Do you worry that you intimidate guys?
Are you concerned that you will never find a suitable partner because men seem to feel intimidated when they’re around you and, as a result, run away?
This guide will help you navigate some of the reasons why/when men feel intimidated by women, as well as some of the tell-tale signs to look out for that show he likes you but is intimidated.
To get a better idea whether you intimidate guys or not, scroll down and keep reading. I’ve listed the clearcut signs that men are intimidated by you.
Table of Contents
Men can sense when a woman isn’t impressed by superficiality - like using material possessions to gain favor with her - and some men are intimidated by this. Knowing what you want in a relationship may intimidate men who only want something casual or superficial (and perhaps that’s okay if you’re not wanting something casual anyways).
In the dating world, successful women might seem threatening to some guys. If the man feels the woman is more accomplished, he might retreat in his advances. That being said, you should never downplay your achievements to make a man feel more comfortable - wait for a man that celebrates your achievements.
If you forget to smile or are unfriendly, you may come across as unapproachable, which, naturally, will leave people feeling intimidated.
If you’re an attractive woman who’s remained single for quite some time, chances are the men around you feel intimidated by your beauty. If they feel you’re out of their league, it’s unlikely they’ll approach you because they may simply feel as if they don’t measure up.
In this case, taking control of the situation and approaching someone you’re interested in, as opposed to waiting for them to approach you, may work in your favor.
If you’re a straightforward person who speaks without a filter, many men will undoubtedly be intimidated by you. In general, people will avoid any form of interaction that demoralizes them.
Speaking your mind and being honest is an honorable quality, as long as you remain empathetic towards the other person’s feelings.
In many ways, social status is something that we just find ourselves in. Belonging to a certain group in society isn’t always up to us, it’s something we happen to belong to from as early as birth, which is then carried through during adolescence and into adulthood.
“Socioeconomic status is the position of an individual or group on the socioeconomic scale, which is determined by a combination of social and economic factors such as income, amount and kind of education, type and prestige of occupation, place of residence…”
Your social status generally influences which schools you attend, who your friends are, and oftentimes, who you end up marrying.
If you belong to a different social group than your potential partner, particularly if it’s an exceptionally wealthy or exclusionary group, he may find you and your friends too intimidating to make a move.
This is something I’ve seen time and time again when it comes to dating and relationships. In fact, I think it’s one of the contributing factors that are seeing fewer and fewer people in committed relationships or marriages.
There are many men who are intimidated by women who “don’t need them,” so much so that they avoid asking these women out.
However, I think it’s important to note that being independent is an amazing, super important quality. Do not sacrifice your independence in order to make a man feel more comfortable. Being threatened by independence is something they need to work on and overcome.
If you’re the type of person who’s always up to something fun and exciting in your personal life, social life, and career, a guy might feel intimidated if his life doesn’t measure up.
If you’re one of those people who’s incredibly blessed and talented at almost everything, you’re sure to make a handful of people around you, guys included, feel intimidated.
While being this talented is a massive blessing and something that should be cherished, taking note of the way you come across (i.e. not boasting, showing off, or always trying to one-up others) might help others feel less intimidated.
There are a handful of men who find physically strong and fit women intimidating. This could be because traditionally, men would fill the role of the strong protector. Regardless, if taking care and pride in your physique makes you happy, you shouldn’t change this to suit anyone else.
Many men, and people in general, pride themselves on their material success - the car they have, the address they reside in, the jobs they hold, and the brands they wear. If you’re not easily impressed by this, and he values himself based on these things, he may find you intimidating.
If you genuinely are interested in him, show him instead that you value him as a person and value his characteristics, as opposed to valuing his material success. You can do this by complimenting him on personality traits of his that you find inspiring.
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Whether you're married or have just started seeing someone, infidelity rates are on the rise and have increased over 40% in the last 20 years, so you have all the right to be worried.
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I can speak from experience here, this is something I’ve witnessed many times in relationships - both mine and others.
Men, particularly younger ones, are often intimidated by having intimate relationships with women who want to get married and have kids sometime soon. This is one of the clear signs a guy might be emotionally immature and not ready for something serious.
If you want something serious and long-lasting and he doesn’t, move on instead of trying to change his mind.
If you have an expensive lifestyle and enjoy the finer things in life you might leave men feeling intimidated. Their intimidation will come from being unsure of how they’ll provide you with the same lifestyle, financially speaking.
If you really like a man but love the finer things in life, you might want to consider being more discreet in the early days of dating so you don’t scare him off.
For one reason or another many people in today’s society still incorrectly hold the belief that it’s acceptable for a man to have had many sexual partners but not for a woman. While this is an old-school belief that needs to be challenged, it’s unfortunately still true in many instances.
