A woman’s dressing is one of those things that raise eyebrows in a society, no matter how good she may appear. Not everyone reacts the same way to it. Some could smile, frown or even make abusive comments and this is the same way it affects relationships.
No doubt, this causes a lot of issues between couples.But if your boyfriend says he would love to see you dressed a certain way and he is not controlling about it, that’s a positive thing. Some guys like making their relationships fun, so they’d like to see their girls looking attractive, colorful, or seducing them.
On the contrary, if he sounds a bit forceful about it then it may be a warning sign of control. It could be a terrifying scenario to see how a simple thing as a dress could turn a loving boyfriend into a violent one. A few times it ends a relationship if the lady is free-spirited or resistant to control.
Other times, there could be constant fights or disagreements between the couple. However, no matter how hard a situation can be, there’s always a way to control it. Read on to know 9 ways to control this kind of situation.
- 1 9 Ways To Handle A Boyfriend That Dictates What You Should Wear
- 2 FAQs
- 3 Conclusion
9 Ways To Handle A Boyfriend That Dictates What You Should Wear
1. Communicate your feelings
Communication is one of the first things you should do when your boyfriend complains about what you wear. Being a woman, you already understand your body and how you feel when you wear certain things. Comfort may be one of those feelings but your boyfriend doesn’t know your body as much as you do. So, it’s something you should tell him.
Listening to you would also give him a clue of why you dress the way you do which would aid him more on how to add to or correct it. That way, he can understand when to make his own request for an outfit change.
2. Think about compromising
Not everything you both experience has to go completely your way or his. Sometimes, you need to meet in the middle. As a good girlfriend who would like to be free to dress the way she wants to, you should suggest it to him and observe how he reacts to the idea.
A good headway is when you both come to an agreement to make your mode of dressing convenient for you and him. If there’s none, then that may be a red flag which may not be good in the long run. Either way, come to a compromise. Some days you could do it his way and other times, your way or a combination of the two.
3. Listen to his reasons
Listening makes people learn. And when it comes to relationships, you learn every day. You may assume or fear he’s slipped into his possessive side to try to control things but it could be something different.
He could have other reasons for his behavior, so it’s best you listen to him. It could be when you’re having your usual casual conversation or you could pick a specific time to discuss it.
During your conversation, you may be surprised to hear that his concerns are more in your favor. He may be scared of you exposing your body and getting hurt, embarrassed, or harassed if you both live in an unsafe environment.
Whatever his reasons may be, relationship experts say some dating issues get automatically solved when couples talk and listen to each other. So, listen to his reasons and see how you can both come up with possible solutions.
4. You could try doing it his way
Most people always want to have it their own way. It’s not a bad thing. But don’t forget you’re in a relationship and you could try to do it in a different way to switch things up a bit. It also makes things fun between you and your partner.
For example, you could pick out three possible outfits that work, try them on, and ask him which one he thinks works best. He could say “Oh the heels don’t go well with the top” or “This style doesn’t fit so well with the interview” or “It makes you look a bit dull.” If he doesn’t like any of them, you could ask him for suggestions. That way, you get to make it work together.
5. Try the reverse method
A few people have proven this method to be successful. This yields the same result in many ways which includes improving his behavior towards your dressing. How do you do it? Suggest that he chooses the clothes you wear whenever he’s uncomfortable with your dressing. Don’t make it end up in a fight or disagreement, do it in a friendly way.
That little act would go a long way to manage things. It would either makes things hilarious between both of you, strengthen your bond, make him more relaxed when you dress how you want, or make him tired enough to give you free will to wear your own kind of clothes. However it ends, the result would be positive if you have an understanding boyfriend.
6. Tease him once in a while
Sometimes, it’s good to make things sound lighter than they may seem. Nothing is ever so serious. Men have different interests when it comes to women and humor is one of them. If he wants you to wear certain clothes that you feel are revealing, you could playfully say no and replace it with another promise you can fulfill. If he accepts it, that’s a big sign of respect.
Your boyfriend may just want to see you look attractive to him. So once in a while, he may want to see you wear some set of clothes; the ones he feels make you sexy or admirable. It’s not a bad thing. The only problem could be if you’re not comfortable wearing them at the moment. Then you could find a way around it.
7. Don’t fight about it
Your boyfriend’s complaint about your dressing is not something you should be fighting for. Situations like this could be unbearable but you should always try to control your temper to avoid making things worse. If you already understand his behavior, good enough. That makes it easier for you to settle things.
When you are arguing about the clothes you intend to wear and it feels like it would escalate into an argument or a fight, you could try keeping calm or making a little joke out of it. Disagreements could make people feel bad, especially when you don’t have an upper hand. But try not to let it get out of hand.
8. Put yourself in his shoes
From your perspective, he may sound like a controlling or insecure boyfriend but it’s advisable to empathize. Imagine you’re not such a fan of dyed hair because you feel uneasy when you see people with colored hair.
Then he dyes it and you say to him “You won’t go around with your colored hair like that. You should cover it with a beanie.” Or he wants to go to the beach with the boys and he’s wearing a pair of jeans but you stop him because you feel it’s inappropriate. How do you think he’d feel about that? He would feel bad.
That’s the same way you feel when he talks about your dress. More so, it’s the same way he’d feel if you complained about his choice on something else. So when he complains, try not to overreact. Empathize with him but at the same time, don’t let it affect your choice if you’re sure you’re right about it.
9. He could just be concerned
Not everybody can walk up to you to compliment or talk about your dressing. Some people may be afraid of how you’d react. You may be surprised that your loved ones may be battling this as well.
Sometimes, the way you appear in your head or eyes on certain outfits may be entirely different from the way others see you. And this may be how your husband sees you when you wear a particular dress.
It takes courage for some men to drop comments about people’s dressing. Also, not every style fits certain occasions and weathers. And he may be concerned about that. So ask him why he wouldn’t want you to wear certain clothes when you do and listen to what he has to say. You could also explain why you make your choices for a better understanding if need be.
It’s okay if your boyfriend likes seeing you wear a particular kind of outfit. This might be because he feels you look good in them. But when his excuses have to do with your clothes exposing your body, then it may be controlled.
There are a lot of them and they also depend on your boyfriend as an individual. These signs include; insecurity, unnecessary criticism, demand for praises, making sure things go only his way, and sometimes bad temper. Being paranoid could be another sign.
He may be feeling insecure when you wear them. Also, some men feel women dress to seek attention which could also be one of your boyfriend’s thoughts when you wear those clothes. For instance, he may be uncomfortable seeing you wear a short or tight dress.
Yes, they do. There are different things that attract guys to girls’ outfits. If her outfit appears a certain way and it’s exceptionally colorful, tight, alluring, unfitted, hilarious, or attractive, it would get the guy’s attention in little or no time.
Bad relationships are of types and they come with different kinds of toxic signs based on the nature of the relationship. Some of them include; disagreement on very minor things, feelings of neglect, fear, mistrust, and many others.
It’s not a big deal if your boyfriend tells you what to wear. If it becomes annoying or too bad, feel free to use the 9 ways I’ve mentioned to manage the situation. Also, if you liked this article, remember to share it and drop a comment.
As hopeless romantic I struggled tremendously in my love life. After many years of searching, trial & error, and countless failed relationships, I finally found my Mr. Right. It wasn't an easy road, but one that has taught me an incredible amount about the workings of relationships between men and women, and this is what I hope to share through my writing on this blog.