When you say I love you, you say it because you feel it in your heart. You know that you love the person in front of you, so it only makes sense to say it.
That is until they don’t say the same thing back. Or they look shocked. Or they display one of the obvious signs that helps you instantly understand that you’ve uttered those three tiny words just a bit too soon for your relationship, or your significant other.
- 1 How To Recover From Saying I Love You Too Soon
- 2 FAQs
- 3 In Conclusion
How To Recover From Saying I Love You Too Soon
If you already said I love you too soon, it’s okay. Take a deep breath. You can completely recover from this. If you’re scared that you’re going to say it too soon, have a backup plan if you don’t know how they feel. This guarantees that you can make a quick recovery that won’t ruin the relationship.
1. Don’t make it awkward
Once you make it awkward, it only seems to get more awkward. Most of us don’t know what to do when we declare our love for someone and they don’t say they feel the same, or they hesitate for a really long time first. However, having a plan in the back of your mind for how to act if this happens will help you stay smooth.
If your partner doesn’t instantly say it back, laugh it off. Then, give them a kiss and mention something else, such as going to the movies. Your partner will probably feel like a deer caught in the headlights of a car if they aren’t prepared, and aren’t ready. They’ll appreciate you giving them a way out.
2. Don’t take it personally
Different people develop feelings in their own time. If your partner is not ready to say they love you just yet, it doesn’t mean that they will never love you. It also doesn’t mean that they don’t like you. It just means that they aren’t ready to say those three words yet, or they don’t feel as strongly as you do. There is nothing wrong with either of those things.
3. Let it go
Just like you can laugh it off when you say it too soon, you can also let it go. Try not to hold onto hurt feelings over this. If you do, it can have a negative impact on your relationship. Instead, feel proud of yourself for saying what you want to say, and how you feel in your heart. Then, move on.
4. Consider the timing
This is one of the most important things to consider. If you’ve already said it, it’s a bit too late. However, knowing that most people aren’t ready to say those words until a few months into their relationship can help you understand why he didn’t say anything back.
For those of you that haven’t said it yet, remember this before saying it for the first time. Your boyfriend might not have the same feeling if you’ve only been on a few dates. This is too soon. You also want to pick an actual time that is good for him. For example, don’t do it when he is stressed at work.
5. Don’t take it back
If your boyfriend doesn’t express the same feeling as soon as you do, the first idea to come to your head might be to take it back. You could say it was a mistake, and you were just talking to your mother before him. It sounds good, but doing this is not a good thing. If he doesn’t say those three words back, let it go instead. When you take it back, you’re saying you don’t feel that way. It’s lying to both yourself and him.
6. Avoid pressuring him to say it to you
If he doesn’t say it back, don’t pressure him to. Don’t guilt-trip him or make a big deal out of it in an attempt to pressure him either. He’ll say those three words whenever he’s ready to. Pressuring a guy to do things they are not ready to can ruin relationships.
If you want to talk about it with them, try apologizing. Own your words, and tell them that you really do love them. However, you aren’t apologizing for the way you feel. Instead, tell them that you said those words because you meant them, but you understand if they aren’t ready for that in your relationship. You can also apologize if it made them feel uncomfortable.
8. Ask yourself why you said you love them
If you were full of love, you were expressing your feelings. However, if you weren’t, you need to ask yourself why you said you love them. Do you usually say it so soon in relationships? That’s a red flag. Were you caught up in the excitement of the moment? Or do you simply say that you love people a lot, so you just said it? Make sure that you have the right reasons for saying you love them.
9. Show them you love them instead
If you really love them, it might kill you not to say it until they are ready. However, you can show them that you love them instead. Tiny gestures of love, like a random present, can show them that you love them without making things awkward.
Other great ways to show your partner that you love them until they are ready to say those words are:
- Spending more quality time together
- Say I love you by giving massages
- Show affection in your relationship, like hugging, kissing, and holding hands
- Say something sweet instead, like how much you feel like you two are perfect together
- Tell them how amazing they are
Showing a person that you love them is a great way to help the relationship blossom, and to show each other how you feel. When he’s ready to say I love you back, he’ll start to reciprocate those gestures more.
It’s a red flag that you feel pressured to say I love you. It could also mean that you have low self-esteem, or that you are trying to get something from the other person. When a guy said I love you too soon, it could also be him trying to sleep with you.
Most people have waited at least five dates, or a few months into the relationship before they have said I love you. However, as long as you have known each other long enough to be sure that your feelings for each other are genuine, there’s nothing wrong with saying this to each other.
You can complement each other. Tell them they’re the best thing to happen to you. Speaking on how perfect your relationship is another great idea. Tell him that you two go together like peanut butter and jelly or two puzzle pieces. You can say that you’ve never met someone like them before.
Men do fall in love faster, and they fall a lot harder than women. They also have fewer requirements than women, which makes it easier to find someone that they feel that way about. According to studies, men are also more likely than women to fall in love at first sight.
Watch his actions. When a man loves you, he’ll show you more than he’ll tell you. He will also respect you, treat you with kindness, and make sure to do things that you like. He might take you on dates, give you massages, and ask how your day was. He’ll also stare at you.
If you’ve ever said I love you too soon, you already know it can be nerve-racking. You can make a quick recovery by laughing it off, changing the subject, or apologizing if you made them uncomfortable. Have you ever said it too soon? How did you recover?
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.