. You can also choose to be spontaneous while bringing up the topic, but ensure your approach is more loving than derogatory.
4. Point out the issues
Talking about the behaviors you dislike in your relationship can help you and your partner settle your differences. Likewise, bringing up the specific issues with your partner's sanitariness can help you get to the bottom of things.
For example, if your significant other doesn't take showers after work, you can point this out. This act will help your partner stay self-conscious about his decisions. If he tends to have stinky breath, don't feel ashamed to bring this up. The more you point it out is, the more he stays notified of it.
However, ensure you don't become overbearing with your statements, or it will feel more like criticism. Try to be subtle enough to pass across the information.
5. Ask him why
If you've spoken to your boyfriend about his unclean behaviors, but nothing has improved, you need to change your tactics. Instead of pointing out his flaws, ask him why he chose to act that way. For example, if he regularly fails to brush, ask him why he forgets to take care of his teeth or generally doesn't practice oral cleanliness.
This form of communication will help you understand your partner better while creating room for effective communication. Your partner will sense that you're genuinely concerned about his behaviors, which can be more welcoming than outright pointing out his flaws. It's also an effective way to make him stay alert to the decisions he makes.
6. Let him know you care
If you decide to point out your partner's behaviors or outright ask him about them, it's essential to express how much you care first. This move helps your significant other warm up to you and softens the blow of revealing his unclean attitudes. Please don't start the conversation without establishing this ground, or he'll be unwilling to discuss the next time.
Being empathic in your relationship will help you achieve more results irrespective of how aggravating circumstances are at that moment. Therefore, if your partner's feet smell due to lack of care, mention how concerned you are about it. You can expect him to embrace your statements better this way.
7. Ask if he's okay
As explained earlier, negative hygiene habits are often a reflection of some emotional or mental health problems. Therefore, asking your partner about his well-being can give insight into his behaviors.
Instead of outright bringing up his uncleanliness, you can say something like, “I noticed you didn't wash yourself today, is everything okay? Are you feeling well?” This act shows empathy, which your partner might warm up too quickly.
However, don't expect to get the answers you're looking for immediately. Your significant other may not even be aware of his emotional or mental health issues. Nonetheless, asking such questions will help him meditate and see if your claims are possible causes.
8. Ask if he needs your help
Sometimes, partners dealing with emotional problems have a hard time coping with simple tasks. If your significant other is stressed out, he may neglect some necessary steps to cleanliness. Asking if he needs your help can be an immediate resolution to the situation. It may also help him realize the cause of his problems.
However, your approach to this point is critical. Offering to help a grown man brush his teeth might seem demeaning, so you have to employ intuitive tactics. Mention how you've noticed he's been stressed at work lately, and ask if he needs help with anything. He may accept or decline your support, which is why the next point is crucial.
9. Offer to help
There's a difference between asking your partner if he needs your help with specific tasks and outright offering help. Your partner might be too ashamed to accept service on minor tasks, which is why this point is essential. Instead of feeling defeated, you have to include yourself in his daily cleaning routines subtly.
This step is vital if you feel your boyfriend is facing emotional or mental health problems. However, if he's merely lazy, you will need to employ other tactics.
Some intuitive ways to help your struggling partner without making it obvious are hiding under the guise of pampering him. Offer to shower him lovingly or to clean his mouth if he goes without brushing his teeth again.
10. Be a little tough on him
If you're confident that your partner has a carefree attitude about his hygiene, then being a little tough on him can help him change. For example, refusing to kiss him when he has bad breath might make him more willing to clean his mouth regularly.
This tactic should only be engaged when you're sure your partner is hesitant to practice cleanliness because he doesn't see its importance.
However, try not to go too far with these measures, or you might push him away ultimately. Be warm enough to make him understand the essence of cleanliness or make casual jokes about it. Don't make a rule that you won't kiss him if he doesn't take regular showers.
