How to Love Someone (53 Ways to Show Genuine Love)

Special occasion or not, it is always nice to go all out for the person you love. Most times, it does not have to make sense or be one of those grand acts, simply meeting one of your partner’s needs is a good way to go. 

Every relationship has its own bumps along the way, so once in a while, it’s important for your SO to feel loved. That is the only way to recharge and have a viable reason to go on.

As I implied before, you will be surprised at how simple some of these acts are, the goal is to ensure that your love lives on. With that in mind, here are some points on how to love someone.


How Do You Love Someone? (53 Ways To Love)

1. Show interest

If there was a manual on how to love someone, it would start out by saying you should show interest in them. You don’t have to be that woman that likes soccer because he does, but it doesn’t help to buy a jersey or cheer for his favorite team. Step out of your comfort zone every once in a while and acquaint yourself with what is going on in their world.

It may seem mundane and repetitive to ask them how their day is going, but when you love someone, you should know. The day you stop checking in on them is the day things go downhill.

2. Show physical affection

Your mind went straight to sex, right? Well, that's not all there is to physical affection. It could be something as simple as holding hands, and the end goal should not always be sex. Besides holding hands, there's hugging, spooning, giving massages, or simply touching a part of their body in a non-sexual way. 

I'm not saying you can't straight out just have sex, but sometimes, break the mold and just enjoy his body without seeking sexual gratification. 

3. Be creative

Hollywood has already implanted this image of what romantic love should look like. The bouquets of roses, the boom boxes held above the head, and let's not forget the declarations of love at the airport. 

These are not bad ideas, but they may not suit your significant other. Search your mind, you know this person to some extent regardless of how long or short the relationship is. Be unique as you look for ways to show your man that you love him, try to discover his love language, and run with it. If you want to bounce ideas off Hollywood movies, then do it sparingly. 

4. Talk more often

This goes without saying, but some people get to a point where they no longer communicate and that's sad. Especially in long-term relationships, it's important to talk often, because the razzle-dazzle stage of falling in love is far past. You have to seek ways to fall in love with your partner's mind, day after day. 

Let's say he's been your husband for 20 years, you may be wondering what you could possibly learn about them. Well, you certainly aren't the same woman you were all those years, which means he isn't the same man. New experiences have shaped you both, so hinge on that and spark some conversation. 

5. Celebrate

Those first few years, you may have the urge to celebrate everything; one-week anniversaries, half birthdays, and Valentine's day. Honey, I'm writing this to say, those sentiments will sizzle down, but, they shouldn't completely go down the drain. 

Sure, your half birthday every year may become a pain to celebrate, but try to make your milestones as a couple. Relationships are difficult and the fact that you're still at it with kindness and dedication is an achievement, don't play it down. 

6. Hang out

Sometimes you're so carried away trying to maintain a healthy relationship that you forget to just hang out like you used to. Honey, you don't have to make a big deal out of it, simply do the dishes together or work out together. Doing these seemingly mundane things together opens up a new layer in your relationship. 

Remember, your love life could suffer a serious blow if you don't do the everyday things together. You can't live out a steamy romance novel day in day out, but you can look for the little things to enjoy together. 

7. Look away from your screens

It's hard to do this these days, considering that everything functions on screens. Technology has made our lives so much easier, but it's often at the detriment of personal relationships. 

With that in mind, it's not a bad idea to keep your smart devices out of sight whenever you're ‘sharing time.' So, when you're having dinner or discussing politics before bed, put your phones down and really concentrate on what the other person is saying. 

8. Don't use information against them

In an ideal relationship, your partner should be your confidant, so you should be able to tell each other things you can't tell anyone else. I'm not encouraging you to share secrets to the detriment of others. 

But, if your partner shares something silly or crazy, Honey, don't use those facts against them in the future. Don't bring it up in an argument, don't blurt it out to try to prove a point either. You don't have to take a knee and give your word, just show kindness by not using things against them.

9. Send flirty/dirty messages

send flirty dirty messages

This is one sure way to keep the sparks flying, even after years of being together. Send him something racy while he's at work and best believe that he'll be racing back home to meet you. 

You can't live out your days being good all the time, and if you do, I assure you that it will get boring really quickly. So, put all that prudence aside once in a while and don sole naughty girl panties, you'll be surprised at how well they fit. 

