How Can I See Who Is Texting My Boyfriend? (5 Sneaky Ways to Find Out)

Every happy relationship is far from perfect because there will be challenges couples need to overcome together. However, a time comes in any relationship whereby you need to tell yourself the truth. 

You’ll have to ask yourself, are the constant doubt and insecurity worth sticking with the man? Would I be better off knowing my boyfriend is cheating on me, or should I endure his secretive behavior a bit longer? Most times, it is always better to be aware of the truth so that you can move on if that’s the best thing for you. 

Even if your boyfriend’s behavior hasn’t given any clear indication that he isn’t faithful to you, you cannot ignore the times he hurriedly locked his cell phone the moment you entered the room. You cannot remain blind to the times he goes out of the house to take ‘a business call'. 

His betrayal would even hurt all the more if he had suggested that he wants to settle down with you after years of dating. As such, it is best if you clear your doubt and be free of the heavy burden on your mind. Read on to see 5 ways to see who your boyfriend is texting.

5 Ways To See Who Is Texting My Boyfriend

1. Firstly, ensure you know the outcome

While it is easy to run online and check for helpful articles such as this one, you need to consider if snooping on your boyfriend’s phone is the best thing for you. At the end of the day, you’ll need to live with the backlash of your decision if you’re wrong. It is quite possible that when you check your boyfriend’s text messages, you’ll find shreds of evidence of his unfaithfulness. 

The question is, can you deal with whatever you find out? Also, ask yourself, are you overreacting and it just happens that you always catch him at the wrong time? Could you be seeing things because you’re battling with general stress? It would be devastating to realize after you check your boyfriend’s phone that he isn’t cheating on you.

Also, if you’re going through a rough patch, it might not be the best time to catch your man in a lie. You need to be clear-headed and logical to handle the tools or techniques for monitoring your boyfriend’s text messages. If you aren’t sure you’re physically and mentally strong to go through with it, you might want to consider other options.

2. Ask to use his phone

ask to use his phone

After deciding to go through with spying on your boyfriend’s messages, the next thing is to get your hands on his mobile phone. There are different ways to check his text messages without his knowledge, but most of them are risky. 

It is better to minimize the risks involved in the process and go for safer options. One of the simpler options you should consider is asking to use his cell phone. You’re in a relationship with the man, and he must trust you to a large extent. As such, it shouldn’t be hard to get him to hand over his phone. 

The first trick in using your boyfriend’s phone to spy on him is that you’ll need to be fast about your snooping. It will have to be a get in and out quick thing, else, he would suspect you. Secondly, don’t show your nervousness. You need to act like you normally would if you’re using his phone on a regular day.

Thirdly, ensure you’re partially facing away from him without raising his suspicions. If both of you are sitting on the couch together, sit on the opposite end and place your legs on his lap. By taking this position before requesting his phone, he won’t suspect you immediately because you’d be seated as you were before.

There is no guarantee that you will get much out of one spying session, but you’ll be able to check his call logs, some text messages, deleted messages (if there is a backup or recycle bin activated), and other data that will give him away before you have to return his phone. You should also consider that he might catch you while at it.

3. Link his phone with yours

One of the less secure methods of seeing who your boyfriend is texting is to link your messaging app to his own. There are inbuilt features that enable you to link features across mobile devices. Some allow you to sync and retrieve your data across your mobile and desktop devices, as long as you have sufficient storage and data connection. 

Apple’s iPhone has some such features. With an Apple iPhone, you can check your boyfriend’s text messages without his knowledge.

With this method, you don’t need to download a third-party app. All you need to do is get his phone once and follow the necessary steps. Firstly, go to ‘Settings' on his phone, then click on ‘Messages'. Secondly, click on the ‘Send and Receive Messages' option, then tap the ‘Add an Email’ command. There, you will input your Email ID.

Once your Email ID has been added to his message center all text messages he receives and sends will be delivered to the email address you linked with his phone.

Although this method is easy and convenient, the downside is that your boyfriend might still end up seeing your Email ID if he stumbles on his message settings.

4. Use spy software

use spy software

The most effective way of snooping through your partner’s phone is to use spy software. Although it is a huge invasion of his privacy, it is the fastest way to get the information you seek. Moreover, the other methods are no less invasive, you might as well go big or go home.

Also, don’t just go for any software or spy app. Ensure it is a verified one with enough genuine reviews online. Again, be sure using a spy app is something you want to do, especially if you don’t end up with the desirable result. You might have regrets after all, just be sure you can handle the aftermath of your snooping.

Examples of spy software you can download or use on the web include Minspy and mSpy for iOS and Android. These apps are more effective and secure because you do not need to access your partner’s phone before you can start spying. 

Xnspy is another example of a dedicated monitoring app that helps you read text messages without access to the target phone. It effectively harnesses all existing and incoming data from a phone and presents it on a dashboard for you to view. It has robust message monitoring capabilities with its headlining feature providing remote access to texting apps and iMessage chats.

The app can eavesdrop on Google Messages, built-in SMS clients on Android and even iMessage on iOS devices. And that too remotely! Couple these features with its solid all round monitoring suite and you’ve got a great option to check your boyfriend’s text history.

With remote and stealth monitoring on your side, you won’t need to be shaking inside while maintaining a calm look on the outside while you’re checking his text messages in front of him. With these apps, you can check your boyfriend’s location, and browsing history, monitor instant messaging apps, check deleted texts, and his social media conversations.

Also, data privacy is guaranteed as much as possible, and no technical background is required to operate the software. These apps are not free because of the security features that come with them. While some other apps that check a boyfriend’s text messages are free, they are not fully effective. Again, ensure you use this method only if other approaches fail.

5. Ask him directly

The most direct way to know if your boyfriend is faithful to you or not is to ask him straight up. You might be scared that he will lie to you and tell you only what you want to hear. While your fear is valid, this option could be the most freeing one. It will guarantee you peace of mind, spare your time and ensure you have no guilt at the end of the day.

His answer will go in different directions; he will allow you to check his phone and you won’t find anything incriminating, or he will tell you he’s faithful and you can believe him or not. Either way, his body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions will give you an idea of whether he’s telling the truth or not. With time, you’ll know if he gave you the right answer. 


Can I find out who my boyfriend is texting?

Yes, you can find out who your boyfriend is chatting with through different techniques such as checking his phone directly or using a spy app. 

How can I see my boyfriend’s text messages, for free, without him knowing?

You can use the iPhone feature that allows you to link your Email ID to his own, or use free spy tools.

How do you know if your partner is texting someone else?

He will either leave the room or turn away from you so you don’t see who he is chatting with.

Can I spy on my boyfriend's phone?

Yes, you can. Get a spy tool that offers different features for spying on someone else’s text messages and social media messages. 

Should I check my boyfriend's phone?

If you think asking him direct questions will not get you the real answers, you may snoop through his phone to see his text messages. However, this option can backfire, so consider your choices properly.

To Summarize 

Trust in every relationship is as vital as it is breakable. Once trust becomes shaky, you can start seeing things that are not there. Before you use a spy tool or technique, try confronting your boyfriend for the answers you need. That way, you won’t need to spend your life for the bitter outcome that lies at the end of a spying endeavor. 

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