11. Take playful approaches
To summarize the previous point, it's critical to be playful with your boyfriend on the subject of his sanitariness to avoid disrespecting him. Talking about someone's personal cleanliness will mostly sound demeaning. Therefore, being playful will help you maintain harmony in your relationship.
You can choose to include him in your daily grooming, which would indirectly help him break the cycle of nasty sanitary practices. For example, mention taking a shower together instead of outright saying that you think he should take one. The more you involve him in compassionate ways is, the more he might be willing to change.
12. Seek external help
An alternate way you can offer to help your partner is by seeking support from external sources. If he attests that his unclean behaviors are linked to his mental health, many mental health resources can assist him on his journey.
Accompanying him to visit a professional is a way to show your support in the relationship. Try not to be confrontational, demanding, or too controlling about the situation. Give your significant other time to warm up to the idea of getting help. More so, please don't make assumptions about how they feel. Be comfortable with how much or little they share per time.
13. Don't beat around the bush
There are many ways to make your partner see that he has unclean behavior. However, it's essential not to beat around the bush when engaging those tactics. It would help if you always tried to be direct without hurting your significant other's feelings. But deliberately being unclear will crush his ego more than you imagine.
He'll perceive that you're referring to his filthy behaviors, which will be more demeaning than you realize. Therefore, striking a balance in your communication is essential to get past the situation. Be firm but not too demanding and persuasive. More so, aim to be vague but don't necessarily beat around the bush to avoid pissing your partner off.
14. Give him time
It will take time for a person to adapt to sanitary practices, primarily when used to living otherwise. Therefore, giving your partner time to learn is necessary.
He may start impressing you by showering regularly but may fall back and forget to shower at all. In such a scenario, it's crucial to give him space to get accustomed to these activities before concluding the matter.
Don't have sudden expectations that he'll change the moment you point out his behaviors. Your partner will undoubtedly be taken back by the mere fact you pointed out his filthy behaviors. Therefore, putting him under pressure to change will only worsen the situation and make him feel too constrained to make efforts.
15. Keep the situation private
Your partner's personal hygiene is something you shouldn't talk about with a third party. Unless the person is offering professional help, it's critical to keep the issue private. The reason for this act is to prevent painting a negative impression about your partner to others. It will be easy for you to forget and move on after your partner adapts, but others might not forget.
The situation may not be serious, but protecting the relationship should be a critical step, especially if it's a long-term one. You can obtain advice from reputable sources, but ensure you don't merely mention your partner's negative hygiene for the fun of it.
16. Don't ask friends or colleagues for help
Like the previous point, it's essential to protect your partner's image, especially if you're in a long-term relationship with him. One critical step to take is avoiding talking to friends or colleagues about his negative hygiene. If you're not seeking professional help, then avoid bringing up the discussion.
You should avoid asking them to help you out, especially if they have no expertise on the matter. Your boyfriend shouldn't have to find out about his bad habits from associates. Including them will only bring misunderstanding and disunity to your relationship. Therefore, it's wise to keep such information to yourself.
17. Give subtle reminders
As your partner becomes more self-conscious about sanitary practices, he'll need your help along the way. Subtly reminding him to do some activities is the best way to go about it. Instead of getting worked up about his learning pace, call his attention to some behaviors when necessary. His willingness to make corrections will surprise you.
For instance, if he's rushing out of the house without cleaning his teeth, you can make a kind gesture to remind him about it. If he senses that you genuinely care about him having bad breath all day, he'll unhesitantly pay attention to your cues.
18. Spare the mishaps
Your reaction to any of your partner's decline in hygiene habits will affect his motivation to get better. Therefore, this step is exceedingly crucial. If you respond well when he neglects his hygiene after a while, he'll notice and strive to improve. However, if you react badly by putting more pressure on him, he'll be less motivated.
Understanding the essence of sparing his mishaps instead of making a fuss about them will yield more results than any other tactic. It would help if you treated your partner like an adult, irrespective of his behaviors around you because this step will put you one step ahead of the situation. More so, it will help you intuitively respond in most cases.