10. Take care of him

One of the most important ways to show love and affection is by taking care of your partner. This human body gets worn out sometimes, so don't wait for him to be hospitalized before you make your man a bowl of soup or give him a back rub to ease some tension. 

If you really want to show how much you love someone, be there for them when it's difficult. Wait on them when they need it most and best believe they'll be assured of your love. 

11. Dish out the compliments

After a while, it may seem like a lot of work to notice a new haircut or a new pair of shoes. That's understandable, but then again, it's important to appreciate the ways your partner tries to look good for themselves and even you. 

Honey, of course, the fact he's still grooming himself this much all these years has a little something to do with you. So, make a conscious effort to tell him how nice he looks or appreciate him for a job well done. 

12. Bring out the chef within

They say the best way to win a man over is to feed him… or something like that. So, if you know your way around a kitchen then this is a solid way to meet some of his more base needs. 

Perhaps, you could call up his mother or close friends to ask for a list of his favorite meals. It will do wonders for your love life if you cook up a delicious meal and enjoy it with him. This is the kind of surprise that really drives things home. 

13. Order some food

All is not lost if you cannot cook, you can still prove you love someone by knowing the right take-out place. The goal is to feed him something delicious and if you can’t cook, you may not achieve that. 

Your relationship will thrive if you’re honest enough to order out so you can enjoy some good food together. At the end of the day, you’ll bond over some tasty morsels and leave your husband feeling good in the process.

14. Go out for dinner

Yes, there is a theme here, but the goal remains the same; feed this man and make him happy. Do not wait for an anniversary or a special occasion to take him out for a nice meal. You have the rest of your lives to do boring stuff, so spice it up with a nice meal every now and then. Relationships thrive when you break the mold and do something out of the ordinary on

15. Be their safe haven

Try as much as you can to not be the problem, but a solution. You want your husband to see you as a slice of peace in this chaotic world. So, show him kindness when it seems like the cards are stacked against him. Give him reasons to confide in you without feeling judged or unloved. If you go down this path, you won’t only earn his gratitude, but his loyalty and respect as well. 

16. Listen

Since we all come from different backgrounds and have different notions of what it means to love someone, it is important to listen. Listening to your boyfriend or husband is one major way to make him feel loved. 

When you listen to assimilate and not offer guidance, it makes it easier for your relationship to grow stronger. Honey, when you love someone you want to see things from their end. It’s the only way you’ll fully understand their love language and how to love them as a whole.

17. Don't stop working on your relationship

The moment you stop putting in the work, things are going to go south. It's alright to get comfortable within your relationship, but not so much that you don't try anymore. Honey, he may not be able to take your breath away or anticipate your needs the way he used to, but that should not spell doom. 

You can still interact based on your love language, or look got other ways to revive the flame whenever it burns out. It's not just easy, but the important thing is to keep working at it. 

18. Don't lose sight of how amazing he is

dont lose sight of how amazing he is

It's easy to get caught up in how different things are in your relationship compared to the beginning. You are only human, it is normal for you to miss all that, but don't demonize him in the process. 

When you love someone, it's still possible to see the little ways they consider you despite all the clutter that comes with life. Make it easier by writing down all the considerate things he does for some time, you'll see that he hasn't stopped trying. Your love has simply matured

19. Find common interests

No one is expecting you to get lost in your partner or lose your sense of self for them. Nevertheless, you can find things you enjoy doing together. When I say ‘find', I mean that you should go out of your way to figure out what your partner and you have in common. 

Don't wait for things to pop up because every relationship is proactive. This is all a part of putting in the work, things aren't magically going to fall into place just because you really want them to. So, show your partner some love by figuring out what you can do as a couple. 

20. Take their advice

Don't just grudgingly take their advice, also appreciate it. Sure, it's annoying sometimes especially if you are simply looking for a listening ear. But look at things this way, he cares enough to know you and equally apply that knowledge in creative ways to solve your problems. 

So, whether it is a life-changing issue or a minute thing, appreciate the fact that you have someone who cares enough to give you a positive nudge because that's a great way to show your love. 

21. Be patient

This may be one of the most difficult ways to show love because let's face it, Honey, we all want things to happen on our time. Unfortunately, our lives beat to their own drum and though we have some semblance of control, some things, like love, are radical. As such, you need to be patient with your partner, because they will definitely try your patience. 

