How Do Men React To Unplanned Pregnancy? (11 Ways To Expect Him To React)

What was going through your mind after taking the pregnancy test only to discover it came back positive? What kind of reaction would you expect a single man (who has no plans of becoming a father anytime soon) to give to such pregnancy news? What are the first words you expect from a man who isn’t ready to take any serious responsibility yet?

Even if you were to be the love of his life and he hopes to make both of you husband and wife someday soon, the unplanned pregnancy will still surprise him, and you can’t be too sure of what his reaction would be. 

How Will He React To An Unplanned Pregnancy

If your relationship has been going on for long and he loves you, your man will still display mixed reactions because he wants to have a kid with you, just not at that time or under such circumstances. 

The reaction you should expect from your man will depend on many things including the level of your relationship and if he wants to be a father. What your man shouldn’t be is insensitive or completely callous in his choice of words or final decision. 

The moment his actions suggest that your child is unwelcome, you should get ready to exit his life, even though it’s hard for birth mothers to decide to become single parents.

However, before you jump the gun and conclude that your man would freak out at the pregnancy news, here are some possible reactions to expect from him and why he would act that way.

1. Expect shock

One reaction you should expect from your man when you tell him you’re pregnant is shock. Regardless of whether he will express joy or displeasure at the news later, he will still be shocked to hear that both of you are expecting a baby. An unplanned pregnancy is a surprise to a couple, married or not.

Children require planning and thoughtfulness, thus, a couple should have adequate time to plan to become parents and a family. The fact is, you as a woman and mother-to-be would have different emotions going through you at the thought of the unexpected new life growing inside you. 

The thought of abortion might even cross your mind if your present circumstances do not permit the inclusion of a baby. As such, you should be prepared and understand why he will express surprise at the news of your unplanned pregnancy. 

2. He will show concern

Despite his surprise or trepidation over the news of an unplanned pregnancy, your man would express concern for your physical and mental health. If he cares deeply about you, he would understand that the news of a baby is just as disturbing to you just as it is scary for him.

He might ask questions like: how are you feeling? Are you feeling nauseous? Does your tummy hurt? Are your feet swollen? Does your backache? These nervous questions are normal for a man who just discovered he will be a father soon.

Although you might be doing perfectly fine and think his questions are ridiculous while there are more important things to discuss, it’s okay to indulge his fear for a few minutes. Afterward, you may move on to the serious conversation of becoming parents.

3. He will be curious about what decision you will make

Being an unplanned pregnancy, in your head the situation falls under the emergency category which requires immediate attention. However, the reality is that a baby will take his or her time to get here; nine months to be precise.

As such, even though emotions are currently ruling the decisions either of you makes, you’ll still need to make a rational choice. Unplanned or not, there is a baby on the way and the ultimate decision falls on you. If your man is the real deal, he will be supportive yet curious about what you want to do with the unplanned pregnancy.

He would most likely ask tough questions like, “Do you want to keep the baby or give it away?” if he is crazily in love with you and the idea of having a child, he might tell you, “Hey, I know it’s your body but I don’t want you going for an abortion because I want this kid and you.”

4. He might be angry

Unplanned pregnancies can test the strength of relationships, especially ones that have become shaky in the first place. If your man hasn’t given any thought to a future including pregnancy or you bearing his children, he might get angry.

One of the reasons he might get angry could be because he thinks you made the pregnancy happen on purpose. He could also be angry with himself out of the fear of not protecting both of you adequately. 

Whatever the case may be, pinpoint the emotions fueling his anger to know if you’re still a part of his life or if the unplanned pregnancy is a deal-breaker for your relationship. 

5. He might deny the child

he might deny the child

A man who expresses outrage at the news of an unplanned pregnancy he helped to make might end up denying the paternity of the baby. As hard as this might seem for you to accept, starting a family with such a person will not be the wisest thing to do.

If you remain his girlfriend, hoping he will come around to accept the unplanned pregnancy as his, you might be waiting a long time and waste the precious time you should spend on securing a good life for yourself and your child.

6. He will express joy

One of the feelings you should expect from men regarding an unplanned pregnancy is absolute joy. The feelings of joy and excitement at the prospect of becoming a father might not be the first set of reactions men express at the news of an unplanned pregnancy. 

However, it will be the eventual reactions they show after they think about the situation, especially if they love the woman in question. Men who sound or appear happy at the news of unplanned pregnancy would most likely spin their woman around in happiness or do a cartwheel before they start to treat her like an egg.

7. He will want to know what he can do to help

An unplanned pregnancy is unexpected but it can also be one of the ways to bond better with your man. The unplanned pregnancy might also force both of you to take your relationship to the next phase, which is taking more responsibility for each other and the new life you have to cater for. 

A child in the mix of your love life means shifting priority and committing to the stress that comes with being responsible for a little human. It is also human for you and your man to entertain fear at the thought of raising a child, especially if it’s your first one. 

As such, your man will want all the help you can give him to understand what you need. Therefore, he will be full of inquiries on how to be of help during such a time.

8. He will check out if your body has started changing

A man delighted at the news of you getting pregnant, although unplanned, will immediately start marveling at the wonder your body is going to do. He might start checking out your breast for any sign of increase, your waist for a wider girth, and your stomach for more roundness.

The wonder in his eyes would make you feel relieved and like the most cherished woman in the world.

9. He will try to assure you

The issue of an unplanned pregnancy can go two ways: your man might be the elated one while you are the scared one. If this is the case, your partner will be the one reassuring you that everything will be fine and you will be a wonderful mother.

Starting a family can be scary but when you have a partner who is ready to go through each process with you, your worry should be minimal.

10. He will be supportive

he will be supportive

After the shock of the news of unplanned pregnancy has waned, you should expect two reactions from men; support or rejection. Reluctance might be a third reaction but either of the other would be more prominent. 

If your partner would be supportive, he will let you know through his words and deeds. He will begin to seek that will make you comfortable and happy even though neither of you was expecting the pregnancy. 

11. He might leave you

The worst-case scenario that could happen after the news that you are unexpectedly pregnant is for your partner to leave you and you’ll become a single parent. 

The current state of your partnership might be an indicator of why this would happen but people change too and so, his feelings or reaction might not be rational either. Even if he promises to give child support or agree to shared custody, the truth remains, he doesn’t want to start a family with you. 


Do unplanned pregnancies ruin relationships?

If the couple involved aren’t on good terms or if the partnership was already sinking, an unexpected pregnancy can ruin things. 

Can a man feel if he has impregnated a woman?

One way a man can suspect his woman is pregnant is if he can calculate her menstrual cycle.

Can a man be attracted to a pregnant woman?

Yes, some men are attracted to pregnant women, especially if they’re in love with the idea of a family.

What are signs you're having a boy?

There are no obvious signs, symptoms, or feelings that will let you know the sex of your baby until you’re ready to know the medical way. Ultrasound and free cell DNA blood tests are two options that will let you know the sex of your child. 

How are fathers affected by pregnancy?

Some myths claim a father also feels the pain of his pregnant partner, but what people mean most times is the exhaustion he feels during the period of pregnancy.

In Summary 

A man's reaction to unplanned pregnancies can vary from joy to disbelief, to fury or acceptance. Based on the status of your relationship with your partner, you will be prepared for the actions he exhibits after the serious conversation.

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