Are you jealous of your boyfriend’s friends and don't know how to go about the situation? Do you find yourself getting frustrated when your guy announces to you that he is going to meet a particular friend?
Believe me; I have been through this. There was a time when I used to get upset at a mere mention of a particular friend and it affected my relationship.
I tried to understand what was the reason behind my behavior. Eventually, I learned that my insecurity and the betrayal I faced in my past relationships was the reason why I was finding it difficult to trust my man when he was out with a female friend. As soon as I found the root cause I swore to myself that I will do what it needs to stop my irrational behavior.
In today’s article, we are going to look at what needs to be done if you are getting jealous of your boyfriend’s friends. These steps will help you in almost all relationships and you will have a blissful relationship. We will also see if it is normal to be jealous of a boyfriend’s friends and how to stop this behavior altogether successfully.
- 1 Is It Normal To Be Jealous Of My Boyfriend’s Friends?
- 2 How To Stop Being Jealous Of Your Boyfriend’s Friends?
- 2.1 1. Try to work on your insecurity
- 2.2 2. Establish boundaries early on
- 2.3 3. Get rid of negative thoughts
- 2.4 4. Keep yourself occupied
- 2.5 5. Be careful about taking advice from others
- 2.6 6. Be honest about your feelings
- 2.7 7. Let go of your past
- 2.8 8. Be patient
- 2.9 9. Act mature
- 2.10 9. Become friends with your boyfriend’s friends
- 2.11 10. Call it quits
- 3 FAQs
- 4 In Conclusion
Is It Normal To Be Jealous Of My Boyfriend’s Friends?
Sometimes, a little jealousy is completely normal and even good for a relationship as it makes the other person feel loved and important. However, if this jealousy repeats itself frequently and is irrational then it can get quite suffocating. It can even destroy a relationship if you make your partner choose one, between you and his friendships.
Relationships are too delicate. If you keep getting jealous every time your partner hangs out with someone else, especially if they are women; it shows that you don't trust them. So next time you feel a pang of jealousy, try to question yourself and find the root cause of the problem.
How To Stop Being Jealous Of Your Boyfriend’s Friends?
1. Try to work on your insecurity
Your jealousy might be the result of your low self-esteem, which might have stemmed from your insecurities. While there is no quick way to boost your low self-esteem and get rid of your insecurities, you need to find the root cause of the insecurities. After that, you need to work on yourself and try to be confident both about your man as well your relationship.
Understand that there is something about you because of which you are his girlfriend and the other girls are not. You need to stop seeing your imagination as a reality and take a grip on your fear before you ruin your relationship. Everybody loves a confident person and you need to become just that!
2. Establish boundaries early on
If you are not comfortable with your boyfriend having a lot of female friends but he is used to having a lot of friends from the opposite gender then you should let him know about your feelings. This way, you both should discuss and agree on what is acceptable and what is not in your relationship.
However, after agreeing that he will keep his distance from other girls, if he still talks to other girls then he has crossed the boundaries. Now, it is not an issue about jealousy but about him breaking an agreement that was between you two.
3. Get rid of negative thoughts
Are you worried that your boyfriend will cheat on you? Do you imagine him making out with other girls who are his friends? If yes, then you need to take control of your thoughts immediately. Your suspicious behavior will only irritate your boyfriend and he might be forced to call it quits.
So instead of being a pessimist, think about how your life has been with your guy. Think about the situations where he made you feel protected and loved. Try to think about all the happy memories that you both shared and slowly turn your jealousy into love.
4. Keep yourself occupied
There is a possibility that you are just overthinking too much about the situations, which are not even there in the first place. If you think this is the problem then you need to take charge of your life and start distracting yourself. You can keep yourself busy with your favorite hobby so that your mind does not get distracted and there is no time to get jealous of real friendships.