But as long as you know deep down that this is the man you love and you're in it for the long haul, then you need to take it easy and wait for him to come around. Remember, this kind of patience is reserved for people you know love you back. Don't wait for anyone who's in it to string you along. 

22. Don't try to change them, be part of their journey

Change is one of the most uncomfortable things the human mind has to go through, that's why it's so hard for people to turn a new leaf. If you love someone, then you should not bother trying to change them. 

Sure, you want them to grow, but you can't force anyone to do things they don't want to. Instead, be a part of their journey of self-development because that's the only way you'll realize the change in a safe space. 

23. Make their happiness a priority

When you love someone, their happiness and general wellbeing are important to you. You should not only meet their physical needs but raise them up emotionally too. 

The way relationships are wired, once one person is down, the other person is affected unless it's built on lies. Sure, we are all responsible for our own happiness, but if you love somebody, they don’t have to say a word, you already know they need a pick-me-up. 

24. Believe in them

Supporting a person is quite different from believing in them. Think of it this way, the two work hand-in-hand to ensure that you are there for your partner in ways they need you. Don't just support them when they embark on new things, also believe that they can get things done. One supportive word from you can spur them to do things they never believed they could and if that's not love, nothing really is. 

25. Choose them

Honey, I'm not asking you to ditch an important meeting to go gallivanting with your partner; that's not love, it's recklessness. But, you should choose them over the girls or a day out once in a while. 

Quality time is one love language many people enjoy, so don't neglect any chance to spend more time with the man you love. Also, it's just cute, and best believe the cuter you are the more you'll be able to get your way. 

26. Experience things together

It is nice to exchange gifts, but you can never replace an experience that you share with someone you love. So, why not have the best of both worlds. Get him gifts that you can experience together, especially if his love language is quality time

It could be anything from game tickets to plane tickets, just think about what he would really appreciate. The best part is that you get a front seat to watch him enjoy it all. 

27. Be honest

be honest

Every relationship needs honesty on both ends, if not you're going to end up resenting each other. I'm not saying you should use that as an excuse to hurt your partner's feelings, the only time you can drive it home hard is when they simply can't be reached. 

And even then, you need to tread carefully so you don't drive them over the edge. If you truly love someone, let them know the truth and hope that's enough to make things better. 

28. Argue with love

This probably sounds contradictory, but if you love someone enough, the aim of arguing isn't to win or show them how much smarter you are. For the most part, you need to refrain from pointing fingers and put the spotlight on what they need. Also, don't shut down the argument just because you feel cornered, it's just going to come up in another form. In everything you do and say, respect the other person. 

29. Be accountable

You can't say you're in love with a person if you can't take responsibility for your actions. You're going to have issues spring up between you and if you keep allotting blame to one party, Honey, it's not going to end well. Altogether, you need to own up to your mistakes, no matter how difficult it seems. 

Believe me, when I say it is quite difficult, especially if you hate being wrong, but it shows that you are centered and you're ready for all the craziness relationships to spark up. So, if you love them, don't let them feel as if everything is their fault, it takes two to tango. 

30. Ask them what their love language is

Observation will only get you so far, sometimes you've got to ask to get all the information you need. So, don't feel reluctant to ask them what their love language is and how they want to be loved in particular. Yes, it is a broad question, so don't expect to get an answer right off the bat. With the information you gather, you'll be able to find new ways to love them every single day. 

31. Respect the people they love

You don't have to love their family or close friends, but you need to respect them. You see, if you have an abrasive relationship with the people your partner cares about, then it's bound to put a strain on your love life. It may not be today or next week, but it will pop up soon enough. Also, if you make an effort to get along with their loved ones, it's more likely that they'll reciprocate. 

32. Compromise

You can't get your way all the time, it's just not the way life is. The same goes with your relationship, Honey, if he's always letting you have your way, then something is gruesomely wrong. So, prepare yourself for days when you'll have to back down even if you're right. It's not worth it to always emerge as the ‘winner', in fact, that's not winning at all. 

33. Keep in touch throughout the day

You don't have to flood their phone with calls and messages all in the name of love. But, you can send periodic messages that show them you are thinking about them. It does not have to be anything serious, it could be something someone did at work, or you could share a funny video you saw during your break. 

Altogether, it's just a way of letting them know you love them and cannot go through the whole day without reaching out.

