Are you one of the people who feel sex doesn’t have much value until emotions become a part of the equation? If yes, you may not bat an eyelid in a situation whereby a guy stops texting you after you slept together.
On the other hand, if you’re the kind of woman who cannot separate sex and love from each other, it would disturb you greatly if the guy you like had sex with you and ended all forms of communication all of a sudden.
Before the dating process included sex, he was charming, available, and the best potential boyfriend ever. However, the moment he got the cookie, you stopped seeing him and he wouldn’t return your texts either.
It is a normal thing to feel foolish for thinking so highly of him but, it’s not okay for you to continue to feel bad about the situation.
At the same time, you want to find some sort of closure for the way things ended and this might lead you to begin pondering how much of the fault was yours. Read on because this article will give you reasons why he stopped texting after both of you had sex. Hopefully, you’ll get the closure you seek.
- 1 23 Possible Reasons Why
- 1.1 1. He Only Wanted To Have Sex With You
- 1.2 2. He Thinks He Messed Up
- 1.3 3. He Is A One-Night-Stand Kind Of Guy
- 1.4 4. He Is In A Committed Relationship With Another Woman
- 1.5 5. He Is A Serial Sex Addict Who Needed To Scratch An Itch
- 1.6 6. He Is Just A Horrible Person
- 1.7 7. You Always Pick The Same Type Of Guy
- 1.8 8. His Phone Stopped Working
- 1.9 9. Something Bad Happened To Him
- 1.10 10. He Moved Away To Somewhere Very Far
- 1.11 11. He Got Into Trouble With The Government
- 1.12 12. He Thought The Age Difference Between Both Of You Would Matter
- 1.13 13. You Weren’t The Type Of Sex Partner He Likes
- 1.14 14. He Assumed You Understood It Was Just Sex Between Both Of You
- 1.15 15. You Never Had A Real Conversation With Him Before You Slept With Him
- 1.16 16. You Weren’t Interested In The Kind Of Fetish He Liked
- 1.17 17. He Didn’t Like Your Sexual Peculiarities
- 1.18 18. He Assumed Ignoring You Translated To Him Going Easy On You
- 1.19 19. He Found Your Physical Attributes Somewhat Lacking
- 1.20 20. He Is Busy
- 1.21 21. You Were His Rebound Sex Mate
- 1.22 22. He Has Done This To You Multiple Times
- 1.23 23. He Feels Guilty
- 2 FAQs
- 3 In Conclusion
23 Possible Reasons Why
1. He Only Wanted To Have Sex With You
If there was an award for the most obvious reason a guy stops communicating after sleeping with a girl, this reason would take the prize home. People don’t need a special reason to have sex, they can do so just because they feel like it.
If you didn’t understand why the guy took an interest in you, when he stops texting, it’ll be plain to see that he only wanted to have sex with you.
2. He Thinks He Messed Up
Men can be touchy about their performance during sex and if a man believes he failed at making his sexual partner have a mindblowing time in bed, his ego will be bruised.
Also, he might want to shut down communication with the woman to avoid embarrassment, even if you don’t say anything about the experience. It’s not your fault he’s insecure, so if he doesn’t reach out, you may have to forget him.
3. He Is A One-Night-Stand Kind Of Guy
This is another common reason why a guy may stop texting or calling you after sex. A one-night stand guy is not looking for a relationship, he’s just in for the fun for the night.
Such a guy can pick up any girl from the bar, sweet-talk her and take her home for the night. You’ll most likely meet such guys on chat apps. As soon as they have their one-night fun, they disappear, that’s their life.
4. He Is In A Committed Relationship With Another Woman
He may not be who you thought he was – a single man ready for a relationship with you. He might be in a committed relationship with another woman he intends to marry.
If you’ve known him long enough to find out the truth, do so and close that chapter of your life. It will hurt to find out you were a temporary distraction but it’s better to know the truth now and move on.
5. He Is A Serial Sex Addict Who Needed To Scratch An Itch
While this reason may look similar to the one-night stand guy, this particular reason is far worse because even if such a guy ends up sticking with you, he will cheat on you endlessly.
He is the proverbial ‘disease on sticks’ or the kind of guy who ‘chases after everything in skirts’. One thing is clear, you’re better off without him and it's good he stopped messaging you.
6. He Is Just A Horrible Person
You could be the completely innocent party in this situation because you were transparent with this guy but, he chose to be a horrible person immediately after he got what he wanted.
While we feel we now live in a world where casual sex is normalized, a lot of guys don’t see it that way. So they play this horrible game of leading ladies on, sleeping with them, and going MIA.
7. You Always Pick The Same Type Of Guy
No one wants to realize that sometimes, they are responsible for their misfortunes in their life. But that’s exactly what happens to many people. The fact that you keep going out with the same set of unserious guys doesn’t make you a loser, we all pick them wrong sometimes.
You just need to be more observant about a guy’s traits before having sex with him to stop the emotional abuse cycle. With this, you’ll be able to sift through the good, bad, and ugly ones and make better choices.
8. His Phone Stopped Working
The answer to why he stopped sending you messages could be because his phone developed a fault or got missing and he had to switch lines.
After putting a phone call through to him or texting him for weeks and he remains unreachable, it is okay to assume the phone stopped working. You might run into him later and know why he didn’t try to contact you.
9. Something Bad Happened To Him
It is not every time someone stops talking to you that you’ll assume they are ghosting you on purpose. Sometimes, it’s best to give them the benefit of doubt. Have you ever thought that something bad happened to that guy you slept with, and it wasn’t that he stayed away from you intentionally?