19. Try not to nag
Bothering or urging your partner continually about sanitary practices like taking a shower will be more humiliating than you imagined. Therefore, it's critical to avoid nagging about this subject. If your partner doesn't have the same cleanliness values as you do, try not to make him feel inferior about it.
Due to several lifestyle and environmental factors, people tend to learn dirty routines, which can be hard to desist from in the long run. Nonetheless, they can learn to adapt to the good practices if they're around the right people that will encourage instead of ridicule. The best way to help your partner get past his negative behavior is to encourage more than you worry.
20. Help him see the benefits
Maintaining a clean lifestyle has multiple benefits. You can make your partner strive for sanitariness by making him realize these advantages. Use your life to show him how great living clean can be. Practice good hygiene regularly and ensure it counters the negative habits your partner displays.
You can also subtly state the dangers of living unclean to give your boyfriend reasons to change. Ensure your comments aren't critical but enlightening. Act as if you're not aware he has such bad behaviors, and bring up some facts you read about in an article. If you subtly engage this tactic, you will be surprised at the changes your partner will make.
21. Compliment him
You need to engage in positive reinforcement to make your partner break out of disgusting behaviors. For example, saying he smells nice after taking a shower will make him feel good about himself. However, it would help if you were careful with the way you engage this tactic.
Men always want to feel masculine; therefore, praising your partner for little activities will crush his ego rather than boost it. If you're going to compliment your partner for his efforts towards sanitary practices, ensure you do it indirectly.
For instance, say something like, “Wow, I like your cologne. Did you get a new one?” This statement indirectly states how good he smells without necessarily pointing out his efforts to smell nice. You can also indirectly point out other areas you know he has worked on.
22. Try new products
Your partner might be motivated to embrace good hygiene if he has the right products for the job. You can research some of the most irresistible brands on the market and change your toiletries at home. Get products that might excite him and mention how great they are in your discussions.
Tell him how refreshed you felt after showering with the new soap you got, and he might be tempted to try it out for himself. Mention how smooth your feet felt when you applied a fresh foot cream, and he'll be intrigued. The more you wear around the positives of living healthy, the more you may want to embrace it.
23. Consider your priorities
If you've engaged the above-listed steps to make your boyfriend more hygienic but he remains hesitant to improve, you need to consider your priorities in the relationship. Is the sanitary practice a deal-breaker for you? Can you tolerate being with someone who doesn't regard cleanliness? Will staying with him only cause more problems in the future?
The answers to these questions will determine whether you'll stay in the relationship or move on. If you've communicated your inconvenience to your partner, but he doesn't take active steps to act better, it also reveals where his priorities lie. Therefore, you have to make a conducive choice for yourself.
If your boyfriend has not-so-good hygiene, the first thing to do is agree to talk to him about it. Proper communication is necessary for relationships to last. If you're not willing to open up about your discomfort, things may not improve.
Having a conversation with someone that has not-so-good hygiene is necessary. However, you can use playful methods to get them to improve on their routines. For example, brushing together or taking a shower at the same time might encourage them to get better.
All relationships are different and depend on the two parties involved. If you're not comfortable with unclean routines and your partner is not willing to improve, you should consider moving on. Understand that your comfortability should be your significant other's priority.
Signs of not-so-good hygiene include leaving the toilet dirty, failing to clean the body or hair, not disposing of waste, or keeping messy clothes. There are several dangers of bad sanitary practices, including getting infections and diseases. Therefore, being hygienic is a necessity.
Having a conversation with your partner about his odor or hygiene (be it having a wash or brushing his teeth) might be a good option. However, if you want to avoid hurting his feelings, you can offer to help by taking a shower with him. This method is a playful approach to dealing with not-so-good sanitary routines.
Did you enjoy this article on maintaining your boyfriend’s hygiene situation? Remember that if your partner is hesitant to adapt to healthy practices and doesn’t want to take a shower regularly, or wear clean clothes, you should consider moving on. Your partner should be willing to make you comfortable. Kindly leave a comment if you liked this article and share it with others.
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.