If you’ve had more sexual partners than he’s had, he may feel intimidated. He might constantly wonder if he measures up to your other experiences - which might also give him performance issues.
While he might want to know just how many men you’ve been intimate with, if you don’t want to intimidate him in this regard, you have every right to keep this information to yourself.
If you’re the type of person who gives everything you get involved in 100% of yourself, or if you’re the type of person who thinks about life on a very deep level, or if you’re the type of person who feels everything, the good and the bad, very intensely, then men who aren’t emotionally mature or on the same level may find this intimidating.
Wait for the man who can accept all of you, exactly as you are!
If you often catch a man staring at you or glancing at you but he never plucks up the courage to approach you, it’s likely because he’s intimidated by you. He’s probably uncertain about the way you’ll react to him approaching you and is letting his insecurities get the better of him.
This sort of behavior is toxic and shouldn’t be tolerated, however, it still happens. If a man tries to bring you down or belittle you/your achievements it’s likely because he feels threatened. Don’t let his insecurities prevent you from further success and from going after your dreams. And, in my opinion, it’s better to cut ties with someone like this.
A lot of women can make even the toughest men stumble on their words. You might notice men trying to impress you in one way or another, yet their anxiety still shines through. If this scenario tends to happen quite often, it proves they’re shaken up by your presence.
If a man makes inquiries about you but is too shy to come to you personally, it shows he’s intimidated by you but still interested in you. You might want to consider showing this individual your warmer, softer, more approachable side.
Merely being a strong woman can make any man intimidated. He’ll worry about saying the right things or impressing you with his actions.
If you notice that a guy always needs his friend’s company before speaking to you, he might be frightened by you. However, this doesn’t indicate he’s not attracted to you.
If you possess strong and confident qualities, the man might worry about being rejected. He might need his friend’s presence to boost his confidence.
Some men might have the courage to approach and talk to the lady they like, but might be too scared to ask her out. A scenario like this shows he’s intimidated by you.
This can be confusing and send mixed signals. The best way to handle such a situation is to find out the guy’s opinions on dating. Indirectly ask him if he’s attracted to anyone and why he hasn’t made a move yet.
Most men brag about their accomplishments to cover up their insecurities. If he feels vulnerable or insecure, he’ll use his success to look good in front of a woman.
When a man feels intimidated by a woman’s presence, he’ll rely on material possessions to gain favor with her. He may feel as if his personality or looks aren’t set to impress, so he’ll rely on extravagant gestures to get him noticed.
If you can’t explain a guy’s behavior around you, it might hint at his insecurities.
For example, failing to say ‘hello’ on some days, but being friendly on other occasions. Or, opening up to you at times, but keeping secrets or shying away from conversations at other timesare all examples of odd behavior that may be caused because he’s feeling insecure.
It’s obvious that texting is a far easier way of interacting with someone you like when you feel anxious or intimidated than striking up a face-to-face conversation would be.
Phone screens are often seen as a barrier of protection of sorts. People are more likely to say how they truly feel or approach those they wouldn’t ordinarily, because of this barrier.
If a man likes you but is too nervous or intimidated to approach you in real life, he’s likely to text you instead.
If a guy likes you, he’ll ask questions in an attempt to get to know you more intimately and on a deeper level.
Not only that but you’ll find he makes an effort to remember important details about your life - like your birthday, important upcoming events, your likes, dislikes, fears, and maybe even your favorite drink or the way you take your coffee. If he remembers information like this, it’s a strong sign he likes you.
A man will only introduce someone he really likes and cares about to his closest friends and family. And, if he’s inviting you around time and time again to hang out with him and those closest to him, you can rest assured he likes you.
Avoiding eye contact is a telltale sign that someone is nervous or intimidated by you. It takes a good deal of confidence and certainty to keep eye contact with someone.
If you like someone it’s even more difficult to maintain eye contact than usual, especially in the early days while you’re still getting to know each other. So, if he avoids eye contact it’s one of the signs a guy likes you but is intimidated.
No one is going to make mention of future plans together with someone they don’t like or don’t hope to spend more time with. Mentioning future plans also helps him gauge your feelings towards him, based on your response/reaction.
If you’re not dating but there’s a guy in your life who displays any signs of jealousy or overprotectiveness, it’s a sure sign he likes you but might be too intimidated by you to make any moves.
If you want to test this out, gauge the way he responds next time you mention you’re going on a date or talking to a guy.
Whether it’s your friends who tell you or his friends who drop subtle hints about him liking you, you can always rely on friends to tell the truth and pick up on cues you may have missed out on.
