Criticism In Relationships (7 Simple Ways Deal With Them)

Criticism can ruin many relationships and is so damaging that it is one of the main reasons that cause relationships to break up or end in divorce. No one expects you to just accept those annoying habits that your partner may have but when you criticize him more than you compliment him, it may end up causing the demise of your relationship. 

Nobody is perfect and, in any relationship, it is necessary to accept a person’s flaws as well as their good qualities but you are likely to complain about something every now and again. However, when it gets to a point when you are criticizing that person all of the time, every day it may cause the end of your relationship. 

It is also important to remember how you should communicate your irritation with your partner as this is the most important thing in saving your relationship. If you are able to communicate the things that annoy you in a mature and sympathetic way, your partner is much more likely to respond in kind. 

Criticism In Relationships

It is important to remember that criticism involves a complaint when it is expressed as if it is a personality flaw. You may say to your partner that he never washed the dishes and that makes him a bad person rather than just asking him to help you to wash the dishes later on instead. It is a lot easier to avoid arguments if you say things in a certain way. 

It is often the case that people turn to criticism rather than telling their partner how they really feel. Many often use criticism as a means of self-preservation and attack or blame their partner rather than vulnerably opening up to them and telling them what they really need them to do. It is a lot easier to criticize someone than to open up to them about what is really going on. 

Criticism is an easy thing to resort to especially if you are not in a very happy relationship, however it is one of the most destructive things that can happen in a relationship. There are a lot more healthy ways to deal with issues in a relationship than to criticize someone. Keep reading to find out how to avoid or deal with criticism in relationships. 

1. Communicate constructively instead

communicate constructively instead

It is important to be aware of the difference between complaining to and criticizing someone. If you want to know whether you are communicating something that is bothering you in your relationship constructively or you are merely criticizing your loved one, notice how you form the language that you use. 

If you give your partner constructive and healthy feedback regarding his actions and behavior rather than insulting his behavior and personality, you will into a lot fewer issues in your relationship. It is possible to tell your partner how you feel or think without criticizing him personally. Try to avoid using nasty words or attacking your partner’s personality. 

If you use harsh insults or you attack your partner directly, it is likely criticism. If your comments include swearing or harsh words it likely decreases the effectiveness of your message and makes mentioning it pointless. He will likely ignore this type of criticism because of the tone that you gave him the message. 

2. How to avoid letting criticism damage your relationship

It is not always easy to avoid criticizing your partner, as everybody will do some things that annoy you. It is impossible to be in a relationship with someone and never get annoyed by small things that they may do or say. However, it is important to remember that these little things don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things and they are not worth ruining your partnership over. 

If you notice that you always criticize your partner, especially in arguments it is time to think about how you can change this behavior and communicate constructively with him instead. It can be a very hard habit to break and it will take time, but remember that it will be worth it if it saves your partnership and transforms it into a much healthier one than it was before. 

It is important to be aware of how this repeated criticism affects your partner and his self-confidence. This may help you to make the change and finally break the habit that you have been struggling with. Try to focus on the good aspects of his personality and those that made you fall in love with him in the first place rather than just focusing on the bad. 

3. Protect his self-confidence

protect his self-confidence

By working on avoiding constantly criticizing your partner you will be protecting his self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-worth. If your partner is always receiving criticism from you he will likely be extremely low in confidence as this type of insult penetrates deeply. Criticism, when it is constantly repeated, can damage and even ruin a person’s confidence in themselves. 

If you always criticize the way that he does things, how he talks, or the way that he dresses he may begin to doubt his ability to do anything right in your eyes. He may be questioning his value and worth. This is especially true if it is coming from someone who is supposed to love and support him. 

He may think that because you love and care about him, what you are saying to him is true. If he starts to believe all of your insults and criticism he will likely begin to lose all confidence in himself. It is important to remember how your repeated criticism may affect your spouse, these insults will likely not be taken lightly and can take a long time to recover from. 

4. Remember that it can ruin your bond

Constant criticism can ruin and destroy the bond and intimate connection that you once shared with your partner. Repeated criticism can damage the trust that you share with each other and feel like you have been betrayed by your loved one. When a person is in a partnership with a critical partner they can begin to feel more distant and less connected to that person. 

Criticism, when it is used constantly, can ruin the bond and the promises that your loved ones will always care and love you and will never hurt you on purpose. It can destroy intimacy if it goes on for a long time and makes you become emotionally distant from your partner. You may no longer feel close to each other in the way that you used to. 

