If you wonder how to initiate sex, you are not alone. You may be surprised to hear that many people are interested in knowing the answer to that question. Luckily, in this article, we are going to teach you how to initiate sex with your partner.
If you are hoping your partner will become as horny as you are, there are things you can do. Roleplaying is one idea. Foreplay is another important idea to keep in mind. You don’t have to play mind games with your partner to get him or her in the mood, either. You may be surprised to learn that there are many easy ways to initiate sex and move things into the bedroom.
With these tips, your partner will surely consent to have sex with you or at least desire your naked body that much more. Think about what you want out of your sexual relationships before you go changing anything about yourself, though. You want to be genuine and honest with communication.
Get your man or woman in the mood or in bed at least with these tips that will make him or her as horny as you are! Let’s get started!
- 1 Why Should You Initiate Sex?
- 2 Why Is It Hard To Initiate Sex?
- 3 How Do You Initiate Sex (25 Sexy Ways)
- 3.1 1. Be direct
- 3.2 2. Ask if your partner is in the mood
- 3.3 3. Dress for success
- 3.4 4. Initiate sex in writing
- 3.5 5. Sleep naked
- 3.6 6. Put on a sexy movie
- 3.7 7. Use your body language to say you are in the mood
- 3.8 8. Wear lingerie
- 3.9 9. Make out
- 3.10 10. Play hard to get
- 3.11 11. Make a hot date
- 3.12 12. Don’t expect perfect conditions
- 3.13 13. Give them a lingering hug
- 3.14 14. Give them a massage
- 3.15 15. Cook a romantic dinner
- 3.16 16. Laugh at his or her dumb jokes
- 3.17 17. Cuddle
- 3.18 18. Try something new
- 3.19 19. Do something sweet
- 3.20 20. Show off your best features
- 3.21 21. Flirt
- 3.22 22. Kiss him on the back of the neck
- 3.23 23. Take a mini-vacation
- 3.24 24. Dance for him
- 3.25 25. Shower together
- 4 Bonus Tips to Initiate Sex
- 5 FAQs
- 6 In Conclusion
Why Should You Initiate Sex?
You may think that you don’t need to know ways to initiate sex because you just aren’t comfortable initiating sex, or it’s not an issue in your relationship. Trust me; not everyone feels the same about each other all of the time. In other words, there will be times when your partner is not in the mood – no matter what he or she is like at this very moment.
It’s a good idea to get to know how to get the ball rolling with stuff in the bedroom because there may come a day when you have to know ways to initiate sex because you have to do it! You may not be comfortable initiating sex, but that’s why you are reading this article – to get the ball rolling! You can get your partner in the mood if he or she is not feeling physical – sometimes!
All of the tips in the world won’t work in the bedroom all of the time if your partner is not in the mood. Realize that we all have different libidos and feel desired in different ways. You may feel horny at times when your partner just doesn’t want to be physical. You’ll need to know how to communicate your desire for sex to your partner, so stay tuned for the rest of this blog post!
Why Is It Hard To Initiate Sex?
Many people find that initiating sex is not easy. You don’t usually want to walk up to your partner and start dirty talk if he or she is not in the mood for sex. Initiating sex when your partner doesn’t want it can be a challenge. What if he doesn’t ever seem to want anything physical? What if he hates dirty talk or finds dirty talk to be offensive? If so, that’s not the way to go.
However, there are other ways you can start initiating sex. It will take some confidence, though. Healthline suggests that you throw out the rule book of what you already know about initiating sex and start from scratch. It doesn’t have to be awkward, says the article. If you have a great level of communication with your partner, you can actually enjoy talking about it.
Let your partner know that you want to start initiating sex but don’t know what turns them on. Ask for guidance and direction. They will probably gladly tell you what works for them and what doesn’t. Your partner may like sex toys or enjoy massages. Maybe he or she wants you to start kissing his or her neck. Honest communication can make initiating sex much easier!
How Do You Initiate Sex (25 Sexy Ways)
1. Be direct
Be specific with what you want. Don’t assume that your partner can read your mind. No one is really a mindreader, so it’s important that you are open and honest with your partner. If you really want to shock him or her, consider just jumping them out of the blue! You will certainly grab their attention that way and perhaps even get your way!