34. Defend them

Knights in shining armor may dominate the spotlight, but you can ride in there like Xena the warrior princess to defend your man too. This is no excuse to emasculate him or make him feel little. 

But if you see that he's being treated wrongfully or talked about behind his back, show those haters that they can't take advantage especially when you're there. No one should feel comfortable ripping on your SO when you are there, show them why Xena was such a badass. 

35. Go on a getaway together

The great thing about his is that you don't really have to go anywhere to enjoy yourselves this way. Simply create a getaway experience if you don't have the funds to whisk him away to an exotic location. 

For instance, if he's a fan of the orient, you can throw something together and experience it together. But if you can actually grab some tickets and zoom off together, it's really not a crazy idea when love is involved. Scratch that, love is crazy, so just make like Nike and do it.

36. Let your guard down

let your guard down

Love can make you vulnerable, and that is something you have to learn to be OK with. Sure, you have always prided yourself on the fact that you are a strong and independent woman. Here's the thing, love can tear all that down leaving you stark naked. 

Just keep telling yourself that it's OK to let your guard down when it's for some you love. With the right person, it can be the most fulfilling thing in the world. 

37. Be spiritual together

If you're both spiritual people, then this works perfectly. One of the most intimate bonds you can have with others is on a spiritual platform. Pray together, study your various religious texts together and have compelling conversations, meditate together, and reach new spiritual heights as a team. At the end of it all, you would have shared an intimate part of yourself with someone you care deeply about. 

38. Be grateful for the little things

It's easy to get excited about the big stuff; let's say he buys you a car or whisks you off on a romantic getaway out of the blues. In that case, it's really easy to show gratitude. But what about when he gives you a back rub or takes out the garbage without you asking him. 

You've got to love a man who does those things for you and, even more, you've go to appreciate him. All that appreciation will ensure that he does it again and again without feeling used. 

39. Be observant

Don't you just love it when you've been battling knots and tension in your shoulders all week and all of a sudden he gifts you an all-expense-paid spa day? Well, he went out of his way to observe and anticipate your needs before you even articulated them. 

At that moment, didn't you just love him more? Well, that's how he'll feel if you are observant about his needs. Don't be that person who sits back to collect all the time without doing anything thoughtful in return.

40. Make their life easier

You don't have to do anything monumental to make his life easier. Again, those seemingly little things that make up each day go a long way. So, pay for his car to be washed while he's asleep, or make him a cup of coffee just the way he likes it before he heads out to work. These minute things may not seem like a big deal to you but they'll make your SO's life a lot easier. 

41. Clean up after yourself

Ladies, it's easy to pride yourself on being neat and tidy under the umbrella of how your gender is meant to behave. But let's get real, do you take your hair out of the drain once you shower? 

Do you put things back where you found them and make an effort to leave places as neat as they were when you first stumbled across them? Let me tell you now, this can be downright annoying and is a leading cause of arguments in a relationship. So, fly that ‘love' flag by respecting the space you share. 

42. Discuss and act on sexual fantasies

Vanilla sex is nice, but you aren't going to enjoy yourself that much if you don't tell your partner what you like. Lots of people think that it's selfish to demand your fantasies met in bed, but on the contrary, it's thoughtful, intimate, and liberating for both you and your partner. 

Don't hold back, the worst that could happen is him not being up for it. Then what? You move on and keep having interesting sex that makes you closer. 

43. Share responsibilities

Whether you are simply cohabitating or you're married with kids, it is quite important to allot responsibilities and take them very seriously. If you have to burst out a chore wheel, do it wholeheartedly and do it with love. 

When it comes to kids, you are both parents, so a little help regardless of who stays home with them more is appreciated. I'm saying this because most times it's the ladies who do the lion share with the kids, but if your family is a bit different then lend a helping hand when you can.

44. Try out things they enjoy

Picture this, he's a vegan and you're borderline carnivorous, on paper, that relationship should not work. You probably don't want to change your dietary habits and he won't either, but there is a middle ground. 

Every now and then, try out some do the food he likes, after all, he's the one with the dietary restrictions. This doesn't only go for food-related issues, if there's anything you could try out with him, then go ahead, it shows that you love him. 