The feelings of love and happiness that you once experienced whenever you were with your partner will begin to be replaced by feelings of hostility, sadness, and resentment. It is important to remember that constant criticism can begin to ruin the bond and connection that you share with your partner and you may never be able to recover it in the future. 

5. Be aware that it may make your partner feel inferior

be aware that it may make your partner feel inferior

If you are always criticizing your partner, it is important to be aware that after time he will begin to feel inferior to you. If criticism is expressed as a negative aspect of his character or personality rather than just part of his behavior, he will begin to take it on board and feel inferior to you. He may never be able to regain his self-confidence and may always feel like he is worth-less. 

Criticism often appears in the form of belittling your partner and suggesting that they are inferior to you. It is a suggestion that those people who criticize others constantly are better and superior to those that they criticize. If you are constantly telling your partner that he does things wrong he may begin to believe that this is true and think that you are superior to him. 

Being critical toward your partner can ruin his self-esteem. It is important to be aware of and try different communication styles if this is the case in your partnership. Focus on your own personal issues as criticism may manifest as a form of self-protection. It may also be necessary to speak to a couples therapist or to people that are relationship experts to resolve this issue. 

6. Try other means of communicating your issues

If you know that you are a critical partner and you don’t want this to be the case anymore it may be time to try other means of communicating your unhappiness as being a critical person is not always an effective means of causing a change in your partnership. If you criticize your partner you will likely trigger him to be defensive rather than getting him to change his behavior. 

Instead, try encouraging him and talking about your issues in a sympathetic way instead. If your partner becomes defensive, his guard will go up and he will likely ignore what you are trying to tell him anyway. It is also important that repeated criticism can also become a form of emotional abuse in relationships when it goes on for a long time. 

If you believe that you are emotionally abusing your partner or your partner is emotionally abusing you, it is time to seek help to either change the situation or get out of the partnership. It is important to remember that you shouldn’t stay in a partnership that you don’t feel safe, happy, or comfortable in, and don’t ignore the issues without looking for a solution. 

7. Focus on how you want him to behave instead

focus on how you want him to behave instead

Rather than constantly focusing on what you don’t want him to do, focus on what you do want him to do instead. Also, instead of criticizing your partner all of the time, compliment him for the things that he does right and the things that he does to make you happy. It is also important to remember to always be respectful and realistic of what your partner can offer you. 

You will be much more likely to get a positive response and affect positive change if you are kind and compassionate toward your partner rather than being destructive and insulting of him. Tell him what is worrying or stressing you out and tell him how he can help rather than getting annoyed at him for the way he has acted or the things that he hasn’t done. 

Sit down with your partner and communicate in a calm and mature way. Tell him exactly how his behavior is making you feel and how you would like him to behave in the future. Make sure that you give him time to explain his perspective and point of view too. Remember to stay calm, respective and realistic, and don’t ask him anything that you wouldn’t do yourself. 

FAQs

What is criticism in a relationship?

Criticism in a relationship can sometimes be a form of emotional abuse. While this is not always the case, criticism in relationships can be an extremely destructive and unhealthy thing. If you always criticize your partner for everything that he does, he may begin to think that he can never do anything right. He will lose any form of self-confidence or self-esteem. 

How do you respond to criticism in a relationship?

If your partner is always criticizing everything that you do in your partnership, it is important that you don’t ignore the situation and you try and look for a solution. Criticism can be extremely destructive and can ultimately cause the demise of your partnership if it goes on for too long. Communicate with your partner about how he is making you feel and look for a solution together. 

Should you criticize your partner?

While in all relationships there is always going to be something that your spouse does to annoy you, it does not mean that you should constantly criticize everything that your partner does. Criticism is one of the most destructive things in relationships. Rather, try focusing on what you want your partner to do instead rather than what he is doing wrong. 

What does constant criticism do to a person?

Constant criticism will make your partner feel inferior to you, he will begin to lose his self-confidence and self-esteem and will start to think that everything that he does is wrong. It is important to be aware of how your behavior will make him feel. It may eventually ruin your partnership so make sure to be careful. 

What are the signs of a toxic relationship?

Toxic relationships may involve repeated criticism. If your partner is criticizing everything that you do but he never compliments you or says anything nice, he may be emotionally abusing you. If you believe that you are in a toxic relationship it is important that you don’t avoid the situation and you look for a solution to get out of this situation by talking to people that you trust. 

To Sum Up…

Criticism can be one of the most destructive things in romantic relationships and it is one of the most common reasons for breakups and divorces. If you notice that you are always criticizing your spouse, it may be time to change your behavior, no matter how hard this may be. If you avoid altering your behaviour for too long, your relationship may be ruined. 

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