Responding to your first date invitation as a girl can be a bit daunting, especially with the current state of things in the dating world; you never know what statements have a negative underlying meaning.
No matter how scary it seems, we still all fantasize about getting asked on a date by our crushes but not all of us know how to say yes to a date. Saying yes to your crush in your head is way easier than saying yes in real life. First, you have to deal with your nerves and the excitement, then you need to control yourself so you don't seem too desperate.
Suppose you've found yourself in this dilemma, you're not alone. It's normal to have these fears. If you're looking for some helpful tips on different ways to say yes to a date, keep reading.
- 1 34 Tips To Say Yes To A Date
- 1.1 1. Keep it simple and polite
- 1.2 2. Practicing how to say yes to a date is okay
- 1.3 3. Check your body language
- 1.4 4. Work on your confidence
- 1.5 5. Breathe
- 1.6 6. It's okay to follow up if you weren't sure you said the right things
- 1.7 7. Be sure he's asking you out on a date and not just a casual outing
- 1.8 8. Don't say yes to a date if you aren’t interested in him
- 1.9 9. Be honest and straightforward
- 1.10 10. Don't be afraid to show your emotions
- 1.11 11. Use touch
- 1.12 12. Give him a chance
- 1.13 13. The question depends on the response
- 1.14 14. Be playful if you can
- 1.15 15. It's not wrong to let him know you've been anticipating
- 1.16 16. A cheeky response also works
- 1.17 17. If you're attracted to him, show it
- 1.18 18. It's not wrong to flirt a little
- 1.19 19. Ask where you will be going
- 1.20 20. Ask if you'd both be alone or if it's a group date
- 1.21 21. Ask if he's picking you up or if you'll meet him there
- 1.22 22. Agree on a time that is convenient for you
- 1.23 23. You don't have to say yes immediately if you aren't sure
- 1.24 24. Talk to a friend or close relative if you're confused
- 1.25 25. You can ask for a talking stage first
- 1.26 26. Stay calm
- 1.27 27. Be careful of online date offers
- 1.28 28. Give a timely response if it's an online date request
- 1.29 29. Suggest an immediate date
- 1.30 30. Your first date should be in a public place
- 1.31 31. Do your research
- 1.32 32. Your outfit says a lot
- 1.33 33. Be on time
- 1.34 34. If you decide not to say yes, be mature and polite about it
- 2 FAQs
- 3 In Conclusion
34 Tips To Say Yes To A Date
1. Keep it simple and polite
Remember that he’s just asking you to be his girl, not to marry him. So, you don't have to give a speech or beat about the bush. Think out your words well before you respond so he doesn't get confused or hurt.
Also, don't say something vague like, “I'll go for it” or “that sounds okay”. Those responses seem reluctant; he may get worried and feel like he's bugging you. You want to avoid making him feel insecure about himself so a simple, definite answer like, “Sure, I’d love to” is perfect. You don’t need to say too much.
2. Practicing how to say yes to a date is okay
Everyone is awkward sometimes. Don’t feel bad if a response doesn’t come to you naturally. You can practice in your mirror or with a close girl friend if you’re nervous. Your friend could play your date while you practice how to say yes to a date. This applies only if you know he’s going to ask you out ahead of time.
If you don’t want to get graphic by talking to yourself in the mirror or practicing with a girl friend, you can picture him asking you out vividly in your mind, then test out some responses. This will help you work through your fears beforehand, so you don’t stammer or freeze when he asks. You can audibly repeat the answer that sounds good, a million times till you feel more confident.
3. Check your body language
Body language can say a lot more than actual words sometimes. If you're happy to spend time with him, it should show. So, your words aren't the only thing you should practice.
It's pretty simple, first of all, smile and ensure that your posture is open. Try your best not to cross your hands or legs. Also, if you're standing, try standing with your feet slightly spread (shoulder length). Also, remember to maintain eye contact; it's polite and shows that you're engaged in the conversation.
4. Work on your confidence
If you're a bit shaky and unsure of yourself, it's going to affect the way you say yes to a date. So, work on your confidence too. It's even harder talking to someone you have feelings for, it takes a lot from you. Much like speaking in front of a crowd, speaking to a love interest requires a strong sense of self-worth and healthy self-esteem.
This obviously cannot be achieved in one day, you need to build on your confidence levels everyday. Be gentle with yourself, rest, give yourself compliments, and treat yourself well. Don't feel guilty for doing the things you love, it's healthy to take out time for yourself, rest, and remind yourself that you are valuable.
Don't beat yourself up if you stutter or choke on your words while you’re saying yes to a date, it's perfectly okay. Don't beat yourself up about that, some boys may find it cute that you're a bit nervous. So just pause and take a deep breath then go on with what you're trying to say.
Don't try to polish it up and look perfectly confident, just keep talking and keep your answer short and simple.
