Is It Too Late To Get My Ex Back? (13 Things You Should Know)

So, you and your ex have decided to break up. Maybe it wasn’t your decision, but it happened. Now, you wonder, “Is it too late to get my ex back?”

In my opinion, it’s never too late to get your ex back. There are, of course, a few exceptions, but usually, a breakup happens because of mistakes in the relationship. Those mistakes can be rectified often!

If you had a successful relationship with your ex, look at things differently. Did you do stupid things to make him or her leave you? Is he or she still a good friend? Was your past relationship fun and positive? If so, you have a great ability to get your ex back.

Of course, there are cases when this is not possible. If you are positive that your ex never wants to hear from you again, you should forget about the relationship and just move on with your life. The breakup happened for a good reason, and even if you miss your ex, you need to leave him or her alone. 

In this post, we’ll look at when you have a chance to get your ex back and when you don’t.

When Should You Not Get Back With Your Ex?

1. Don’t try it if they have a new relationship

If your ex has someone new, they have moved on. You really have no place interfering with their relationship. If you try to get your ex back when he or she has someone new, you might just look desperate. He or she has decided it’s time in their life for a new individual, so give them their space and let them have a new life.

It’s really not your place to interfere at this point. You both broke up for a reason, and more than likely, that reason has not changed. He or she has found someone that whom he or she finds happiness, so let them be. Don’t interfere; it’s just really none of your business anymore. It’s time to throw this fish back in the ocean.

I know recovery after a breakup can be quite difficult, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. You just need to creatively spend your time in new ways. Work on self-improvement, join a church or sports team, consider taking night classes and furthering your education, or join a gym. Meet new people, and stay busy!

2. Don’t get your ex back if your relationship was toxic

don't get your ex back if your relationship was toxic

You may not realize this now, but if your relationship was toxic, you really have no business trying to get your ex back. You both weren’t good for one another, and you need to just move on. There’s no need to continue an unhealthy relationship or try to rekindle the flame that was there in the beginning. You just weren’t a good match.

3. Don’t do it if they have a court order against you

This one is pretty obvious. It is actually now ILLEGAL for you to contact them. That must mean something went really wrong in your relationship. Instead of trying to make it work, think of all the other fish in the sea. Get this guy or gal out of your mind. There is no need to continue trying to contact them; you might find yourself in jail if you do!

4. Don’t try it if they’ve asked you to leave them alone

This is usually the step that comes before a court order. They politely explain that they no longer want any contact from you. Don’t push the limits here; don’t pursue them; don’t continue trying to contact them. They are not playing hard to get. They want to be left alone. Honor their wishes and let them be.

5. Don’t get back together if there was any abuse in the relationship

don't get back together if there was any abuse in the relationship

There are many types of abuse, but if either one of you was the abuser, your relationship was not healthy. It just wasn’t meant to be, and you need to accept that. If you are having trouble letting it go, think of all the times one of you abused the other. Your partnership was rocky, at best.

The National Domestic Abuse Hotline is available 24/7. You can call and report any abuse that was or is happening in your life. As they report, everyone has the right to live free without the fear of domestic violence in their relationships. Their hotline is completely confidential, as well, so they are available just to listen to you. 

What do you have to lose by giving them a call? They might just be the exact outlet you need to discuss what happened with your ex – no matter what went down. Physical abuse is not the only abuse out there, either. Some relationships have emotional and mental abuse, which usually involve name-calling, screaming, and threats.

6. Don’t get your ex back if you were addicted to them

If you have an unhealthy obsession with your ex, that’s not a good thing. You should consider cutting them off, even if they are an awesome friend today. You need to learn to heal from this unhealthy obsession or addiction because you are liable to repeat the same patterns with your next boyfriend or girlfriend.

7. Don’t try to get your ex back if you cheated

don't try to get your ex back if you cheated

Unfaithfulness is very hard to forgive. If someone has ever cheated on you, you know what it feels like and can probably empathize with what your ex feels right now. This is something where forgiveness just does not come easily. Instead of trying to get with your ex again, consider working on some self-improvement to learn the root cause.

Figure out why you went elsewhere for love. Did you fall for someone else? Were you bored in the partnership with your ex? Were your needs not met? You don’t want to repeat this mistake with your next partner, so talk to a therapist to get to the root of the problem, so you are bound to repeat it. This will help you the most in the long run!

8. Don’t get your ex back if you were better off as friends

If you and your ex have agreed that you make better pals than anything else, you should not try to win his or her heart all over again. Over time, you will both move on with someone else. You can stay friends; just don’t ruin the friendships by pretending there is more there than there truly is. It won’t turn out in your favor.

When There Might Still Be Hope

9. There might be a chance in the future if you are just too unhealthy at the moment to be in a relationship

If at the moment, you need to work on yourself, there is a chance for a future. You just need a few months or years of self-improvement. You’ve got to get to the point where you are healthy enough to be in relationships once again.

10. In the future, you might get back together if you are addicted to relationships right now

in the future you might get back together if you are addicted to relationships right now

Do you love being a couple? Do you enjoy being in love? If you’ve said YES, there’s a great chance that you are like anyone else! We also love those things, but for some, there is an unhealthy addiction to these things. Consider joining a support group or going to counseling to resolve this addiction. Then, you might approach the ex.

When You Have A Real Chance In The Future

11. You are in recovery from addiction and getting better

Maybe you have a drug or alcohol problem. If you are in recovery or seeking appropriate treatment for these things and if they were what caused the demise of your partnership, you may be able to resolve things once you get better!

12. You have a chance if you said something you didn’t mean

We all do this from time to time. We are angry, and we just blurt out hurtful things. Your ex may have been so hurt by what you said that he or she decided to end things, but you might be able to apologize, given some time, or offer an apologetic action, like sending her roses or buying him tickets to his favorite sporting event!

13. You have a chance if there was a misunderstanding that caused the breakup

you have a chance if there was a misunderstanding that caused the breakup

You may still need to give it a little bit of time, but you could clear things up and get back together. Just assess what went wrong and think about how you could resolve the issue. You don’t want to make the same mistakes with your ex if you get back together, but you could start over and begin a new partnership with him or her!


When should I give up trying to get my ex back?

If abuse was a part of your relationship, more than likely, the same mistakes will occur in your relationship if you were to get back together. That’s not healthy! One or both of you need to spend time with a counselor, getting the help you need to recover from the hurt.

Can an ex come back years later?

Yes, but it depends on why you broke up. He or she may become a new person in the future. If you begin to see changes, there is a chance. People change all the time, so there is a good chance that you will hear from them in the future.

Should I keep begging my ex?

Begging is a lost cause. No one wants to cross the finish line of life with someone who is desperate. They will lose all interest if you come across that way. You can talk to them about getting back together once, but then it’s just wrong to continue bringing it up.

What are the signs that my ex will come back?

If he doesn’t have a new girlfriend, there’s a good chance. It’s not impossible to get back together if your past relationship wasn’t out of control with issues. Are you still friends with your ex? He probably does miss you as a girlfriend if you still speak to one another.

Can you still love someone after years apart?

It’s not impossible to still want to walk the path of life with an ex after years apart. Continue talking to them to see if they are completely interested in you or not. Relationships have survived much worse. Start with the texting phase to see what will happen!

To Summarize

What is your idea for getting an ex back? Have you been in the same relationship for a long time but think he’s going to break up with you? As long as you have a successful breakup, there’s a chance you could get back together! Just take some time apart.

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