The case might be even worse and the guy was in an accident. You can do all you can to find out what happened before you accept he’s ghosting you.
10. He Moved Away To Somewhere Very Far
If the guy you had sex with moved away to another state, you can expect that he will stop reaching out until he’s settled. However, if he moved away without doing the right thing by you, he wasn’t worth your time in the first instance.
The right thing for him to have done would have been to inform you that he couldn’t keep a long-distance relationship and had to end things amicably with you.
11. He Got Into Trouble With The Government
One other reason he stopped texting after you slept together was that he got in trouble with the government and had to go to jail. This reason may seem far-fetched but hey, this is life and anything can happen.
Be it tax evasion issues, or whatever kind of crime he got mixed up with, you’re better off without getting caught in it.
12. He Thought The Age Difference Between Both Of You Would Matter
You could be the older one and instead of telling you how he felt when he found out, he freaked out and stopped all communications with you.
Dating or having sex with an older woman is still an awkward thing for some guys because they think there’s no maturity similarity. To avoid such occurrences, it is good to know who you’re sleeping with beforehand.
13. You Weren’t The Type Of Sex Partner He Likes
Until you find the kind of man who will care about you beyond sex, you may fall for guys who have a ‘type’. While it’s not a bad thing to have a preference, expecting each person you date to meet your standards from the first sexual encounter is unrealistic.
If the guy is one of those who expects ultimate sexual satisfaction the first time, he won’t call or text you afterward.
14. He Assumed You Understood It Was Just Sex Between Both Of You
If the guy was under the impression that you started dating him because of the sexual attraction between you two, he won’t see anything wrong with reducing interactions or putting a total stop to it after sleeping together.
15. You Never Had A Real Conversation With Him Before You Slept With Him
Most of the reasons why a guy may stop texting or talking to you after you slept together boils down to a lack of specific direction for the relationship.
If you had a proper conversation about what you both expect from the relationship, there won’t be any misconceptions if things don’t work out in the end. As such, if you discussed having just sex, even if you’re hurt, you won’t be surprised when he stays away or stops reaching out.
16. You Weren’t Interested In The Kind Of Fetish He Liked
Some men are so particular about sex and getting the kind of woman who will fit into their sexual fantasy world. You may find it hard to believe but a guy can end a relationship with you if you don’t satisfy those sexual fantasies.
17. He Didn’t Like Your Sexual Peculiarities
The same way a guy can break up with you because you weren’t inclined towards his sexual fetishes, he can stop things with you because he doesn’t like your sexual peculiarities.
If you are the type to cry after sex and he finds that awkward, it may be a deal-breaker for him. He should have told you he found your after-sex reaction weird instead of taking the easy way out and bailing.
18. He Assumed Ignoring You Translated To Him Going Easy On You
So you slept together and he wasn’t too thrilled with the experience, he should have just told you so. However, instead of boldly telling you he is no longer interested, he simply ignored you. Such a guy will give up on you countless times even if you continue dating him.
19. He Found Your Physical Attributes Somewhat Lacking
If you met each other online and hadn’t had the chance to see what the other person looked like, there’s a possibility that one person will be disappointed with the other’s physical outlook. This is not enough reason for him to just shut you out but, he probably thought it was a good thing not to say it to your face and risk-reducing your self-confidence.
20. He Is Busy
Contrary to your belief that he stopped texting you because you were not good enough, he’s likely been caught up in his busy schedule and unable to initiate a conversation with you or respond to your texts. He’ll get around to talking to you eventually.
21. You Were His Rebound Sex Mate
If he stopped texting you after you slept together, he probably used you for rebound sex after he went through a bad break-up. If you knew about his recent relationship, it would have been best if you didn’t sleep with him at all.
However, there’s no point hanging on for a response from him. He is probably back together with his ex now.
22. He Has Done This To You Multiple Times
If you’ve been dating him for a while and he’s ghosted you a couple of times, you shouldn’t be all that surprised he’s doing it again. The best course of action would probably be to make sure there’s no next time for him to mess with you again.
23. He Feels Guilty
A guy could feel embarrassed or guilty about sleeping with you, especially if it wasn’t really a conscious decision. Did you guys have a lot to drink? Then it’s obvious both of you were under the influence before and during sex.
Let’s look at different scenarios here; he’s close to you but not romantically interested. He actually likes your best friend and feels he has ruined his chances with her. He made a life-decision to be celibate because casual sex has gotten him in trouble before. Any of these or more could be the reason he’s feeling guilty and shutting you out.
If you kept waiting for his texts after you slept with him but they didn't come, he’s probably waiting for you to text him first. You can wait a while and text him to see if he’ll return your message.
He changed towards you because he didn’t like you as a person but for your body or his urges only. He was probably pretending to be part of your life just to get in your pants.
If a guy likes, respects, and enjoys spending time with you, he will text you the next morning or as soon as he can. If he doesn’t like you all that much, he might take a longer time to contact you.
If a guy doesn’t fancy you, he might never text you again. Also, he could ignore you because he has other commitments he considers more important at the moment.
You can stop obsessing over a guy you slept with by outlining his downsides and why it could never work with him. If he’s proven to be especially difficult, you can try dating someone else to get over him.
Rather than dwell on how you messed up your chances with a guy you slept with, you can focus on why he stopped texting you. You may not be at fault at all and even if you are, knowing the reason why can help you overcome your doubts.
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As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.