6. It's okay to follow up if you weren't sure you said the right things
If you responded negatively to his invitation because you were nervous or confused, it's not bad to follow up. Just because you made a mistake, doesn't mean it can’t be corrected.
As soon as you've calmed yourself down a bit you can call him back and take back your words. Explain to him why you couldn’t say yes to a date with him and why you felt the need to clear things up. Try talking to him that same day if you can, because some people can get over rejection very fast. He could end up getting over you or perhaps going on a date with someone else. So, don't take too much time to clear things up.
7. Be sure he's asking you out on a date and not just a casual outing
To avoid getting embarrassed, you need to be sure what his invitation is for. “Should we grab dinner?” is a vague question; it could mean anything. He could be after a friendship or he may just enjoy your company and want to hang out casually. It would be embarrassing getting all dressed up and ready just to go for a casual, unromantic dinner; it's hard to recover from something like that.
So, the safest thing to do is to clarify. You can simply ask, ” Are you asking me out on a date?” If you think that's too direct, try asking in a more subtle way or dressing casually just in case. Most times you will know if it's a real date if he calls or texts afterwards.
8. Don't say yes to a date if you aren’t interested in him
You aren't obligated to say yes to his invitation if you don't really see him in that light or if you aren't attracted to him. It's better to be forward with him than to lead him on.
If you think he's a cool person and you'd like to get to know him, it's okay to go on a date. However, if you aren't attracted to him at all and don't wish to be more than friends, don't say yes out of pity.
If he has a bad attitude or does not respect you, you don't have to go anywhere with him. You're allowed to decline. If he seems intimidating and you can't tell him to his face, you can give him a response over the phone when you get home.
9. Be honest and straightforward
A direct answer is the best answer. Some girls think that dragging out their answers a million times or playing games seems mysterious and more attractive. This couldn't be further from the truth. Guys want to feel wanted or desired too, dragging out your answer or giving a vague answer could seem like you don't really want to go on a date with him but you're just trying to make him feel good about himself.
Being indirect supports the stereotype that no means yes. You could end up giving him a wrong Impression about who girls really are. You don't have to sound overly enthusiastic or desperate, just be direct and forward with your answer.
10. Don't be afraid to show your emotions
Don't mask your reactions because you think he'll feel like you're desperate. If he feels like you're desperate just because you're openly excited he's definitely not someone you want to go out with.
However, real confident men aren't afraid of a little enthusiasm. They'd like to see the happiness and excitement in your eyes when you say yes to a date with them. If it was a surprise, watching your reaction will make him more encouraged.
11. Use touch
If you've been hanging out with this guy for a while, you may be close enough to him to place your hand on his shoulder or cheek without it seeming weird.
Touch can add an endearing feel to your response. Even if you end up saying just one word, placing a hand on his shoulder can go the extra mile to let him know that you are interested in going out with him. It may also show him that you both have lots of chemistry and things could work out fine between you.
12. Give him a chance
You may not feel attracted to a guy right away when he asks you out, but it's wise to give him a chance. It could surprise you that you will end up in a meaningful relationship with him.
People who have experienced love often say that you find them in the oddest ways and in the oddest places. This doesn't mean you should say yes to creepy, stalker guys. If he seems dangerous, stay away from him.
On the other hand, a guy who seems kind, thoughtful, and interesting is someone you'd want to be in a relationship with. Even if you aren't so sure, try going on a first date first then see where things go.
13. The question depends on the response
Give your response based on the question he asks. If he says something like, “let's grab a cup of coffee sometime” it's better to say “sure that would be nice” instead of a plain, one-worded “yes”.
If he says something like, “Would you like to have dinner tomorrow night?” You can reply with a simple, “Yes, I'd love to” or “Sure! That sounds great”. So, listen to his question carefully and give your answer according to the question.
14. Be playful if you can
If you're confident and relaxed enough, adding a fun, playful touch when you say yes could really help to lighten the mood.
This works better if you're a bit more familiar with this person like if you're in the same class, group or you live in the same environment. If you're around each other a lot, then you must have had several conversations over time. So you should be relatively comfortable with him.
If you realize that he's asking you out in this case, you can loosen up a bit. If he says, “we should grab a drink tomorrow night”, you could say, “you got it, chief!”
15. It's not wrong to let him know you've been anticipating
Lots of girls are afraid of sounding desperate so they try to pretend they aren’t excited. However, most guys love to see the surprise on your face.
A response like, “I thought you'd never ask” isn't bad at all. First of all, you'd be showing him that you're happy to go out with him. This will make you feel more relaxed with him and help with your confidence levels.
16. A cheeky response also works
Cheeky can be fun sometimes. This could really help if you notice he's a bit nervous. Telling him something like “Sure, I'll have my people call your people”. This will probably make him laugh.
