Are you dating someone and you don’t feel like he makes you one of his priorities and you feel like you are the one that is making all of the efforts in your relationship? Have you been married to someone for a while and now you are starting to feel like you are no longer on his list of priorities? You are likely wondering what you should do in this situation.
Perhaps you want to spend more time with him but your relationship feels different to before, your partner seems to put everything else before spending time with you. You no longer feel like you are an important part of his life and you don’t feel appreciated by him anymore. How do you make a change in this situation and what can you do?
If you are no longer someone’s priority it can be the most horrible feeling. You may end up in an unhealthy cycle of trying to show him that you should be one of his priorities and that he should make more time for you in his life. Perhaps you have had enough of this feeling of not being good enough for him and you are wondering how you can change this situation.
- 1 What Should You Do?
- 1.1 1. Understand Your Partner’s Thinking
- 1.2 2. Remember That He Doesn’t Think In The Same Way As You
- 1.3 3. Make Sure To Keep Your Other Options Open
- 1.4 4. Don’t Obsess Over Becoming His Priority
- 1.5 5. Focus On Yourself And Who You Were Before
- 1.6 6. Be Confident
- 1.7 7. Stop Comparing Your Situation And Forget About The Idea Of What It Should Be Like
- 1.8 8. Figure Out Why You Feel As If You Need To Be His Priority All Of The Time
- 2 FAQs
- 3 On A Final Note…
What Should You Do?
Being someone’s priority is a lovely feeling, however, this does not mean that you have to be the sole important thing in his life, this just isn’t realistic or healthy in any relationship. You cannot expect him to forget everything else in his life for you and to focus purely on you and not anybody else, this won’t happen in any relationship so don’t expect or hope for it.
If this happened anyway and he focused on you all of his time, you would probably find it overbearing and get sick of it soon enough anyway. You were attracted to him because of his full and busy life and all of his passions and interests. It is not interesting to be in a relationship when all you focus on is each other and nothing else.
It is important to consider what you really want and whether the things that you are hoping for in your relationship are actually realistic. If you really feel like he puts everything else ahead of you and he ignores you a lot of the time then you do have an issue but make sure that you are not overthinking or exaggerating before you accuse him of anything.
Keep reading to find out what you should do if he doesn’t make you one of his priorities or he doesn’t seem to spend enough time with you anymore.
1. Understand Your Partner’s Thinking
Guys don’t always think in the same way that women do, many can be very goal-focused and find it difficult to multitask as women can. When a man is at work, it is likely that his sole focus is the work that he is doing and he will not be thinking about anything else apart from that at that given moment. This may explain why he forgets to reply to the texts that you sent him!
Remember that if you send your guy a text at work you may not receive a reply straight away. Try to keep yourself busy with things instead rather than spending all of your time texting him and waiting for a reply. It does not mean that he loves you any less if he doesn’t text you all day when he is at work. So perhaps send him fewer texts when he’s working.
You may be wondering if he used to text you all of the time at the beginning of your relationship, why has he stopped texting you as often now? Well, it is probably the case that at the start he was trying to win your affection, but now your relationship is more stable, he no longer sees the need to text you all day every day.
2. Remember That He Doesn’t Think In The Same Way As You
It is important to remember in a relationship that your partner may not think in exactly the same way as you do and there is nothing wrong with this either. Be aware of what he feels comfortable in your relationship too rather than just thinking of what you want. Perhaps you want to spend all day texting him but he needs time to focus on work and on his hobbies.
It is important that if he doesn’t act in exactly the way that you want or hopes in your relationship that you don’t turn it into a huge argument. There is nothing wrong with asking your partner for space and alone time in your relationship so make sure that you don’t guilt him into acting otherwise just because it is what you want him to be like.
Make sure that you are mature and secure enough in your relationship with your partner so that you respect his desires and needs in your relationship. Your man will be a lot happier and likely more affectionate and loving toward you if you are able to be mature enough to accept his needs and desires in your relationship too.
3. Make Sure To Keep Your Other Options Open
If you are not yet in a committed or long term relationship with your partner and you have only been seeing them for a short amount of time, it is important to remember that you have other options and that you should keep these options open. Make sure that you don’t commit to him too early when he isn’t making you a priority in his life.
If he isn’t treating you as his girlfriend then remember that you don’t have to commit to him just yet either. Pretending that he is making you his priority when he isn’t is not going to help you win him over. It is important to focus on developing your emotional connection on a deep level with this guy so that you begin to form a real and lasting relationship with each other.
When you can form a real and genuine connection with someone they are much more likely to treat you like a priority and want to spend much more time with you. Work on developing a connection that goes beyond the surface level if you want to become an important part of his life. He will begin to open up to you about his innermost self and his deepest desires.
4. Don’t Obsess Over Becoming His Priority
If you are dating someone and you deeply want to be his priority, obsessing over it is not going to win him over and will likely only make your situation worse. Worrying and obsessing about whether he sees you as one of his priorities or about how much he likes you is not going to make him commit to you. Remember to be yourself around him instead.
It is important in dating to forget about worrying about what may happen and instead use this time to discover who this person is and whether you are really compatible with each other. If you see a connection with this person, use this time to develop a deep emotional connection with each other. Be happy and have fun together and he will be much more likely to commit to you.