5. Be careful about taking advice from others
If you are facing any issue in your relationship, it is obvious that you will share your problem with your loved ones and take advice from them. However, you should be careful while applying the advice of others as your friends don't know what kind of a bond you share with your guy. They don’t know about your boyfriend’s friends, your needs, and your boundaries.
All relationships are different and what works for one will not necessarily work for the other. So it is better that you think from your position and trust your feelings in the situation.
6. Be honest about your feelings
Honesty is key to healthy relationships. If you are finding it difficult to get rid of your jealousy then it is time to talk with your boyfriend. Sit with them and let them know how it makes you feel when they get comfortable with a particular girl. Don't attack them. Tell them that you trust them, but you are finding it difficult to control your jealousy.
Let them know you need their help to get rid of the jealousy. Tell them that you understand how important friends are in life and you don't want this conflict to create problems between you two. After your guy understands your position, he will probably have a loving chat with you that will help you overcome jealousy.
7. Let go of your past
Your jealousy might be the reason for your broken trust in your past relationship. If that is the reason then you need to understand that your current boyfriend has no link to your past life. Therefore, you should not put him in the same league in which you have put the people who have hurt you.
Understand that friendships are very important in a person’s life and you cannot control who your man becomes friends with just because someone broke your trust in the past. Understand that your boyfriend is not the same kind of person as your ex.
8. Be patient
Even if you find something that you believe points to it being something more than friendship, you should try to be cool. There is a chance that there is something more to the story and to get the full picture you need to cool off first. It would be foolish to immediately act on your feeling of anger and frustration. Instead, you should be patient and let your boyfriend explain himself.
Of course, it is easier said than done, but if you are having jealousy towards a girl then it is better to have a heart-to-heart talk with your partner rather than having a shouting match.
9. Act mature
Think about what a beautiful phase in your life you are with your boyfriend and jealousy can easily ruin it. Every time you are jealous of a girl, remind yourself that this can cause fights and arguments with your boyfriend. Even if your partner leaves their friend for you, they will always blame you and there would be regret.
To avoid this situation, learn that friends are important for your partner and you need to respect their friendship.
9. Become friends with your boyfriend’s friends
One reason why you are jealous of your boyfriend’s friends is that you see them as your competition. Once you make these people your friends, your boyfriend and you won't only have some mutual friends but the feeling of jealousy will also disappear.
10. Call it quits
If even after working on your self-esteem and having a discussion with your boyfriend, you still cannot let go of your jealousy then maybe it is time to end the relationship. Maybe there is some other girl in his life, or, maybe you are just being over possessive. No matter what the reason is for your behavior, you are just ruining your relationship with your nature.
A relationship full of jealousy can never be happy, so it is better to end things before situations become much worse.
Although many people get jealous of their boyfriend's friends, it is neither good nor healthy. This type of behavior can not only ruin your relationship but can also cost you your inner peace. So instead of thinking too much about his friends, you should try to divert your mind and meet your own group.
To stop being jealous of your boyfriend's friends, you should first try to remember that your boyfriend has picked you over any of his friends. This means there is something that he likes about you, which he could not find anywhere else. So instead of being insecure, just be confident. you should take the above-mentioned steps to try to control your jealousy.
You get jealous when your boyfriend sees his friends because maybe you want all his attention and don't like it when he spends time with others. Or, maybe, you are insecure and feel that if your boyfriend meets his female friends then he might get attracted to them and leave you.
It is quite normal to be jealous when your best friend hangs out with someone else but you should still evaluate your feelings. Is this jealousy because of your low self-esteem or because you don't have any other friends? It is okay if you love your friend and want to spend a little more time with them.
If you don’t like your boyfriend's friends then you should be honest and tell him the truth. However, you should never make him choose between you and your friends. You should also try a little more to know them and see if your feelings change.
Do you believe jealousy can ruin relationships? Have you ever been jealous of your boyfriend's friend? How did you deal with this situation in your relationship? We would love to hear a word from you to help our readers. Please comment below!
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.