45. Give him something sentimental

give him something sentimental

Grand gifts and actions are a hoot, but nothing quite beats sentimental gifts. There is something deep about knowing so much about a person that you know how to touch their heart with a single gift. I'm not saying you should not go all out once in a while, but you could also dial it down and get them something that they will cherish for as long as they live. 

46. Date night is a must-have

Life will often get so intense that you don't know how to pull the brakes, that's just a fact. But in the midst of it all, you need to maintain the bond you have with your SO. One way to keep the flame burning is to have frequent date nights scheduled all through the month. 

That way, if you don't really see them or get much downtime regularly, you have that night to look forward to. Don't let life separate you from the one you love, it's very hard to get it all back once the bond is weakened. 

47. Love yourself

Wait, this article isn't about self-love, is it? No, but if you can't love yourself then you will have nothing to offer anyone else. So, before you cast out your fishing rod and reel someone in, make sure you know what you are getting yourself into. 

Do you have the capacity to reciprocate their feelings? If you don't care much for yourself, then the answer will always be no. Recognize the wonderful and lovable person within, then love them fiercely. Once that's done, you'll have no problem loving another person. 

48. Make a commitment

In the initial throes of love, it's easy to get caught up in the euphoria. Well, that's not a bad thing, it feels great when you're still in that honeymoon period and you're so into him that your heart wants to burst. 

Here's the thing, there's a time limit on that experience, you're going to get to a point where things won't be peachy or as exciting every day. The true test of your affection is the commitment you make to them when that spark isn't going crazy all over the place. 

49. Forgive

Boy, oh boy, you have to go into every boy-girl situation knowing that you will ultimately annoy each other. Sometimes, you'll get so upset you will have to talk yourself out of walking away. But that's the nature of the life we live, no one is going to be perfect 100% of the time. 

If they seem too good to be true, then they probably are. So, get your heart ready to forgive over and over again, the same way you'd want him to forgive you when things get out of hand. 

50. Accept them for who they are

Many people have a notion of the kind of person they want to fall in love with. No matter how close he is to fitting the bill, there will always be an area he can't meet up with. My advice to you is to accept him for who he is, it's a great way to show your love. 

51. Revive your inner child

I'm not telling you to be immature, you simply need to be playful and giddy once in a while. All work and no play will breed ill tidings in your relationship, so don't forget to stop and let your hair down with your partner. 

52. Let them into your world

Share your interests with them and let them know what makes you tick. Chances are, if your partner knows you well enough, they'll be able to love you more. If they love you more, you'll be more willing to reciprocate, so don't hold back, let them see how beautiful you are. 

53. Tell them

Those three words, ‘I love you', go a long way. Simply saying them is one of the best ways to express your love for that special someone. 


What are 5 ways to show love?

While there are no set ways when it comes to how to love someone, Chapman narrowed it down to 5 ways. Each love language is special and meaningful in its own way. There’s quality time, words of affirmation, receiving gifts, physical touch, and acts of service. These are forms in which love can be experienced and expressed.

How do you feel when you love someone?

It can be the best or worst feeling depending on the nature of your relationship with the person you love. For one, there is this feeling of nervous excitement, it doesn’t make sense, but loving someone does not have to. There is always this sense of euphoria and constant giddiness that follows.

Can you teach yourself to love someone?

Yes, it is possible to teach yourself how to love someone, but it is not often easy. But it all starts on the platform of having shared values and goals. You could equally learn their love language and communicate yours; as long as you find reasons to show care and kindness, learning how to love someone is no problem.

How do you express love?

Start by being polite; gratitude and remorse go a long way when needed. You should equally show kindness in relationships, it sounds basic, but most people forget it. Also, say nice things to your partner and back them up with actions because loving someone is about how you make them feel. They can only feel loved if you balance words and actions.

Do I really love him?

No relationship is perfect, but if you really love someone, it is not hard to empathize with them and feel the need to help them out. Altogether, you just want to make them feel like there’s always someone who has their back. On the other hand, if you find yourself constantly making excuses for loving someone, there is a problem somewhere.

In Conclusion

Loving someone can often take you out of your comfort zone, but when you’re with the person you love, it is all worth it. Though it's not particularly rocket science, the notion of how to love someone often eludes some people. 

I hope that this article has given you a nudge in the right direction and that the idea of loving someone is a lot less daunting now. Do let me know what you think in the comment box below. Also, one good turn deserves another, so share this with anyone who needs it. 


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