You have been with your husband for a long time, he is an amazing father to your children and he has always been kind and caring. However, recently you have noticed that he has started telling lies. Whether he is lying about small or bigger aspects of his life, it is important to have a serious conversation with him to find out what is going on.
He may be lying to protect his own selfish feelings, or to protect you from getting hurt because of something that he has done. Perhaps he is too proud to own up to his mistakes. However, no relationship will survive unless it is built on communication and honesty. As soon as these things start to fail, your relationship will begin to suffer greatly.
Whether he realizes that you know he’s lying or not, it is important to do something about it. Don’t ignore the situation until it becomes so bad that he says something that he cannot take back. While it is not easy to talk about such things, it is important that you do. It is important to rebuild your communication so that this no longer happens.
Keep reading to find out how to deal with a lying partner.
How To Deal With A Lying Husband
Perhaps your husband started telling white lies and got away with it, then he began to tell lies about bigger and more serious things, and now it seems like he is unable to stop and it has become a habit for him to lie to you. Whether he is hiding something or not, it is important to get to the bottom of this situation and to figure out what to do next.
If you have spoken to your husband about his tendencies to lie to you and he has promised to tell the truth but never keeps his promise, it may be time to think about walking away. Without honesty and trust, no relationship is going to be happy and healthy. If you cannot ask your husband a question without him giving you a dishonest answer, something is wrong.
It can get to the point where you think that your husband no longer cares about you or your relationship, because why else would he keep lying to you. While this is likely not the case, it is important to do something about it before it is too late. Sit down with your husband and talk deeply about your issues and figure out how to fix them together.
1. Try To Understand
While being lied to is one of the most awful experiences, it is important to try to understand the situation from your partner’s perspective. It is likely that he has begun lying for a reason, and if that reason is a valid one, it is important to understand. He may not be trying to hurt or upset you by lying but for whatever reason, he may have no choice.
Have a meaningful conversation with your partner about the situation and try to find the reason behind the lies that he is telling. It is human nature to lie, so it is important that you give him the benefit of the doubt before you say something to him that you will later regret. Try to sort out the situation before it is too late and the lies become too deep.
Your partner may have begun to lie because of a breakdown in communication in your relationship already. If he believes that he can no longer be open and honest to you about his emotions and feelings, he may have started lying instead. Make sure that you are always open and honest with each other about everything in your life and relationship.
If your partner comes to you with an issue or a worry about your partnership, make sure that you are open to listening to what he has to say. If you shut him down immediately if he tries to talk to you, he may begin to lie to you in the future instead. No partnership will last if it is not built on open communication and honesty.
3. He Thinks Small Lies Are Okay
Your partner may be lying because he thinks that small lies about little things are okay. However, if he continues to lie, he might start telling lies about bigger issues. Thus, it is important to make it clear to your partner that any lie, no matter how small is not okay. If he continues to keep telling lies you may lose the trust you once shared.
If you have noticed that your partner has started to tell little lies every now and again, it is important to deal with the situation straight away. If you leave it for too long, it may become an ingrained habit that he will never be able to lose. If you want to enjoy a long and happy partnership, don’t ignore this situation.
4. Consider The Lies He Is Telling
When your partner has been lying in a marriage and you want him to start telling the truth, make sure to think about the type of lies that he has been telling in order to determine how you deal with the situation. If your partner has only told little lies about small topics, it is not necessary to start a big argument or conflict over it, merely mention it to him.
However, if you have already told him that you are unhappy with the little lies he has been telling and he has not made an effort to start telling the truth, it is time to have a more serious conversation about what you want from your marriage. If it has become a habit that he wants to break, but cannot, consider seeing a therapist together.
5. He Is Hiding Something
If your partner never would lie in the past and now he has started avoided telling you the truth about many aspects of his life, it may be that he is hiding something about how he is spending his time. It is important that you avoid jumping to conclusions in these situations as you may end up saying something that you may later regret.
If your husband lies to you about major aspects of your life together, things like how he spends his day or where he goes in the evening, it is important to get to the bottom of it before it becomes too serious. If left for too long, you may never be able to fix this situation and your marriage may fail.
6. Consider Your Own Issues
Make sure to consider how you react every time that your partner tells you the truth about something. If you are wondering why my partner tells lies to me? Consider whether it could be your reaction to him telling you the truth. If you always turn situations into an argument or a big deal, this may explain why he finds it hard, to tell the truth.
7. Work Together
It may be the case that your partner would want to change his ways, even if he struggles to. Thus, it is important that you work together to change this situation. It is positive that your partner wants to make a change and it is likely that he just has a hard time breaking his habit. Be there for him and try to understand even though it may be hard.
Communicate with one another and work together to come up with a plan on how to proceed. Consider getting outside help if it is necessary.
If your partner keeps being secretive with you, it is important that you don’t ignore the situation and pretend that everything is okay, when it is not. If you ignore the situation for long enough, you may never be able to fix it and regain the trust in your relationship. Make sure to communicate with your husband about how his lying is making you feel.
Lying can ultimately ruin a marriage. While initial white lies about small things seem unimportant, they likely will gradually grow into more serious ones about bigger topics. Once it becomes a habit, you will not be able to stop lying to one another. Without trust in your partner, it is likely that your relationship will start to break down.
If your husband is secretive or has started to lie to you, it is important to deal with the situation immediately. If you leave things for too long, it may be too late and you might not ever be able to fix everything between you. Whether your husband is lying to project your feelings or because he is too proud to admit his failures, it is important that he agrees to stop.
There are many reasons to explain why your husband keeps lying to you, but it is important that you have a conversation with him about it. He may be lying because he has made a mistake and is too proud to admit the truth, or he has done something to upset you and he is trying to protect your feelings from being hurt. No matter what, it is wrong.
A lying partner can change if he wants your marriage to succeed. Let your partner know that you will not be able to remain in your relationship unless he is able to change his ways. If he promises to change and does stay by his commitment, it is a positive sign that he will be able to change and remain truthful in the future.
To Sum Up…
When your partner lies to you, it can be one of the most heartbreaking moments in a relationship. If you have always had a completely honest and open bond in the past, it can be especially difficult to swallow. However, if you make sure to deal with the situation immediately, there are ways that your partner can change and stop lying.
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As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.