If a guy’s relying on friends to drop hints about the way he feels for you, it’s a definite sign the guy likes you but feels intimidated in one way or another.
Listen closely to what your gut is telling you, if you’re in tune with yourself, it’s the one thing you can rely on fully.
Chemistry is oftentimes something you can just feel without ever having to utter a word. If you can feel there’s chemistry between the two of you but he hasn’t made any moves yet, perhaps he’s nervous, intimidated, or fearful of rejection. Try making the first move yourself.
If you’ve noticed a guy hanging around you and your friends a lot more than he ever did before, it might be because he likes you. He’s possibly genuinely interested in getting to know you more but, if he feels intimidated by you, is unsure of how to do it.
Hanging around in the background is a “safe option” for him until he figures out how to approach you.
He might be hopeful that by hanging around, you’ll notice him. If you do like him, this is a good time to show your approachable side or approach him yourself.
One of the sure signs a guy likes you but is intimidated is if he keeps tabs on your dating life, without making any official moves himself.
If he’s always interested in who you’re talking to, going on dates with, or have dated, it’s likely that he’s trying to establish what your type is, how he compares, and whether or not he can make a move.
If a guy likes you, he’s likely going to agree with you more often than not. By doing so, he’s able to avoid any potential confrontations or arguments with you. In the early stages of an intimate relationship, he’s probably going to be even more agreeable than usual, to try and keep you as happy as possible.
While this can be annoying for some, know that this time will pass and as he gets to know you better, his true feelings and opinions will become more and more evident.
This certainly is not a very mature emotional response, however, it still seems to happen fairly frequently when a man finds a woman intimidating.
Sometimes, men are so insecure, for one reason or another, that they’d rather ignore a confident/beautiful/powerful woman than deal with their feelings of inadequacy when around her. This is an obvious relationship red flag, one that you shouldn’t consider entertaining.
One of the obvious signs a guy likes you but is intimidated is if he is shy or quiet when he’s around you in person but uses social media to get your attention. If you find he’s liking or commenting on your photos, or sending you DMs, it can be a sign he likes you.
Social media is also a great way for him to get to know a bit more about your life, likes, and dislikes in a subtle way, before approaching you. It’s a great way to measure compatibility.
You might find there’s a guy who’s always flirting with you or chatting to you but he never takes the next step, i.e. asking you out on a date… this is one of the obvious signs a guy likes you but is intimidated.
If a guy likes you, he’s likely not going to make mention of other women or relationships. Even if he is talking to other people, or going on dates with other people, he won’t let you know about it.
Alternatively, he may not mention other women or relationships because there aren’t any... he may be keeping himself available for you.
One of the clear signs a guy likes you is if he’s there for you at the drop of a hat. He might be too intimidated to express his feelings for you outright, but he’ll show you he cares about you and likes you by expressing concern for you, making sure you’re always safe and comfortable, listening to your stories, and going out of his way for your well-being.
Watching and analyzing a guy’s body language when he’s around you will give you a good indication as to whether or not he likes you and is nervous around you.
Columbia University Medical Center has listed the following as signs of nervousness body language:
If you find that many men are intimidated by your looks, your personality, or your achievements but you still want to remain approachable, you might want to try the following out in order to break the ice:
The best way to gauge if you intimidate men is by watching their behavior around you. If they tend to be nervous, tongue-tied, or blush far too often, it hints that you might be making them nervous.
If you are purpose-driven, ambitious, or self-assertive, it can be intimidating to some guys. However, none of these traits are negative. If a man feels threatened by these qualities, it could hint at his own insecurities.
You can be less intimidating by incorporating kindness, politeness, and praise into your general interactions with men. Making men feel more comfortable when interacting with you will undoubtedly make you less intimidating. These steps will help you build more meaningful relationships with the opposite sex.
If you like the guy and you sense he feels intimidated around you, making the first move yourself is likely to help things move along between the two of you. Gone are the days when men were the only ones to make any sort of relationship advances while women sat back and waited. If you want to make the first move, you have every right to do so. In fact, many men even find it attractive.
Remember, it’s not your fault if you attract insecure men. If you want a passionate relationship with someone, you don’t need to change or betray yourself. Hiding who you truly are will only make your relationships superficial. Wait for the man who will accept you as you are!
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Utilize this tool to verify if he's truly who he claims to be
Whether you're married or just started dating someone, infidelity rates have risen by over 40% in the past 20 years, so your concerns are justified.
Do you want to find out if he's texting other women behind your back? Or if he has an active Tinder or dating profile? Or even worse, if he has a criminal record or is cheating on you?
This tool can help by uncovering hidden social media and dating profiles, photos, criminal records, and much more, potentially putting your doubts to rest.