It also helps if you're feeling a bit nervous too. Making a cheeky joke will help create a playful mood and make you a bit more relaxed so you can reply properly. Whatever you do, don't try too hard, it will look forced and end up ruining things.
17. If you're attracted to him, show it
There's nothing wrong with letting him know how attractive he is. If you're attracted to this guy, don't be afraid to show it. You could start by complimenting his look, tell him how great he looks in his outfit, or compliment a feature you like.
He's likely to reciprocate. This way, even before your date you're both sure of the chemistry between you. If you don't have a chance to voice out how attracted you are to him, let your body language do the talking.
18. It's not wrong to flirt a little
Being flirty could add a little spice to the moment. This works for a guy who seems comfortable in his own skin and doesn't seem to be afraid of getting turned down.
These kinds of guys are likely to initiate the conversation with a witty pick-up line. Even though it sounds cheeky, that's a perfect time to flirt a little. Start with a subtle flirty statement like, “what's in it for me?” You can squint a little to get your point across. If you're doing it right, he will get the picture and take things from there.
19. Ask where you will be going
You'll never know if you don't ask. If you're sure you would love to go out with him and you've made that clear, it's best to be clear about some other things.
Some guys could forget to give you the details of the date perhaps because they were nervous or excited. So it's left to you to ask all the necessary questions.
One of the most important questions is “where would we be going?” You need to know this so you can dress for the occasion. You may discover that he hadn't even thought of where he was taking you yet, so he may ask you to suggest a location. That way you can pick an activity that's in your comfort zone.
20. Ask if you'd both be alone or if it's a group date
You'd also need to know if you'd be alone with him or if it's going to be a double date. Some really nervous guys would prefer to bring a friend and their partner along for moral support. Even if you're okay with this arrangement it's important for you to know before you say yes.
Having a double date on the first date isn't a bad Idea. As a matter of fact, it gives you the opportunity to get a sneak peek into his circle. Getting to know his friends can give you a better idea about who he is. So if he suggests it, you can say yes but ask so you will know beforehand.
21. Ask if he's picking you up or if you'll meet him there
It's important to know if he's picking you up from your place or if you need to meet him at the location. It's essential for you to know ahead of time so you can plan your day.
If you're taking public transportation, you're going to need to know what time to leave your house so you can get there on time or you may need to check if you know your way to the place if you're using your car. Whatever the plan is, try to find out early.
22. Agree on a time that is convenient for you
You need to agree on a favorable time on the spot, it's risky to just accept his own time and end up canceling on him later on. Canceling or rescheduling a date could wane his enthusiasm and he may end up giving you an indefinite date which usually means it's not happening anymore.
So, if he hasn't suggested a time, perhaps you should do that and agree on a time that favors both of you. If he suggests a time that isn't convenient for you, reschedule before you say yes.
23. You don't have to say yes immediately if you aren't sure
You aren't expected to be 100% sure about getting into a relationship immediately, you can ask to think about it first before you finally say yes. If we're being honest, some guys could get put off by this but don't let that make you feel pressured.
It's not bad to take some time to consider if you're ready for a relationship at this time. Simply ask to get back to him either the next day or another day but give him a definite time and keep to it. Also, remember to give him a clear reason why it isn’t a good time for you.
24. Talk to a friend or close relative if you're confused
Sometimes we just can't shake off a weird feeling of doubt about someone and sometimes it's our intuition pointing out a red flag to us. If you feel a little uneasy about this guy but you can’t place your finger on what exactly it is, it's best to discuss it with a friend or family member.
Most times it's the people closest to us who can spot a red flag in our relationship faster than we can. So, if you're in doubt about saying yes, speak to a friend, that may give you more clarity.
25. You can ask for a talking stage first
If you're not very familiar with this guy and you feel too weird to say yes, you can request for some time to get to know him over chats and phone calls first.
The talking stage is a great way to find out who this person is without putting yourself in a dangerous relationship or having unpleasant experiences. There's no rush when it comes to these things, if he's acting too urgent, he probably isn't genuine. So, take your time and move at your own pace but do it honestly.
26. Stay calm
Even though you've been anticipating dating him, you need to stay calm. This doesn't mean you have to mask your feelings and emotions, but try not to overreact, it may overwhelm him.
You can smile while you say yes, this is enough to let him know that you're glad to be with him. You could also give him a casual hug if you're that happy, but not a kiss. However, screaming, jumping and other overly dramatic reactions are unnecessary.
27. Be careful of online date offers
Online dating is becoming more and more popular and even normal these days. Lots of people prefer to register on dating sites since it exposes them to more options. There are a good number of positive testimonials from successful couples who found each other on dating sites.
However, online dating has its dangers, since most dating sites involve chatting and not video calls, it's easy to get catfished or involved with a dangerous person. So, before you accept to go on a face-to-face date with someone you met online, take the necessary security measures. If you can, ask for a video call before you meet them in person.