2. Ask if your partner is in the mood
Of course, probably the most obvious answer is to just ask them directly if they want to have sex. This isn’t always the most romantic or sexy way of going about this, but it does have a tendency to work.
If you’d like to sidestep this, you could always hint that you are horny and want sex. If you have a coded language with your partner, now is the time to use it! For example, if you use the word bananas for sex, talk about really wanting to purchase bananas right now, and hopefully, your partner will get the hint and join you for bedroom time.
3. Dress for success
One clear way you can indicate you want to have sex is by dressing nicely. Put on something you know your partner loves! Wear his or her favorite outfit. Better yet, do your hair and makeup and make yourself a hottie, so you are irresistible. You might even try doing the thing or things that your partner loves the most, too!
For example, if your partner likes it when you do yoga, wash the car, or do the dishes, take on one of those tasks and watch them drool. You will surely catch them in the mood with those actions!
4. Initiate sex in writing
With text messaging and emailing, you have a lot of options to be creative with your request for sex. Just ask them when they would like to schedule a meeting – that’s talking in code for their sake or anyone who reads the email or text!!
5. Sleep naked
Not much needs to be said for this tip; just give it a try and see if it works on your man or woman!
6. Put on a sexy movie
This could be a movie with lots of sex in it or even a porn movie. All you have to do is suggest that you watch it as a couple and hope that it turns your partner on!
7. Use your body language to say you are in the mood
Sometimes, you need a little flirting to send the right message to your partner. Smile often, flip your hair, or move your body slowly as you take sexy actions, like picking something up off the floor. Picture yourself dancing as you do it, and you’ll do just fine.
8. Wear lingerie
This is a key sign to a guy that a girl is in the mood for sex! Usually, this will turn a guy on and make him want to have time in the bedroom! Pick something up at a local lingerie store or purchase something online to surprise your sweetheart!
9. Make out
You know how to do this. Start with a small kiss and turn it into a full makeout session!
10. Play hard to get
Playing hard to get is actually easier than it sounds. You just stay really busy and tease just a little bit. You want to send a clear signal that you are interested in sex, but you also don’t want to come across as too strong.
11. Make a hot date
Go on a romantic date at a nice restaurant or hit the movies. Make the night special. If it’s Christmastime, you could go see Christmas lights around town. Do something that means something special to the two of you.
12. Don’t expect perfect conditions
It’s never going to be “just right.” Perfect just doesn’t exist, especially if you have pets and kids. You’ll have to settle for second-best. That doesn’t mean you are settling on a second-rate partner; you are just settling for making your own invention of perfect conditions – whatever that means for the two of you!
13. Give them a lingering hug
If you let your partner know that you are wanting some affection, they will understand that you also may want some sexual intercourse! Just give them a hint here and there like this.
14. Give them a massage
Break out the hot oils and get sexy! It’s time to show your partner that you are really ready for some time alone with him or her.
15. Cook a romantic dinner
A beautiful candlelit dinner can send a clear signal that you are wanting sex! Get creative, follow a recipe, and make the house smell amazing!
16. Laugh at his or her dumb jokes
Remember why he or she fell in love with you! Did they love your sense of humor or the fact that you would laugh at their jokes – even the dumb ones? Make them fall in love with you all over again!
Cuddling can lead to making out, which can obviously lead to sex! Put on a long, great movie and see where the night takes the two of you!
18. Try something new
This may be sex toys or wearing a wig. You just never know since this is different for everyone! Get creative and surprise your loved one!
19. Do something sweet
Making a huge sweet gesture is a great thing and will surely let your partner know how much you love them. It may make them also want to get close to – as in intimacy!
20. Show off your best features
Do you have killer legs? What does your partner love the most about you? Make sure you accentuate that feature! If they think your breasts are nicely made, wear a push-up bra and a dress that accents your breasts nicely!
Remember what it was like when you were dating? Try giving that a shot again. Be flirtatious with your partner. Give him or her the treatment they deserve. This may mean nonverbal cues or it could mean saying some compliments to get them in the mood.