It is also vital to remember to focus on all the other things that are going on in your life other than him. He is much more likely to be attracted to you if he sees how interesting your life is outside of him. Forget about obsessing over getting him to make you his priority and it will be a lot more likely to actually happen than if you are worried about it all of the time.
5. Focus On Yourself And Who You Were Before
If you are in a relationship where you don’t feel you are your partner’s priority anymore or you feel as if you never were then it is important to focus on yourself and remember who you were before this relationship started. Stop waiting around and obsessing over him making you a priority and focus on being your own priority instead.
If you spend all of your time obsessing and worrying about it, it is never going to happen. Make your life full of interesting and fun things. He will want to be a part of it and will start fighting for your attention. Try and do everything that you can to get back to being the person you were before you met him and started a relationship with him.
He was attracted to you because of your full and balanced life. He loved to hear about all of your hobbies and interests and everything that you used to be passionate about. When all of these things have fallen by the wayside because all of your focus is on him, his attraction may be weakening because of this, in turn ensuring you aren’t his priority anymore.
6. Be Confident
Men are a lot more attracted to women that are happy and confident in themselves rather than those who spend all of their time obsessing over what their partner is thinking about or doing. Make it your priority to be the best and most confident version of yourself and he will be more likely to want to spend all of his time with you and make you an important part of his life again.
Obsessing over things is not going to get you anywhere, it is a negative and unhealthy way to live and this is likely to start rubbing off on him too. Focus on enjoying your life and being confident in yourself and he will want to be a part of it with you. However, if you have been doing your best to act in this way and be confident and he still hasn’t changed then think carefully.
There may be something else going on in your relationship that is causing him to act differently toward you. Communicate with him in an open and honest discussion and try and find out what is going on and whether you can find a solution together. If you seem to be unable to work things out it may be time to move on from this guy if he isn’t making you happy anymore.
7. Stop Comparing Your Situation And Forget About The Idea Of What It Should Be Like
Many people have an expectation about what a romantic situation should look like. They compare their own to that of the people around them, which often ends in unhappiness and can usually spell the end of the partnership if it carries on too long unresolved. While on social media things may appear differently remember that this is real life.
You are never going to be your partner’s only and sole priority. He has a lot of other people in his life that are also his priority. You cannot expect him to drop all of his other relationships and passions just so that he can spend all of his time with you. This is not a healthy nor a realistic expectation, so ensure that you stop hoping for this to happen, as it likely never will.
Remember all of the other priorities that he has such as work, his family, his friends, and his hobbies and passions. Avoid comparing your situation to social media and what other people’s relationships appear to be like on there. They are likely much different in reality and behind closed doors, so it is not healthy to constantly be comparing yours.
8. Figure Out Why You Feel As If You Need To Be His Priority All Of The Time
If you are worried that you are not his priority even though you do spend a lot of time together and you can admit that he shows you a lot of love and affection, there may be something else going on. Other personal issues may be causing you to feel insecure with your partner. Perhaps you feel as if you are unable to completely trust him so you want to spend all of your time with him.
If this is the case it is important to identify what these issues are and find a way to solve them, as it may not even be your partner that is the problem. Think deeply about what your fears and emotions are in relation to this and try and figure out what is causing them. If your partner has been unfaithful before you may be realizing that you can never trust him again.
What Turns A Man Off During Dating?
Men like women that are confident and happy in themselves, if you are constantly obsessing over whether you are his priority or how to make yourself one of his priorities then he is likely going to pick up on this negative energy and push away from you. Focus on enjoying your life and being the best version of yourself and you will see things changing in your relationship.
What Is The Biggest Turn Off For A Man?
Men don’t enjoy it when women are too needy and clingy in a relationship. It is important to find a balance in your relationship that you are both comfortable with. If you want to spend all your time in close physical contact with your man but he isn’t happy with this kind of affection then it is important to communicate and find a solution together so that you can move forward.
How Do You Tell If A Guy Is Turned On?
If you want to know whether a guy is attracted to you or not, then notice whether he treated you like a priority. If he always ensures to make time with you and puts you on his priority list no matter how busy he is, then you are one of the most important things in his life. He will be attracted by your confidence, positivity, and happiness, so radiate this energy.
What Are Some Turn Offs?
Men usually aren’t attracted to a woman that wants to spend all of their time with them and refuse to see other people in order to make time for you. It is important in any partnership to find a balance between being each other’s priority in a relationship and still making sure to see other people and do all of the other things that you love too.
What Turns A Man On During Kissing?
Most men love when you are focused solely on them, spend time with him and make a little romantic date for your man. Get a bottle of wine and set up a bubble bath with essential oils and your man will feel extremely loved and even more attracted to you. No matter how busy you are make sure that you spend time with each other and ensure that each other is a priority.
On A Final Note…
Whether you have been married to someone for a while or you have been dating for just a few weeks it can be hard when your spouse doesn’t put you first or ensure that you are one of his priority. He seems to put all the other people in his life ahead of you. Try and find a solution to this by focusing on yourself and avoiding obsessing over the situation at hand.
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As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.