28. Give a timely response if it's an online date request
Chatting is a convenient way to communicate with someone but it can also be tricky. Since you can't watch the person's body language or hear their tone it's easy to misunderstand them. That's why you need to try your best to respond to their messages on time and clearly.
This is especially important on dating sites since a person of interest can become unavailable at any time because there's always someone else waiting to talk to that same person. So, if you really like this guy make sure to give him a quick and clear response.
29. Suggest an immediate date
This also applies more to people who meet on dating sites. The same way your love interest could get snagged by someone else if you wait weeks to respond to their message is the same way they could get snagged if you wait weeks to set a date.
If he requests to meet face to face with you, try to say yes on the closest available day so he doesn't meet someone else before that time and decide to change his mind. This may seem ridiculous but the dating game has changed, with the help of technology people have become more dispensable. So, if you really like this guy, don't delay anything.
30. Your first date should be in a public place
It's wise to meet strangers in a public place. Seeing a movie at his place isn't the best thing at this point.
Since you're just meeting this person, you need to ensure that you're in a safe place and you aren't putting yourself in danger. Even if you've had a video call with them, you still don't really know who they are and what they're capable of. So, it's best to meet at a park, a restaurant, or any other public and open place. If your friends don't mind, you can ask them to follow you from a distance and hang around during the date to watch your back.
31. Do your research
Stalking is not a very good habit but in some cases like this, a little cyberstalking isn’t too much trouble. Once you say yes to seeing this person face to face, the next thing to do is check him out online.
Facebook is the easiest place to get information on someone but there are different ways to do so. Once you find out his name, check him out on Facebook. Check if he has family and friends that post things about him or tag him on things so you have an idea who you're dealing with.
If he seems to belong to groups that have questionable motives or foundations, you can prepare for that or reconsider the date. You don't want to end up dating a nazi. So, look him up and perhaps ask your friends to do the same.
32. Your outfit says a lot
You need to dress for the occasion. If you're happy and looking forward to being on dates with this person, it shouldn't only show when you say yes, you also need to let it show with what you wear.
Dress for the kind of date you decided on but try putting in some effort. For example, if you decided to do something active like hiking, you don't have to look like a homeless person just because you'd be hiking in the woods. Take a bath, wear clean, nice-looking activewear. Wear your hair in a neat ponytail or another nice-looking style, don't leave it looking tangled and unkempt.
Whatever you do, look good. It will show that you actually care about him and you're looking forward to dating him.
33. Be on time
Being on time for a date is something that should go without saying. Being late for any kind of meeting is rude and dates are not an exception. So, make sure you agree on a date and time that is free for you.
If you know it will take a while for you to get dressed, put on your makeup and accessories, start really early so you can finish on time. If you're taking public transportation, ensure to know what time your bus or train will get there and be at the station on time. If you're getting there with your car, leave your house on time so you can get there on time. Factor in the traffic if you live in a busy city.
34. If you decide not to say yes, be mature and polite about it
Yes isn't the only answer you're allowed to give. If you aren't ready for a relationship or anything serious, there are different ways you can decline.
The problem lots of girls have with this is getting the message across with respect. There's no need to get mad at him for asking you out on a date, he’s just interested in you and wants to get to know you, there's no need to make a joke about him or be rude to him. Being honest isn't a crime. So, if you aren't ready to say yes to this guy, a simple explanation will do.
There are different ways to respond with how you feel. If you’re interested in this person and you'd like to see how far things can go between you two, a date would be a nice place to begin. However, if you aren't ready for that, give him an immediate ‘no' and an explanation why. Don't drag on and waste his time, let him know immediately.
There are different ways to make your response cute. Adding a little humor, cheekiness, or flirtiness to your response is a good way to sound cute. Instead of just saying a direct yes, you could add a twist to it and say something like, “definitely not NO” while batting your lashes. Adding your own cheeky touch will make your response sound cute and lighten the mood.
Texting a yes is almost the same as saying yes face to face. However, you should try your best to say yes on time. You can say something like, “Yes, sure I'd love to”, or “of course, why not?”. You can use emojis too if you'd like to be a bit more expressive.
There are different ways to show you’re happy without seeming desperate. You can smile while you respond and let the excitement show in your voice but try not to overreact. Desperation would be giving your answer before he completes his sentence or planting a kiss on his cheek even before you say yes to the date.
There are so many ideas you can consider, both indoors and out. The most common kind of date is a movie date but if you don't want to be cliché, you could try going to an amusement park, going for a walk, going to lunch or dinner, or even something fun like horseback riding for a hike.
I hope you found this article helpful. Remember saying yes to a date is your choice, never feel obligated to give a positive response when you're not ready to start dating. Please let me know what you think about this topic in the comment section and be sure to share the article.
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.