22. Kiss him on the back of the neck
Many guys love this, so go ahead and give it a shot!
23. Take a mini-vacation
Plan something romantic and watch how things change in the atmosphere between the two of you. You may notice with a change in scenery that your mood changes, too. You two may fall in love with one another all over again because of being in a new location!
24. Dance for him
Many guys love it when a girl gives them a lap dance or does a choreographed striptease dance. Practice makes perfect, here, so work on it, and you’ll succeed pretty easily!
25. Shower together
This is a great suggestion if it’s something that could indicate sex for your partner!
Bonus Tips to Initiate Sex
26. Schedule sex
With children’s school schedules and a million different events coming up, it’s really hard to find the time to have sex. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to schedule it at a time you know you will not be interrupted. If you must turn your cellular devices off during this time so that it is just the two of you in the bedroom. Think about each other’s needs and make the time for sex!
27. Learn your partner’s love language
There are 5 love languages – physical touch, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, and quality time. If you understand what your partner’s love language is, you will be better equipped to know how to initiate sex. You’ll understand what they need and can match their expectations. Check out the book or website for more information so that you can find out what yours is!
28. Be patient and understanding
Everyone has different sex drives, so it’s important to keep that in mind when you are wanting sexy time, and your partner is not. You might try being very patient and understanding with your partner and what he or she needs to have a fun and sexy time with you. It might be best to wait until another time if they truly do not want sex at the time that you do. Try to understand.
29. Talk about expectations and boundaries
Everyone needs different things to get turned on. We are all different. Remember that the next time you try initiating sex. Kissing the back of his shoulder may not turn him on, but taking a shower together may do the trick. Discuss what expectations and boundaries your partner has when it comes to sexy time. Remember that we all work in different ways!
30. Start in the morning
Some people say that it is best to have sex in the morning because you are fresh and awake. By the end of the day, you’ve been through an ordeal. You may be too exhausted to be sexy or think about having sex with your partner. Consider having morning sex to start your day off right! This may also help your partner have an excellent day!
31. Have an open and honest conversation
It’s a good idea to talk about sex if you are having trouble with that in your relationship. You might want to discuss what is turning him or her off and what is working well. Tackle one problem at a time, though. Be positive in your tone and attitude, too. Don’t nag or harp on a past mistake that happened during sex. No one wants to be reminded of what they did wrong.
If your partner says that he or she likes it when you kiss their cheek, just do that more! If they are unsure as to what really turns them on, you might have to try a variety of different things to see what works best. You might want to try asking your partner about his or her fantasies to see what they think about the most. Maybe there is something new you can try! Give it a shot!
32. Set the mood
You might try setting the mood by playing romantic music or sexy music for your partner. Sometimes, songs that talk about sex work well for this sort of situation. Think about what your partner would most like. If a candle-lit room is out of the question, try dimming the lights or putting on lingerie. He or she may find the efforts you are making to be very appealing.
You could be straight-up crazy and go for his pants, but he may find more pleasure if he is approached subtly. You could also touch his inner thighs; the inner thighs are a hot zone for guys! Also, invite him to take a shower with you! Just see what happens!
Many guys want to have sex all of the time, so when you respond that you are feeling the same way, they will usually consent to have sex right away. Some guys won’t consent because they like to tease! If you walk around naked, he’ll surely consent, though!
Sometimes, you have to try something new in the bedroom. Try introducing sex toys or making him feel desired in some other way. You might try kissing him from head to toe. If he’s in the mood, he’ll surely find that to be pretty hot! Give it a shot!
If one person is not in the mood, it can be awkward to discuss sex. If you work on your relationship together, you will both want to have sex at the same time eventually; you may just have to find a time when the mood is right. Don’t be afraid!
You can increase the desire to talk about and have sex by making the mood more romantic. Have a hot date with your partner. Hot dating is the key to making a relationship last. Consider having a romantic candle-lit dinner to spice up the mood, too!
Do you have to take charge always in your sex life? What have your relationships been like? Have you had to initiate sex a lot? Have you ever had to break up with someone because they weren’t interested in sex or weren’t in the mood enough? Play it out in the comments!
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.